Its just to much like hard work trying to moderate

[poppy62]

Its just to much like hard work trying to moderate

Thank you so much everybody just starting on day 3 af and reading replies from people who have been af for months and years is so encouraging that it is achieveable and well worth doing. My idea of moderation was having 2 drinks majority of the time but then for no apparent reason other than my addicted brain going absolutly crazy drinking my self in oblivion, which for my family and myself was a nightmare as they never knew which times the 2 drinks would turn into the 22 !!. So it obviously caused a lot of rows and upset with my husband and diffferant partners over the years and many ugly scene that I am totally ashamed off.I am trying to take what Pinecone said 'cutting ties and never looking back' on board beating myself up about past mistakes will not help me stay strong and af looking to the future and the joy that being af bring to myself and those around me.. Thank you all so much for your wise words support , example and encouragement.

[OlgadaPolga]

Its just to much like hard work trying to moderate

I can totally identify with that, poppy. Sometimes I'd be "normal" and drink a couple of glasses of wine, but no one (least of all me) knew when the two glasses would turn into the rest of the bottle and half a bottle of gin. I know abstinence is the way forward for me. It feels scary though. Sometimes it feels exciting and liberating and brilliant but then my alcoholic Beast starts taunting me. I have to get it to SHUT UP!!! Good on you for your day 3. I am with you xx

[available]

Its just to much like hard work trying to moderate

Pinecone;1594847 wrote: Hi Poppy,

I really like this thread and it sounds like you have your head in the right spot on this topic. I was a long time "moderator" before coming to MWO. What I mean was I drank a ton, occasionally inhibited my intake (to prove that I was "moderating," of course), and then made up for it in style later on (have to reward myself for "good behaviour," don't I?)!

Pine I can totally relate to what you said. My tries at moderation failed dismally. Would start off at 2 glasses and think I can do this. Two days later have 3 or 4 glasses on a Friday to celebrate, Saturday think I had better have a few as it is Sunday and i have to work Monday. Then the vicious cycle would start.

Brydie is so right in saying there is no such thing as moderation. 7 standard drinks a week for women, gees isn't that a night? For me it was.

I know I cant moderate, I would love to but I am an alcoholic and we can't do that. My tries at moderation have been dismal failures, my decision to stay AF won't be.