Why?

[roxane]

Why?

congratulations on 48 hours sarah, seriously good work. it shows youself you can at least start on this and that you are determined.

as molly said, those cravings do go, eventually, and actually get weaker.

distract distract distract.

thinking of the end of the working day and then driving home with those thoughts growing is a massive trigger. anticipation. habit. 2 + 2= 4. no changing that. but that 4 can change from al to something else, anything else.

when I got this I would imagine coffee instead of al. if I could manage to get to the kettle and raid the biscuit tin, the craving went.

btw, its you that deserves better, your friends will enjoy the results. think of yourself at first, please.

[NotHappyHourHappyLife]

Why?

Welcome Sarah!

You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.

Remember that alcohol IS a poison! Our parents shielded us from it for the first 18 - 21 years of our life.

Like you, my "OFF" switch is broken. My brain doesn't know when enough is enough. So for years, I would make these mind numbing deals with alcohol: "Only on weekends", "Only beer", "Only 1 bottle of wine at night", "Only after 8 pm", "Only if I worked out"... isn't that one ironic? I was blessed when I stopped drinking, because I went to my parents house to take care of my dad, and they don't have alcohol there. Yes, I could have chosen to go to the local bar with my older brother, but I didn't WANT to, because I simply wanted to be with my dad. So when the mind battle between drinking and caring happened, I chose to care. That was 4 months ago.

Physically, the first 3 days are the BEAR.... so are you ready? Can you set yourself up for success, or failure?
If it's there, get rid of the booze in your house.
Buy some type of alternative beverages, such as tea or coffee, or sparkling water, cranberry juice.... something you will look forward to drinking in the evenings.
Get some ice cream. I have no medical evidence to support this, but there is something soothing about ice cream in the evenings. :h

Once the first three days are done... you can celebrate 4, then 5, then 6 days of being in control of your life. Of being the woman you deserve to be. Of looking forward, with hope. Of not hiding anymore.

"I have a life threatening problem that once had me".... this is a quote from Women for Sobriety.org... it has resonated in my heart since I first found it in 2008. You can go on their website for support, too.

Alcohol IS a poison. A mind altering, life threatening poison. Detox your body, give it a 30 day rest, and then with a fresh set of eyes, you can explore options.

:groupluv: We are all here for you.
:l Patty

[Ginger999]

Why?

Good morning, Sarah! Hope you've found good advice from all these reponses. The support here is amazing. All you have to do is accept it. Check in and let us know how you are doing.

[K9Lover]

Why?

Just Sarah;1670156 wrote: My friends deserve better.

YOU deserve better Sarah! I know, truly, 100% what you are going through. Like others have said, you have to DISTRACT yourself for a while. GO OUT to dinner, drag it out...get home just in time for bed. Take a hot bath then hop into bed with a good book. Learn all you can about alcohol and what it really does to the body.

Check out these videos:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dJ97Vwoup4[/video]]Drugged - High On Alcohol - YouTube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6vEe6eenpg[/video]]Cherry Healey - Old Before My Time - Alcohol Documentary - YouTube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oy5CRexmfyA[/video]][USA movie] There's Something Wrong With Aunt Diane - YouTube

Above all...be kind to yourself. Eat when you are hungry and sleep when you are tired...and cry if you need to. It DOES get easier.

Stay close to us :l

K9

[wagmore]

Why?

Just Sarah,

I replied to your post in the Newbie's Nest but wanted to answer here too in case you come here first.

I can really relate to what you described. One thing I found helpful sometimes (and still find helpful) is to think in terms of staying AF for very small periods of time rather than in terms of days or forever (although forever is my goal). Sometimes, it's all I can do to decide I will not drink for the next 30 minutes, and then after that passes I focus on the next 30 mins. Slowly, the time adds up, and as others have mentioned, the urge often passes.

Hugs to you - you CAN do this, and you are not alone. :l

[MossRose]

Why?

Hi Sarah. I read your first post and it made me flash-back to myself one year ago. I was so terrified that people would discover the truth about my drinking, that it really hindered my recovery. I used to post that I would be horrified if anyone I knew "recognized" me on MWO. Now, I freely tell people about this site. I'm proud to be a member. Plus, if they are lurking here, they have a problem too, right? But I totally understand how you feel. It's scary. But you will always be able to come here, and say anything, and we will understand. And yes, I still keep my alcoholism a secret from my doctors. I know that is going to fly against advice you will get, but I'm in the States, so what can I say.

I didn't need medical assistance to detox, so there was no need for me to go on record. However, if you feel that you would be in danger, then I would advise you to come clean with your therapist and doctor.

btw...when I finally admitted to my closest friends that I had a serious problem with alcohol, I was shocked by their response. It was loving and supportive. Please don't underestimate your friends. They love you. I doubt your best friend would disown you for telling the truth. If anything, it may bring you closer.

Lean on us for now. One day you may feel ready to "go public". But that's not a prerequisite to getting sober. You can do it on your own. That's what MWO was founded on. But I have found that it's easier if you garner support IRL too.

You are not a loser. You are just in the grip of addiction. Stay the course and post often. Hope to hear more from you.

[Pavati]

Why?

MossRose;1670462 wrote:
You are not a loser. You are just in the grip of addiction. Stay the course and post often. Hope to hear more from you.

Hi, Sarah:

These words of Moss' are SO true and hard to understand when you're close to alcohol. I felt like such a loser and am slowly learning to understand that I was vulnerable to alcohol, became addicted, and needed to quit. I still battle the "how did I let this happen," but listening to the wise people here has helped me. You didn't let this happen.

And I agree - my friends don't judge. Many of them think I am the strong one for staying focused on not drinking instead of caving at the first hint of trouble.

Hope you stay close in the nest.

Pav

[j-vo]

Why?

Hi Sarah,
I think I, too, replied in the NN, but the "friend" issue caught my eye here. Remember Sarah, everyone has something. And your friends will love you no matter what your deal is. I've told my close friends, and some close co-workers, and what's funny is that, a few years ago, I would never, ever have imagined my telling those people. It's not like I was blabbing it, but when drinks came up in conversation at a bar and I wasn't drinking, I just said I don't drink anymore. It takes acceptance that you have a problem with al, and the longer you're here posting, the more you read, the more you learn, you will get to that point. The people that love you don't judge you.