Devastated and terrified

[Darkest Diamond]

Devastated and terrified

Just read your post Kradle ...... yes I am extremely stressed..... going to have a warm bath and apply anti itch cream afterwards and yes have an anti hystamine. (Your poor little girl getting so stressed)

[Darkest Diamond]

Devastated and terrified

Awful 2 days

I think another reason why my stress level and itching etc might have soared during the last 2 days is that I go back to work on Tues I always worry a lot before I go back. The great thing with all this is that I do not want to drink!!

[Darkest Diamond]

Devastated and terrified

In the past crazy though it seems I would have wanted to drink to blot it all out.

[Kradle123]

Devastated and terrified

Darkest, I just noticed your quit date!

I too am on the 28th as I've been so off again on again - 30 days here....60 days there....over the last two years- :nutso:

We can do this. We have the biggest, bestest support system in the universe here!! :l

PS- Sedona's in the kitchen singing you are my Sunshine....

[Pavati]

Devastated and terrified

Sorry, DD - 9 days! :goodjob:

You do have a stressful job, so I do think it is a good idea to look into some of the natural stress relievers that people have suggested around here.

[treetops]

Devastated and terrified

DD - well done on staying AF.
I wrote you a long PM last week about parts of my story and in it I told you about the serious health problems I had as a result of AL. I was sick with worry that I was on the road to cirrhosis as I had very elevated liver function results (as well as other symptoms) but had to wait for months for an appointment with a liver specialist.
I really do know the agony of this. I also had to do this this waiting while coping with a very stressful work situation and running the household, being a Mum. I was terrified that I would leave my daughter without her mother. That guilt really hit me.

The best I could do was decide to quit drinking for good. This took some time to finally sink in to me - and in the meantime I wore myself down with trying to stop. I bored myself out of drinking! I did finally quit and since then my health has improved - but that took months. I just had to keep at it.

Others are also right in that many of the symptoms can indicate other physical and mental conditions. The very best thing you must do is to not drink AL. You can't undo the past but you can nuture a much healthier future. I think I wrote once on MWO - that I wanted to live. Its that simple.
PM me if you need more.:h

[j-vo]

Devastated and terrified

Hi DD,
I, too, had the itchiness that you speak of, as well as the dull ache where my liver is located. Oh, I googled nonstop. Very dangerous thing to do to make our minds very crazy, increase anxiety, and just throw us all over the place.

Keep doing what you're doing by staying AF. That's the best medicine you can give yourself now. Drink lots of water to flush out whatever is causing the itchiness. Someone said take a walk. Get your mind off of this and onto healthy things. Watch a funny movie. I know my anxiety went through the roof when I had to go back to work, and that stress exacerbates the symptoms. Hugs to you DD.

[Dottie Belle]

Devastated and terrified

I put fresh lemon in my water..read that it helps too....so of course I did it...no clue if it helped but I felt better....

[Darkest Diamond]

Devastated and terrified

Just got back from aa meeting, now going to eat lots of lovely food and watch a dvd, thank you to everyone for the support. I must stress that whatever the outcome of these tests I will not drink DD

[j-vo]

Devastated and terrified

Good for you DD! That's most important right now!!!!

[Guitarista]

Devastated and terrified

DD,

Extreme anxiety and stress can cause you to feel very itchy.

Good luck friend.

[badger]

Devastated and terrified

Darkest Diamond;1608460 wrote: If elevated levels are shown in relation to the liver, how can the doctor tell if it is fatty liver or early stage cirhossis?

I'm not a medical professional, but there are various enzyme markers in the blood relating to liver health. from memory, something like ALT, AST, GGT & Bilirubin. some markers show inflammation, some show temporary damage; I think high ALT & AST together can indicate permanent damage

when I originally got sober about 10 years ago (before I fell off the wagon about 4 years ago), my GGT was 20x the max healthy level (they re-tested it to make sure it wasn't an error). my eye-whites were like egg-yplks & I was in a shit state, but after 3 months' AF, my levels were all back down to normal. the liver is remarkably resilient, if you give it a chance

DD - your symptoms may match Cirrosis, but I dare say they match a load of other things, or combinations of things, too. your body is in a state of flux at the moment - you've just quit AL & your body is just getting used to being AF, your body chemistry is trying to settle down

I know it's hard, but worrying about it isn't going to change anything now

all the best for tomorrow, let us know how you get on

-badger

[spuddleduck]

Devastated and terrified

DD - just adding my support here. I have no more advice than others have given. try to relax.. yes I know, easier said than done. i hope your results bring you good news. sending you strength.

[sixtyfour]

Devastated and terrified

Dark Diamond

My heart goes out to you. I know whatever anyone says you will not really be able to absorb all the wise words until you have those results. I am a panicker and a Googler too - it's a dreadful combination, and my friends on MWO have seen me in action. Badger gave you some helpful information on top of all our advice but I know how scared you will be. The trouble is, what you have read is now in your mind. Try to focus on what people on here have been telling you, because EVEN IF your results come back and your fears are realised, it is not the end and you are NOT about to die. I was scared of my liver function tests too, but successive tests for some time have all shown normal levels. And now I'm almost 7 weeks AF and set on my future of total sobriety I believe it will only get better. Let me give you another success story - nobody could have been worse than my son - early 30s, an alcoholic since his mid teens and last year he was admitted to hospital critically ill, the worse kind of alcoholism had got him trapped. His hospital detox despite the best medical supervision was long and difficult and for two weeks we were warned that he was unlikely to survive. We all began preparing ourselves for life without him. Miracles do happen, he recovered and came home and his liver has healed - his eyes and skin were bright yellow for a couple of months, the bloating gradually disappeared, the terrible pain in his side has gone. He drank water all day every day, we gave him good food, he exercised and got plenty of fresh air. Today he has a job and a future. (And yes, idiot that I was, I continued kidding myself that drinking myself to oblivion three times a week was somehow OK and I was not on the same path as my son). I thank God for everyone on here who has given me such great advice and got me off that path and onto the straight and narrow. Take heart, Diamond. Please stay close to the board and let us know how you get on - we'll be watching and waiting for you to post. What time is your appointment? We are all here for you.

[scottish lass]

Devastated and terrified

So many of us do the same thing, we know what our drinking does to us and that is why we are here. We are scared of what our negligence has done to us and can see liver failure in so many things that have other causes. I hope you have been able to talk honestly to your health care provider so they can help you. Liver tests do not always show the accurate picture as to what us happening - your ALT and AST can be low in early stages, also in late stages when the liver has started to fail - so please don't depend on these numbers alone - tell your MD what your worries are so that they can help work out what the cause is, and you can stop trying to self diagnose - you are causing yourself so much worry that may not be needed! The internet is a scary place - you can convince yourself that you have many things once you start reading!
Let your doctor help you, and you concentrate on staying af as that is one of the best things you can do to help yourself.
I hope all goes well, and you get some answers so you can continue with your joyful living without all the worry now you are 9 days into it!!