Can it be done?

[MTman]

I haven't posted for a couple of years. I am still drinking, mostly wine these days. Two year ago I quit for 60 days. That was the longest time for me in 40 years. Now I am back to it. It seems that about a 1.5 ml a day is about the right dose. As normal I get disgusted with myself and the fact that I just can't moderate the way I want too. I don't know at this point if I should fight it or just give in and try to maintain the current intake? There is really no reason for any of this other than I like to mellow at the end of the day. I bet there are a lot of people out there that can relate or share what is going on with me? If so, let's connect and see if we can help each other find a path.

[Byrdlady]

Can it be done?

ALL of us can relate. Trust me, everyone of us WISHES we could control our intake. Unfortunately, ALK is a progressive disease and even if you might be happy with your current intake, it is likely to do nothing but increase over time. If i look back over the last 10 years of my drinking career, it got nothing but worse. I was trying to watch it, too.

I imagine when you came here 2 years ago, you were ready to make a change, and you did very well! 60 days is huge! But as you can see, once we start drinking again, the cycle continues. As badly as we WISH things to be different, it is what it is. I bet if you remember those AF days you had, they were some of the best! I gotta tell you, not drinking is 1000 times MORE relaxing than drinking. I would have never thought it. My blood pressure is down, so is my anxiety and my energy and mood are up! I now know how to relax without AL. It is totally possible. I have sat here and watched people start posting. Then they post agaian after they start drinking. The difference is STARK! Anxiety and paranoia skyrocket. Hope flies out the window...enter guilt,shame and remorse.

I found that I finally had to stop fighting what eventually had to happen....come on over to the Newbies nest and get started! Also be sure to visit the tool Box for valuable tips and coping skills. Links to both are below. Believe me, I would have never thought Id be on an ALKIE site touting the benefits of being sober, but life is full of surprises. I've been sober 3 years and my only regret is that I didnt do it sooner. No, I screwed around for years trying and denying. What a waste of time. Jump om in, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. We are so glad you're here, we can help! Byrdie

[Myluck]

Can it be done?

Mtman 1-2 bottles of white wine was my doze evening happiness - I can totally relate to this. Waking up about 4-5 in the morning evey day with legs cramps, thirsty, anxiety and hangover. Poor sleep, lack of attention, memory issues. Every day I promised myself - no drinks tonight, and there always was a reason. Unfortunately AL eventually catches up either you - I am sure you heard about liver and pancreas damage, as well as damage to our brains that cause early onset of "age" related issues. I will encourage you to try quitting for more then 60 days and see how it feels. This place is very supportive - you probably know

[lead366]

Can it be done?

Hello MT

Welcome back---the people here are great.

40 years?....If you think you may have a problem...the best place to start is to gather all the knowledge you can as to how WORSE it will get...it sure got worse for me....and probably everyone else here.

I was like you.....I cut down...to 1.5 bottles per day---or two lol

Once you accept and work at it?...there is no battle..and things get better each day.

Denial is the big battle.

It basically comes down to your own personal choice...If you wish to stop..you can and it is a matter of steps and some common sense applied daily...thats all.

Ive relapsed many times......same old thing...I just dont want to drink...and I get advice all the time ( daily) on how to stay sober.

If you wish to find a path as you mention....here is a link to a great book as to how alcoholism works, advances....and how to tame it. For ten bucks?....deffo worth the read..

http://www.amazon.com/Under-Influenc..._sim_kstore_10

[poppy62]

Can it be done?

Welcome back MT such wise words and as Brydie says we can all relate I have tried to moderate for over 25 years never worked. If nothing else drinking is a habit and is not easy to give up, read around make a plan look into doing new things to replace the time you spent drinking. And never forget you can drink all you like but you are making the positive decision not to drink. Dont dwell on the fact you went back to drinking after your 60 af , focus on the fact you did 60 days before so you can do that again and this time you have the experience and knowldege not to slip back again. Look forward to seeing you around and observing your progress.