Desperate to stop wine drinking

[Candlelight]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

I don't seem to be able to post a reply, but I DID IT! Thanks to all of you, yesterday was Day one completely AF. For the first time in months.

Will post in detail once I see what happens to this reply ...

[Candlelight]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

OK, looks like it worked. Today is day two, and I'm not experiencing major cravings or withdrawal symptoms yet. Didn't sleep well last night but no serious physical problems except some weakness and shakiness. Also feel kind of foggy.

I know Days four and five are supposed to be the worst, though, so I'm bracing myself! Will be turning to you guys a lot!

[riverrat]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

me too

ok, i'm new here posting, not sure if I really know how it works! i've been stalking these boards for a while and seeing my story repeat over and over again. i'm 43, waiting for my life to start so it's easy to get bored and think i can have a drink. i'm in the food business and booze has always been a part of my day! I can't do it any more. my family is at wits end, and my husband wants nothing to do with me. i gave up wine for Lent, but it's funny how vodka or whiskey can find me. somethings go to give. any advice is appreciated. i don't think I can go the AA route, and reading stuff here is motivating. thanks:thanks:

[frances]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Good for you Candle - that is great news! I'm so happy for you. :goodjob:

Welcome riverrat - I would recommend you check out the newbies nest - It is where many newcomers go and get support from each other as well as from some very wise and helpful people who have been through this all already and have great advice and provide wonderful support. There is also a toolbox thread - I don't know the link but Byrdie (you'll find posts from her in the Newbies Nest) has it in her signature as do some others. When you go to the Newbies Nest go to the last page to get to the most recent posts - you'll surely find a post from Byrdie somewhere near there!

:welcome:

[CrazyCatLady]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Way to go, Candle! I'm a fellow wino myself. I've gone cold turkey from two bottles a night many times. It sucks, but it's no worse than a minor illness, for me anyway. Nothing to be afraid of. The worst part, in my opinion, is the sleep problems.

Hi riverrat! I'm a newbie as well. I know we can do this.

[3June2013]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Candlelight, hi there, I'm also 55, found this site nearly a year ago and I have been AF since then. I am thrilled to hear your first couple of days went well. Stick close and ask away, there are many here to help. Have you talked to hubby about this? Is he a drinker? When I first quit I stocked up on healthy foods, lots of liquids, and (our friend NS will not like this) lots of high calorie comfort foods. Don't worry in the end you will lose weight. But the beginning is crucial, you want to do everything in your power to get through the first of it. I was practically glued to this site for the first months.

[Candlelight]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

3June, you're so right. I am turning to comfort foods (as in junk!) and tons of liquids. And I agree with CrazyCat that the lack of sleep is the worst. How long does it usually take to get back to normal sleep patterns?

[3June2013]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

I think it's different for all. For me, it was about not passing out, but falling asleep. I tried melatonin.. hypnosis..yoga and chamomile are my latest faves but I still have some restless nights. Still, it's all worth it!

[MossRose]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Candle - I have always been an insomniac, but it became very troublesome after I quit drinking. I learned about magnesium from a friend. You can buy it at the health food store in spray or as salt (epsom salt). A hot bath and magnesium does the trick for me. But you could always just take a supplement, however too much magnesium can cause intestinal distress. So, I stick to the transdermal form. Works great for me, my mom and several of my friends. Just a suggestion.

[Candlelight]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Thanks, all, for the suggestions! I am not feeling proud of myself today. I relapsed yesterday (day four) when dining out with my husband (who doesn't know about my problem and is just a social drinker himself) and a work colleague of his. The waiter at the restaurant pushed a new wine on us and of course, I just had to try it. The only good thing about it was that I was able to stop after two glasses -- although my problem is really drinking alone at home, I never go overboard outside. I'm feeling terrible today, though. Back to day one and hating myself. Do the relapses ever stop?

[NoSugar]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

I was like that, too, CL. I did not over drink in public and my family did not know the extent of my problem. Get a plan and stick with it! If I could do it, so can you! All the best, NS

[3June2013]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

The relapses stop when you quit. Really quit.

You might want to consider talking to hubby so that he can help you through this? Saying it out loud and having people know might be the accountability that you need to keep you on track?

[Pollyanna71]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Hi Candlelight
Welcome. I'm new here too, and a few years younger than you. I'm at home most of the time working and looking after my two girls (5&7). I'm a single mum so there aren't many days when I'm not at the stove at 4 or 5pm making dinner. I used to be out running for enjoyment as well as to stave off al cravings. Being stuck at home was the worst thing for someone like me!
I'm now 11 days without AL and feel great although went through a couple of what is called here PAWS - post-acute withdrawal syndrome. It's worse than craving a rink because you feel so totally shit. Cranky, deeply fatigued, depressed, headachy and generally belch.

But people here have great advice and awesome tips and encouragement. So hang in there. There will be crap days but I can tell you I have never felt as good as I do when i am sober, physically but more important emotionally/mentally. I can look people in the eye with no shame, no dirty secret. I have my self-respect back and with every day I don't drink that gets stronger. You can do it. I was drinking two bottles of wine on my own, regularly. People couldn't tell I'd had nearly that much. Scary how good at it one gets. I now aim to be even better at being sober.

:-)

[Candlelight]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

3June and Pollyanna, thank you. Unfortunately I can't talk to my husband at all -- our marriage has been bad for a long time (years before my drinking started) and life with him is very stressful. And since I'm alone at home most of the time, so I really have just you guys! I find that I'm able to go a few days without AL, but relapse when the stress piles up. Funny thing is, for more than 20 years I never even thought of using AL to relieve stress -- in fact, I probably drank at most two or three times a year throughout my 30s and 40s. Then somehow something snapped.

I've been off AL two days and Pollyanna, you're right, it feels good physically. But oh, the psychological craving ... it takes everything in my power to withstand it.

[j-vo]

Desperate to stop wine drinking

Hi Candlelight,
Do whatever you can to get through this day without Al. Just get through this evening. Think of something to distract you for the rest of the night. Can you go shopping or visit a friend? Go to the gym? Get a pedicure? Walk? Bike? Maybe after you get through tonight, you can journal a bit on what you hate about Al. We forget the bad things that it does to us and want to remember a buzz that lasts all of 20 minutes - that's if you're lucky. After that, it's all downhill. Have you read the toolbox? You're posting, and that the best thing you can do. If you have a friend to call and chat, do that, too. But know you can get through this tough moment.