I'm so glad I found this site!

[new horizon]

I have been sitting here all morning beating myself up for another night of excessive drinking. I hate myself for not being able to quit, or being to scared to quit. I'm a wife and a mother and a secret alcoholic.

Anyway, a little about me. I'm a stay home mom to 4 great kids. I like to drink and have my first drink around 5 and don't stop until I go to bed. I was a big partier in high school and it carried into my adult life. I had it under control until the last almost 5 years where it started out drinking every couple of days to a daily drinker. I have gained weight from it and hate myself even more. I don't want my life to be this way anymore and I think that is something I'm finally going to be able to accomplish with this site.

Any advice would be much appreciated. I plan on tapering down. I can't do a treatment center or detox because I want to keep this on the DL as much as possible. I am going to purchase the starter kit.

[NoSugar]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Welcome!

You'll find many people with similar stories here. Many of us just went cold turkey - tapering was too hard. You'd need to decide about that based on how much you routinely drink.

You might want to post in the Newbies Nest (link below). That is an active thread where you'll find a lot of information and support. The toolbox also is full of useful information.

:welcome::welcome::welcome:

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Thanks!! To me, I drink a lot, probably 12+ beers a day. My plan is to do 6 only this week with NA beer in between, then 3 next week with NA in between and then stop. Also going to the gym in the evenings rather than in the mornings. Boredom tends to get me into trouble. I get bored....I drink. I tell myself that I'm still sitting there doing nothing but I don't listen to myself. LOL!

[K9Lover]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Hi NH!

I used to "enjoy" my 12+ beers daily too. I agree with NoSugar about the tapering, I am too much of an alkie to pace myself and cut myself off. So on the nights I was "only" having 6 I found I was driving to the store for more (not good, not at all!). Like you, boredom is what always got me. You're onto something there with the gym...that's what ultimately got me out of my rut and into a healthier lifestyle! Good luck, and stick close to us. We've been there, done that....and we can help!

K9

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Thanks K9lover. You are probably right. My husband and I enable each other. He wants to go gold turkey. I could maybe have a glass of wine to take the edge off if I start feeling sick. I really really hate the taste of wine. Did you have any detox issues when you went cold turkey?

[NoSugar]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Hi, again

Most people don't have dt's etc. from going cold turkey. You obviously won't feel good but in most cases it isn't life threatening. You and your husband will be there for each other if one of you really needs medical help. If I were you, I'd not overthink this. Have a plan for what you're going to do instead of drink, stock up on AF beverages, and just take the plunge. Most people find a reason not to quit unless they just have faith and do it. You'll never regret it!

All the best, NS

[Margaret345]

I'm so glad I found this site!

That's really awesome your husband wants to go AF as well. I think that will really help you! I am a boredom drinker too. I've found a lot of encouragement from this site as well as the "bubble hour" podcasts. I am not completely alcohol free yet but I have way more AF days then I could have ever imagined when I first came here. Good luck to you!

[Rahulthesweet]

I'm so glad I found this site!

New horizon,

Welcome. You are the right place. I used to drink this much and more . And I was a beer drinker. Just about 45 days back I was just like ... Drinking every night ...

I went cold turkey. First few days your brain becomes super active as it has been used to a drug which happens to be depressant. Without you tend to become but super active. I had trouble sleeping few days. But after words ... I had trouble waking up ) felt rather too good and top of world and very deep sleep.

It is worth it ... It's and experience to quit and experience life the way it it without AL.

I didn't taper at all ... As then you start missing and become more miserable. Simply quit it ...

Come to new bites nest post everyday also go to toolbox

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Thank you all so much for the advice! DTs are something that scares the crap out of me. I had never even heard of it until I started researching how to quit drinking over a year ago. Then they just get in my mind. I'm going to go cold turkey and give it a whirl!

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

The only challenge we will face to tonight is our "bad" hours. He wants to drink after work and I usually start freaking out by 8pm if I haven't had a drink. I have a lot of trouble sleeping, so I self medicate with beer. I'm just gonna have to suck it up. I know I'll have a much happier life as a result of dealing with a few bad days.

[frances]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Good for you New Horizon! Looking forward to hearing how you are doing and seeing you in the Newbies Nest!

[NoSugar]

I'm so glad I found this site!

If you post your questions in the Newbies Nest, I bet you'll get some responses about how to handle the tough hours and get some sleep. Check the toolbox, also.

[NotHappyHourHappyLife]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Welcome New Horizons!
It is scary to take the first step, and you are blessed that your husband is willing to make this change with you. Today, you can set yourself up for success or failure- for instance, if there's beer in the fridge, take it out so it gets to room temperature. Is there a certain drink you like? Many wine drinkers will switch to cranberry juice mixed with soda water, maybe a twist of lime. You could make a pitcher of detox water to chill now, with cut citrus fruits or cucumber slices or mint leaves. You could also buy some ice cream as a treat for tonight, because your body is used to getting evening sugar and you may feel tired.

With your husband at your side, you can decide tonight that it will be a week trial, and you will re-evaluate on Friday what your plans are- many here recommend 30 days alcohol free, but tou make the choice, everyday.

Tonight when you can't sleep, come on back, okay? The neat thing about this forum is that we are from all corners of the world, so there is always someone here.

:hug: Patty

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Thank you Francies!

Thank you No Sugar - I definitely will try that.

I have one big plan already.....Eating dinner. I never eat dinner because it takes longer to get a buzz. Tonight I'm making lasagna and I'm going to sit down and eat with the kids.

[new horizon]

I'm so glad I found this site!

Thank you Happy Life. I'm a beer drinker and there are 3 left in the fridge. I did buy a 12 pack of Non Alcoholic beer last week (still untouched LOL) so maybe that could be something that helps. I definitely will utilize this forum to talk me down tonight.