First time posting and a bit nervous

[damo180]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Hi Aeg, stick around here if you want to gave a real go at staying off the booze.
Everyone on here can be such an amazing support.
I worked in a bar and stayed sober whilst working there.
It CAN be done and it will be the best decision you could make.
Best of luck
Damo

[damo180]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Hi Aeg, stick around here if you want to gave a real go at staying off the booze.
Everyone on here can be such an amazing support.
I worked in a bar and stayed sober whilst working there.
It CAN be done and it will be the best decision you could make.
Best of luck
Damo

[MossRose]

First time posting and a bit nervous

AEG - so good to hear from you. You sound strong and determined. I like you already - grateful is good. Hope to see you around a lot more from now on. xx

[FlyAway]

First time posting and a bit nervous

aeg;1638289 wrote: I'm so proud of myself. It wasn't difficult today, that's good. Hope tomorrow will be as easy. Thanks for your support.

Well done Aeg! You will have some hard days, but it gets easier after a while. The only way to get to "easier" is to go through the hard stuff. Best wishes to you.

[aeg]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Thank you Molly, Damo and Albert. It's 9:30 and I'm still sober but having a harder time at the moment. Decided to check in here first for some support. It's been a crazy busy weekend and I feel like I deserve a drink. I'm going to wait, but what shall I treat myself with? Feeling kind of deprived at the moment, but I'll be strong.

I'm sure I'm supposed to be posting someplace else but the newbie thread is kind of confusing to me.

[frances]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Hi aeg - Glad to hear you are still staying sober and looking for support. You should treat yourself to something you love that has nothing to do with alcohol! Go see a good movie, have a great meal or dessert, go get a massage, anything. There are some really good posts about 'urge surfing' that I've seen - I'll try to find taht information but I think it is all on the toolbox thread - have you looked at that?

Your comment about deserving a drink - this was posted by another person (I think it was Newdreams - I will double check and correct this if I am wrong) - it really made me think and I am working on this for myself. I copied from the earlier post below:


"....And I saw people talking about "deserving a drink," again today. What I wrote about was about changing our way of thinking from this self-destructive "Deprivation Mode" to a winning, successful, positive "Gratitude Mode." Here it is:

I don't think we can begin to truly grow into a successful, lifetime, AF plan until we have managed to make the shift in our thinking from the "Deprivation Mode" to the "Gratitude Mode."

In Deprivation Mode, we think alcohol is a good thing that we are being deprived of. We are sad, and grieve the loss of what had felt like a friend to us. We consider it a treat that we never get to give ourselves again. We are envious of others who "get to drink."

In Gratitude Mode, we recognize that alcohol is (for us, because of our brain structure, genetics, physiology, etc.) a toxin, a poison, something that nearly destroyed us. Mentally, physically, and spiritually. We recognize that we have the most amazing opportunity to rid ourselves of something that makes us very sick in all those ways. We recognize the craziness of voluntarily damaging our brains, minds, bodies, families, jobs, futures. We are really, really grateful for that opportunity, and we guard it and cultivate it carefully.

Most of us start a recovery program in deprivation mode. Some people stay there forever. Those people tend not to be able to create a consistently successful program, or life, of freedom from alcohol and its devastation. Some of us transition into gratitude mode.

For most of us, Gratitude Mode does not just happen all by itself. We have to make it happen. If we want to shift into gratitude mode, we learn to cultivate it. We cultivate it by being careful about our thoughts, and about what we notice. If we find ourselves thinking about how wonderful it would be to have a drink, we deliberately shift attention away from this train of thought, and we deliberately choose to think about how good it is to know we will never humiliate ourselves with alcohol again, never again have another horrible hangover, never disappoint our children again with the way we are when we get drunk. We notice alcohol advertising, pay attention to how it makes us feel, and detach from the message by noticing how distorted the message is.

That kind of thing is crucial. We literally can BUILD a new way of thinking and feeling about things. And I think that's something to be grateful for, in itself!"

[frances]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Oh, and about the newbies nest - I can see how it is kind of confusing - a lot of folks respond directly to a long list of previous messages - you can do that or not - it is just a nice place to check in, let people know how you are doing - comment on things that make you struggle, respond and provide support to others, etc. You could also start new threads if there are particular thoughts or issues or struggles you are having...or just keep posting here. I am not familiar with everyone's habits to know whether things sometimes get 'buried' and get less responses. I do know that the newbies nest is read on a regular basis by a good number of people. Stick around here there is so much wisdom and great advice and support - it is key to so many of us in this journey - come here daily, read, post if you want to, but keep staying AF your #1 priority - you won't regret it!

[aeg]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Thank you frances, that was a very valuable post and confirming.
I woke up early this morning so happy that I didn't drink. Day 3 and I feel terrific! I took my 3 dogs for a long walk this morning, the sun was shining and I had no head ace or a groggy feeling in my body. I'm so happy that I found this place of support. I'm going to do what I can to cultivate the gratitude I feel for being healthy regardless of the way I've abused my body with alcohol and pot for 20 years. I've stopped smoking pot as well.
Thanks again,
aeg

[lead366]

First time posting and a bit nervous

GO FOR IT AEG! If your feeling good now?....just wait until you get to 7-14 days AMAZING!

There are lots of vids and articles on google re urge surfing...a good tool!

See ya tomorrow on roll call

[lead366]

First time posting and a bit nervous

GO FOR IT AEG! If your feeling good now?....just wait until you get to 7-14 days AMAZING!

There are lots of vids and articles on google re urge surfing...a good tool!

See ya tomorrow on roll call

[aeg]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Day 4 and all is good. One question, at the end of a late night, after having worked hard for 12+ hours and you get a break at about 11pm and feel like you deserve a treat and your used to treating yourself with a drink and a smoke and your not doing that anymore. What can you do? You're still at work or just got home and feel very much like you want to relax with a drink and can't think of anything else to relax you. What do you do? I'm so used to having a drink and now I feel a bit lost. I need to find something to replace it. Too late to go anywhere or do anything other than go to sleep, but too wide awake to do that. Adrenaline, yet to tiered to really do anything, don't really want to do more, just relax. Your friends are having a drink and you...?

[aeg]

First time posting and a bit nervous

One question

Day 4 and all is good. One question, at the end of a late night, after having worked hard for 12+ hours and you get a break at about 11pm and feel like you deserve a treat and your used to treating yourself with a drink and a smoke and your not doing that anymore. What can you do? You're still at work or just got home and feel very much like you want to relax with a drink and can't think of anything else to relax you. What do you do? I'm so used to having a drink and now I feel a bit lost. I need to find something to replace it. Too late to go anywhere or do anything other than go to sleep, but too wide awake to do that. Adrenaline, yet to tiered to really do anything, don't really want to do more, just relax. Your friends are having a drink and you...?

[aeg]

First time posting and a bit nervous

Quetion 2 - Is there a way to delete a post if you accidentally post it twice?

[roxane]

First time posting and a bit nervous

This is known as a trigger. Knee jerk reaction. Whatever you want to call it.

Have you eaten? Have you bought any al free drinks to grab instead?

Some people stock up on ice cream. You need to treat yourself to something you possibly wouldn't normally have.

Question two, you could edit it but how to remove I don't know!

[NoSugar]

First time posting and a bit nervous

When you edit a post, there is an option to delete it. I think you mark a box and then choose "delete this post" or something like that. Good luck!