At what point does it get easier?

[See the Light]

Sorry if there is a good thread on this topic already..I searched for one but didn't find what I was looking for (if there is one please post link). I know this can vary depending on level of drinking, personal will strength, support system, physical health, etc. but I was curious what people thought (who are AF now) how many days in does it seem to get easier (maybe it never does)? I've quit some dozen or more times over the last 5 years. Average time AF was 3 days maybe, max arounnd 6. Can't seem to bust through a full weekend. I am hoping to go longer this time (who knows, maybe forever?) I need to do it, but worried about the relapse wall....I struggled every time. If I can make it to some point (say 2 weeks, 1 month, etc.) does some of the desire finally go away? Looking for some hope..some starting point target..Thx for any thoughts or links

[NoSugar]

At what point does it get easier?

Hi, STL

It progressively gets better and easier and, dare I say it?, enjoyable. Everyone is different, of course. Birdie swears by day 13 being a turning point. Others seem to wax poetic about AF living after only a day or two. If I were you, I'd mentally commit to 30 days and get at least to that point before you start second guessing yourself, comparing your progress to that of others, or most of all, giving up ! I personally felt pretty awful for a couple of weeks (very cold and tired) and even after that, I babied myself as much as I could and after meeting absolute obligations, pretty much did only what I wanted to do. Your body will start healing, your mind will start healing and over time, a more healthful you evolves. I don't think you can rush it and worrying about it is probably counter productive. By 30 days, I know I felt generally ok and it was just a matter of getting used to this new life. Around 4-6 months or so, I physically felt fine but was mentally in a funk. Some people experience this, others don't. In terms of feeling like I remember normal to be (content, involved, self-confident, energetic, outward-looking), it was sometime after a year and I think I'm still evolving back into myself. Or maybe I will end up a better self because I sure have learned some important lessons about humility, control, addiction, dependence on others, surrender, and acceptance. If you can relax into it and just let it happen naturally as you continue not to drink, you'll be fine. I hope you find it to be the really great adventure I have.

All the best, NS

[YouKayBee]

At what point does it get easier?

You won't like this, but I think a year..........life definitely gets easier before that once the booze is in check, but I feel you have to get through a load of triggers, the seasons, association.

[Byrdlady]

At what point does it get easier?

See,
NS is right, something clicked in my head at Day 13 and the waters smoothed out and I KNEW this was something I could do! There are milestones along the way, but the white knuckling cravings ended by Day 13. It was a VERY good day! TI have taken note over the years to see if this were true among other nesters, and MOST of the time, it is!!! Things change along the way and mercifully, each day does get easier! If it stayed as hard as it was those first few days, nobody could make it! Please hang in! I promise you won't have 2 hard days in a row! Byrdie

[guapo]

At what point does it get easier?

STL, I can tell you this. Once you discover how much better life is out of the cloud of alcohol, you wish you had done that much sooner

Once I discovered methods that worked for me, I have to say it really only took a few weeks to really feel significantly better and very optimistic.

That feeling remains after six months, and improves every day

[peppersnow]

At what point does it get easier?

For me the worst was the first week, physically. I felt like I had a mild flu for about the first 5-7 days. The exhaustion, though, lasted about 14 days for me. Once you get past those first 3 days or so, you'll find that you're so incredibly tired at night that you WANT to go to bed early. Some people have trouble sleeping right after they quit, but I slept like the dead those first few weeks. By Day 17 I felt my energy come back and was wanting to exercise again, and I'd say that was my turning point physically.

Psychologically, however, I was terrified the first week of DT's or seizures. I was drinking about 1 liter of vodka or gin every 2 days, and toward the end was sipping all day long most waking hours, and I was convinced my brain wouldn't know how to function without AL and I'd have DT's. The most I experienced were what I thought were auditory hallucinations at night on 2 occasions...I was convinced my daughter was in my room saying my name but she wasn't there. But since then, it still happens occasionally so probably wasn't due to alcohol withdrawal.

I also loaded up on the same supplements you did and I believe they helped, especially with cravings and anxiety. 30 days is a great goal to shoot for, because by then you will feel fantastic, but if that seems too far off to conceptualize right now, make getting through 7 days your goal --- you said that you've never made it beyond 3, so get yourself to 7. Celebrate your accomplishment (without AL) And then make 14 your goal. I guarantee you that you'll be stunned about how well you can feel if you can get to that point!

[Turnagain]

At what point does it get easier?

Hi Light - and welcome to you and all the others who are just tuning in to find support and a way out of the dreary, dark dungeon of drug addiction!

Our wonderful warbling Byrdie is right on about the 13 day milestone and there's new research to support that. Turns out the grey matter in our brains actually increases in volume with just two weeks of abstinence. Wow! That's really cool. More is better with brain!

And speaking of brains, once you start getting more of that executive function dusted off from the effects of years and years of drinking, the whole process of healing begins to become less painful and more exciting with every passing day. Our BRAINS are the number one tool we have to make choices and addiction takes choice away by damaging those areas in charge of good decision-making - and then there's all the damage that the drug alcohol does to our dopamine receptors and the rest of the delicate chemical soup we need to function fully and happily in life.

So take comfort in knowing that your brain along with all the other damaged body systems are healing every day and in every way.

The healing formula is basic: 0 drug + time = Healing

Want to accelerate that and turbocharge your healing? Add these three simple and essential actions to your healthy new routine with 100% guaranteed great results:

- eat whole, healthy foods to fuel the machine with the right balance of natural glucose instead of the crazy *ss straight sugar shot you were getting with alcohol

- ramp up the exercise to activate the endorphins and get your happy brain chemicals perking again

- add in daily doses of gratitude to rebuild those damaged dopamine receptors

Okay...I'm going to add a 4th factor in happy healing - reframe the experience.

This isn't about what you are "giving up" (brain damage, liver damage, heart damage, loss of self-respect and self-esteem, depression, anxiety, endangering others, hurting family, friends, employers, strangers, wasted money, wasted years and crapped out colon)

Finding freedom from addiction is all about what you are GETTING:

- healthy brain, respect, time, productivity, peace of mind, happiness, admiration of friends, family, employers and my pugs, bigger bank account, and a chance to really live again - fully. These are great REWARDS, in and of themselves for not drinking, but be sure to also give yourself some tangible treats along the way to mark milestones...Indulge yourself or better yet...indulge yourself AND others with something special...

Harness your power....Light! The land of the FREE is an amazing place to be!!

[patrice]

At what point does it get easier?

Hey thanks all for these great and inspiring posts! So important to keep motivated by how much better we feel!
Xx
Pat

[Rusty]

At what point does it get easier?

Turn:h:h,

Thank you for your brilliant words. I miss your wise and positive posts...CONGRATULATIONS ON OVER 3 YEARS AF!!:goodjob::wd::happy::yay:

Do you think you could dig up one of your lasts posts where you provided a $ amount of the money you saved not drinking...I know it was huge, and you are using it to put your son through law school. It is confirmation for people early in their journeys and affirmation for people who are AF.

Thanks!!!!

[KENSHO]

At what point does it get easier?

Turnagain, please post that in the toolbox. Great!!!!!

[NotHappyHourHappyLife]

At what point does it get easier?

There are a lot of great words of wisdom above .

For me, physically, day 3 was the hardest. I kept my body hydrated with lots of water, ate a night snack of ice cream... went to bed early. However after day 3, the truly hardest challenge is controlling the little demon that sits on my shoulder... the voice that quietly whispers in my ear:

"SEE! You can control your drinking! You've proven to yourself and anyone that cares that you can quit whenever you want to.
So now that you know you can quit, here are the rules:
1. No drinking during the week.
2. No more rum.
3. No more than 3 glasses of wine a night.
4. No more drunk texting.
5. No more drunk driving. Always a Designated Driver!
6. If I drink at night, I must work out the next morning!":bday3:

And at first, I had the self discipline to listen to the rules I set up with my little voice of temptation. I played along with the new rules. I convinced myself that I HAD over reacted, that I COULD moderate. I drifted away from my non-drinking support system (like MWO) and several months later, I realize that I was back to where I was before- only worse. Yes, I do have a problem. :alf:

When I first came here several years ago, one of the Alcohol Free posters (Chief?) said that it was "too much work" to drink. I thought he was wrong, but he was right. Once I realized that by simply not drinking, I didn't have to argue with myself... I didn't have to convince myself that I was right, or wrong... by not drinking, life can be so much simpler. And happier. It's not about a happy hour, it's about a happy life. :l

Patty

[Ginger999]

At what point does it get easier?

STL, Thanks for starting this thread! There is some amazing advice here. My first two weeks were brutal but after that things started to let up some. My sugar cravings were out of this world. During those first two weeks I felt pretty much sick. I envied those peeps that said by day 2 they were feeling great. We are all as individual as a snow flake so be prepared for any or all of what you read here. Just PLEASE don't drink. It does get better and it is worth everything you go through to get there.

[little beagle]

At what point does it get easier?

Wonderful, inspiring posts here. I felt better around 2 weeks, better again around 30 days. My mental health had ups and downs. But honestly after a year I noticed things really clicking. But the biggest thing I noticed from day 1 is that each day I didn't drink felt a million times better then the days after I drank. Even having the flu a couple of weeks ago felt better then a hangover. I have never regreted not drinking and I love my new life. It is worth ever single bit of struggle and work. And honestly the hardest part was over after the first 30 days.

[j-vo]

At what point does it get easier?

Physically, I felt better after about a week. It took everything I had just to get up and go to work. I did nothing for a good while. I woke up, went to work, ate, slept for a good month. I didn't worry about anything else, as I didn't care about anything else.

Mentally, you get stronger daily. It's a gradual build up of all that good stuff in you that Al took away. It's like learning how to walk again. Learning a new language. It takes repetition of these newly learned skills, but once you begin to repeat over and over, once you tackle each new situation or challenge and do it again and again, you master it. Mastering this AF thing will take a good while. I'm not there yet. I'm 4 months yesterday. What I can tell you at 4 months, though, is I feel so much healthier, stronger, more confident, happy, and at peace. I didn't have any of that while drinking. The pros outweigh the cons in so many different ways. You'll see!

[See the Light]

At what point does it get easier?

THANKS

:thanks: Thanks all for some great advice (some of you should write a book maybe )

Hopefully others will be inspired and make the plunge once they know it is possible.

Whether it is 3 days, 13 days or a year, they all sound hard as just the start had been a challenge in the past. I posted this morning in the newbies nest how I struggled last night through my 1st AF night in a while ...I think in retrospect the sugar in those Glutamine chews might have filled a void my brain was searching for. Either way, on to 2 day with your posts fresh in my mind and will revisit these thoughts for motivation frequently.