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a tough day
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a tough day
had a tough day today and had to face some home truths with the family and have heart to hearts with my girls and it was very emotional. other things came to light and skeletons from out the closet which was very nerve wracking and i felt like running as far as i could so as not to confront this as this is an entirely different personal matter but needless to say i didnt feel like a drink probably due to the kudzu but id like to think will power came into it too. i dont want to let my girls down again plus i have a very important job and do quite a bit of driving sometimes so i cant afford to slip up big time or everything goes down the pan. its good to talk about it though and of course there are some things that the family dont understand and dont need to know and its so good to be able to tell all of you on here cos i know that maybe you can relate to me and understand. by the way i had to know if i had my dinner on sunday or how i got to bed and when as i couldnt remember which is the worst part but now i have had the blanks filled in for me i feel so much better. anyhow af day 2 for me
lots of loveTags: None
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a tough day
Juney, hang in there - it sounds like you are in the right frame of mind to deal with the battles that you are facing right now.
Keep up the great work, and in time those things will sort themselves out (and you're right, getting things out and talking about them makes a world of difference).Sobriety Date: June 15, 2007 -- "It's not having what you want, It's wanting what you've got...."
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a tough day
hello juney
Hello juney. Nice to get to know you. Hang in there. This place is great for getting things out. We are here for you. I made the mistake of not coming here as much, and wham!! Did it burn me. I'm so happy that the beautiful people here will take me back. It sounds like some things in life are presenting a challenge. We are here to help you in anyway possible.where does this go?
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a tough day
well squeaky i got through the honesty about my drinking and faced my demons but one night in february maybe when i got totally bladdered i just passed out and my girls got hold of my phone and read some private messages to and from a male friend. very embarassing and thats what was facing me when i got home from work tonight. it was very scary cos i cant remember what i had said in them but they were very personal. thats what happens when i drink to much, i pass out and dont know what im doing or where i am. very dangerous and not recommended and i have to say my friend doesnt know im a drinker so another reason why i have to stop
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a tough day
Eeek! But it's done now isn't it. I wonder why they waited so long to ask you about it, they really must feel relieved that you are making yourself open to questions.
Blackouts - I was getting them more and more before I made my decision to sort myself out so I know exactly what you're talking about. My alter-ego is a total maniac, very needy and will do just about anything to get attention. She is gone now though ;o) Drink-dialling is a particular favourite although I always think I am sober enough when i do it. Texting is another but typing slows me down!
As for your friend, he doesn't know you've stopped drinking but I bet he notices you're not quite so forthcoming!!
Do you feel physically any better though? Hard to sleep naturally for a while, body's not used to it. Is the kudzu helping do you think?
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a tough day
i think the kudzu does help or at least id like to think it does. i have got some of the korean ginseng that you mentioned also. kudzu is once a day and the ginseng three times so i suppose i will have to give it time to get into my system to feel any real benefits but i have to say the urge to drink has left me which is brilliant.
my friend lives long distance so he wouldnt know about my drinking anyway. i am quite forthcoming anyhow sometimes but i have to say i think i went overboard one night and i had to apologise to him and make the excuse that i was just tired and had taken strong painkillers and to just ignore me.
i do feel better though today and im going to see a counsellor next week just for more support really.
well im off to bed now. early start tomorrow but do please keep in touch and take care of you and yours
lots of love xx
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a tough day
Hi Juney,
Just read your post, as I've just got in from work, but I'm back tomorrow at 7am.
Not a very good sleeper. I know how you feel about blackouts, I've had many,they
completely horrify me. I have made notes in the past to try to remember what I did
the previous night, then I would'nt be able to read my own writing, also when it's
been pointed out that I did something silly etc. I would pretend to remember it.
I am just hoping and praying that those days have gone.
Glad you are going for counselling, it helps.
I also agree with squeaky about your right to privacy..
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