Kairos back again

[Kairos]

Hi all,
Well I'm back again. I've had a good few goes at it by now and am back for another try. I seem to get so far -usually about 3/4 months and then give up thinking I'm not so bad after all. I really want to commit this time and would appreciate any help you'd all be willing to give me.
I wonder how many times these few sentences have been repeated on here in one form or another? :


But anyway, I know you guys will be my support and inspiration and that gives me the courage to keep going.
Thanks,
Kairos

[satz123]

Kairos back again

Kairos;1630324 wrote: Hi all,
Well I'm back again. I've had a good few goes at it by now and am back for another try. I seem to get so far -usually about 3/4 months and then give up thinking I'm not so bad after all. I really want to commit this time and would appreciate any help you'd all be willing to give me.
I wonder how many times these few sentences have been repeated on here in one form or another? :


But anyway, I know you guys will be my support and inspiration and that gives me the courage to keep going.
Thanks,
Kairos

Hi Kairos
I've made it to 8 months today - not with any real struggle - but lest I fool myself - I am interested to know how things went for you ?
Like did you go back to daily drinking after thinking you could control it?

[Kairos]

Kairos back again

Well done satz on eight months. Congratulations. Keep going.
Perhaps it's just a case of old habits dying hard, I'm not sure. I've been a social drinker for so long and it's only gotten out of control in the last few years. We socialise a lot and booze usually features. My other half drinks and there is some pressure there as there's always wine in the house. My downfall is good red wine.
I'm conflicted as I like to look after my diet and I exercise a lot. 4/5 times a week but I have a problem and it's time to address it. As I say, I've gone back after a few months. It kinda creeps up slowly. It only ever starts off a single glass and then a few days later another glass. The next time perhaps 2 and then with a few months I'm back to a bottle.
There is no way I can afford to rationalise any more. It's such an illusion to think I have a handle on this. I don't.

[Lavande]

Kairos back again

Welcome back Kairos

I stopped & started so many times on my own - it wasn't even funny
Once I found MWO & read other people's stories & experiences, everything changed. I learned that I had to stop BS-ing myself. I will never, ever have control over AL & the best thing for me to do was just accept that fact & stop the struggling. I am so grateful that I did too

satz - CONGRATS to you on your 8 AF months!!!

[little beagle]

Kairos back again

I am here to support you. It can be done. I would start and stop, but this tme was the last. I can only control alcohol by not drinking it. Not one, not ever. Then I am not powerless. :goodjob:comng back.

[j-vo]

Kairos back again

HI Kairos,
Welcome back. I, like you and so many of us, gave moderation my all, but failed. We're here for you and if you need anything, give a holler. I know sobriety takes work, but it worth it to have a much more fulfilling and healthier life!

[Kairos]

Kairos back again

Thanks Lavande,
I recognize you as a long time abstainer on MWO so if you can give me any tips over the weeks about how I might get over the 4 month hurdle I'd be very happy. Always assuming I even get there this time.
K

[Kairos]

Kairos back again

Little Beagle and JVo,
Thanks for the support.
It might be because it's mid winter here and so dark, wet and miserable for so much of the time that it's taking all of my strength to even want to give it up.
Going to try anyhow,
K

[lead366]

Kairos back again

Such impressive writing here...thanks!

Yaaaa.....after going 30-60 days then numerous relapses........I guess I just have to slug it out for six months or so and find something to give me joy. I like being sober...just dont know how to live sober I guess. This is no cakewalk. Frustrated indeed I am.

[Dottie Belle]

Kairos back again

Hi Kairos and welcome back.. I will have 6 months on March 1st and I got wobbly at 4 months and every now and then but when the urge strikes I have been telling myself that "I don't drink"...I have stopped and started more times than I can count but coming here and posting every day and reading many threads here has been the difference this time I am sure. When I get lazy I open the door to fall off the path I have set...
This can be done!!

[frances]

Kairos back again

Reading your post, you could be me. I have been at this for years. I realized lately that it seems very cyclical - usually in February I get fed up with drinking so much and come back on here to try to get things under control. This is my 3rd or 4th time. I do well for a few months - then summer comes and vacations, etc. and I get back into my old habits and by the end of the year I am back to drinking too much, too frequently. I have not yet decided to quit for good. That is probably my biggest problem! I have decreased my amounts to 2-3 drinks a day this week (but still drink daily).

I know I should quit but can't yet seem to bring myself to actually do it.

I will be pulling for you :-) and hope that you can give me some inspiration!

Your name already does - it may be coincidental - but I have served on a Kairos prison ministry 'outside' and it was an incredible experience. I should take that as a reminder of bigger and better things that I should be concentrating on!

[gracieb]

Kairos back again

Hi Kairos!

I'm new around here, but I've picked up a lot of tips and it's been a huge help. Hope you feel welcome and find the support you need!

[Lavande]

Kairos back again

Kairos,
For me the big thing that kept me going was adopting an attitude of gratitude
I was so sick & tired of making the same bad choices over & over again. I really needed a major & positive change in my life!

I am still grateful for every clear-headed moment in my life. You can do this too

Lav

[Kairos]

Kairos back again

Mollyka and Lead,Dottiebell Frances and gracieb,
Thanks for your support. I'll be looking out for you in the next few weeks as I live my life free of AL for the first time in a long time. Frances, I'm glad you resonate with the name Kairos. We need as many moments of Grace as we can get.
Lavande, Yes I can relate to gratitude. I have so much to be thankful and grateful for.
And yes, I am also sick and tired of making the same old choices.
So today is DAY ONE of the rest of my life.
Thanks again guys. I may need you from time to time. I usually find the first week really tricky.
XKairos

[frances]

Kairos back again

Good luck Kairos - we will be with you! Yesterday I looked at Dottie's Toolbox link (see the bottom of her signature line) - if you haven't looked at that before you might find some tips. I liked the one about cravings. I had that happen yesterday evening while driving home from work (well, of course, everyday, but...) and when it did I tried to do what Work In Progress suggested and it really seemed to help.

Good luck this week!