Hello everyone :h
I would like to apologize for being away for so long. I know that some of you were worried about me and I feel bad for putting you guys through that. It was too hard for me to even accept what had transpired the day that I stopped posting. ( Im getting tearful just posting it now ). No I have not had a beer or anything like.
Everything was going along fairly well until I got served with the Divorce papers from my wife. It wasnt the Divorce that floored me it was her Affidavit. She basically stated that I was a no good drunken Father that didnt give a crap about my children. That my actions were damaging to them and their growth...And that She was the Only one bringing up the boys. When I read that she was asking for Limited Supervised Visits I lost my emotional strength. It was like something Zapped my faith in people. How can somebody be so cruel. I was so overwhelmed from what I was reading that put me into a state of disbelief. The only thing that made it better was to keep myself occupied at work. However every day after work I would be driving home and the last mile I started thinking about how alone I am..every day. Fear about loosing my boys overwhelmed me. I still have thoughts of how much this is hurting the boys every time I have to drop them back off at their grandparents...Kills me inside. I physically get pains in my gut and start to empathize with what they are going through. I have taken the high road in this whole thing but I had moments of such pain that I almost thought about really going after her in court. But for the children its not worth straying from my values or morals...I refuse to attack another person but to only defend myself. So yes..sometimes I feel like lashing back but I cant.
So every time I was to bring myself to log into the Nest I found that I could not even think about how I feel much less sharing it with you. Actually I still have a difficult time. I NEED this to pass for my emotional well being. Not expressing myself and keeping things bottled up is not helping .. so here I am. I do have to say that I felt uncomfortable dumping my problems and feelings about these last 10 days or so here openly in the forum.
It was a selfish and inconsiderate thing for me to do .. not posting and basically vanishing.. I feel very much about that.
I have an appointment with a lawyer today so hopefully things will subside and my confidence of everything turning out well will come back. So after this meeting I will come back and tell you how it went.
Hey but good thing is that Im closing in on my 60th day so No problems on that front .. even during all This BS stuff I have never even thought about lifting a tin
Time for me to head over to a few threads and some PM's that I have been meaning to get to.
Thanks again everyone for having someone to talk to.
Dave :l
I would like to apologize for being away for so long. I know that some of you were worried about me and I feel bad for putting you guys through that. It was too hard for me to even accept what had transpired the day that I stopped posting. ( Im getting tearful just posting it now ). No I have not had a beer or anything like.
Everything was going along fairly well until I got served with the Divorce papers from my wife. It wasnt the Divorce that floored me it was her Affidavit. She basically stated that I was a no good drunken Father that didnt give a crap about my children. That my actions were damaging to them and their growth...And that She was the Only one bringing up the boys. When I read that she was asking for Limited Supervised Visits I lost my emotional strength. It was like something Zapped my faith in people. How can somebody be so cruel. I was so overwhelmed from what I was reading that put me into a state of disbelief. The only thing that made it better was to keep myself occupied at work. However every day after work I would be driving home and the last mile I started thinking about how alone I am..every day. Fear about loosing my boys overwhelmed me. I still have thoughts of how much this is hurting the boys every time I have to drop them back off at their grandparents...Kills me inside. I physically get pains in my gut and start to empathize with what they are going through. I have taken the high road in this whole thing but I had moments of such pain that I almost thought about really going after her in court. But for the children its not worth straying from my values or morals...I refuse to attack another person but to only defend myself. So yes..sometimes I feel like lashing back but I cant.
So every time I was to bring myself to log into the Nest I found that I could not even think about how I feel much less sharing it with you. Actually I still have a difficult time. I NEED this to pass for my emotional well being. Not expressing myself and keeping things bottled up is not helping .. so here I am. I do have to say that I felt uncomfortable dumping my problems and feelings about these last 10 days or so here openly in the forum.
It was a selfish and inconsiderate thing for me to do .. not posting and basically vanishing.. I feel very much about that.
I have an appointment with a lawyer today so hopefully things will subside and my confidence of everything turning out well will come back. So after this meeting I will come back and tell you how it went.
Hey but good thing is that Im closing in on my 60th day so No problems on that front .. even during all This BS stuff I have never even thought about lifting a tin
Time for me to head over to a few threads and some PM's that I have been meaning to get to.
Thanks again everyone for having someone to talk to.
Dave :l
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