today is my 50th birthday.
My present to myself is to make a commitment to come back here and rejoin my old friends and make new ones. I am also giving myself the gift of sobriety. This gift will not come easily, but all worthwhile things in life take hard work and determination. I am starting my own thread this time?.
Turning 50 is so hard for me!! I know it is just another day but it is a reminder that I am not getting any younger and I am wasting too much precious time thinking about drinking, drinking, blacking out, passing out, waking up in the middle of the night unable to sleep, dozing off for an hour or so and then waking up hungover only to start the entire ridiculous process all over again!! SO STUPID It isn't fun, I don't look forward to it, it feels like a punishment?.
I tried remaining AF on my own many different times in the past 8 months or so. I would last 5 or 6 days and then boom?..back at it again.
Saturday night I told my husband that I HAVE to stop?that I HAVE to come onto this site every day and go to meetings and just do whatever it takes?..Guess what? I don't remember saying that but when he told me yesterday what I had said, I totally agreed with myself.
The time has come. Turning 50 means I need to turn a corner and love myself a little more. The way to do that is to remain AF.
Peace
My present to myself is to make a commitment to come back here and rejoin my old friends and make new ones. I am also giving myself the gift of sobriety. This gift will not come easily, but all worthwhile things in life take hard work and determination. I am starting my own thread this time?.
Turning 50 is so hard for me!! I know it is just another day but it is a reminder that I am not getting any younger and I am wasting too much precious time thinking about drinking, drinking, blacking out, passing out, waking up in the middle of the night unable to sleep, dozing off for an hour or so and then waking up hungover only to start the entire ridiculous process all over again!! SO STUPID It isn't fun, I don't look forward to it, it feels like a punishment?.
I tried remaining AF on my own many different times in the past 8 months or so. I would last 5 or 6 days and then boom?..back at it again.
Saturday night I told my husband that I HAVE to stop?that I HAVE to come onto this site every day and go to meetings and just do whatever it takes?..Guess what? I don't remember saying that but when he told me yesterday what I had said, I totally agreed with myself.
The time has come. Turning 50 means I need to turn a corner and love myself a little more. The way to do that is to remain AF.
Peace
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