Huge Black Eye

[Islandgirl]

Hi, this is my first post! :new: I really need to get mylife controlled Saturday, I was throwing a party for my daughter who is going to San Francisco for the summer to do an intership. I have alot of social anxiety which I try to hide well (Vodka). Anyway, I had my first drink BEFORE anyone arrived so that I would be relaxed....Never did stop the whole time. I always had a drink from then on. At the end of the night I caught my foot on a chair by the pool and did a face plant on the cement! I have a HUGE black eye and knot on my head and certainly am MORTIFIED. I need to be AF. I already have all the MWO stuff because I was going to do this before and left it hddien in a drawer. This is bad though, and I need all the support I can get. I am so embarassed and racked with guilt.

[Kitty]

Huge Black Eye

:welcome: Islandgirl,

You've come to the right place, the people here are wonderful and will give you huge support. I can identify with the feelings of guilt you are feeling, and guilt can be very disabling. So try let go of some of the anxiety caused by what happened to you on Saturday for now, and try to concentrate on your future.

I wish you well and see you around,
:l

Kitty

[AAthlete]

Huge Black Eye

IG, rest assured that all of us have had incidents such as yours to be embarrassed about. The story may be different, but the results are the same!!

The past is now in the past, and as long as you try to use it as something to learn from then good can come from it. Use it as one of your motivators to stop drinking, not something to look back on in shame.

[betty boop]

Huge Black Eye

Hi Island Girl & Welcome,

You have come to the right place,

First of all, don't harp on about the past you can't change it, but you can change the future, I know all about the bruises, I used to wake up covered in them and couldn't remember getting them!!!

Keep us posted on your progress ...

BB xx

[4everakid]

Huge Black Eye

Hi Islandgirl,

I empathize and sympathize all at the same time. Sorry to hear about the black eye and the head, sounds painfull. I do not have a daughter, but I certainly do have a large vault packed full of times I only wish I could take back....and also the scars, physical and mental to boot!! About the guilt and embarrassment, I don't know what to say other than it was 'a day in the life of....' kind of thing, and no one will think as much of it as you will. Please don't beat yourself up..I think thats how a lot of us ended up here....too many 'ugh, what the f&$# did I do? I am a horrible person...etc...', which just seems to trigger even more destructive behaviour. You sound like you are definately not a horrible person, only someone who had an accident...if you had it sober would you feel such shame and embarrassment? (although I do understand, it is not just the accident, it is more that you are embarrassed BECAUSE it happened while intoxicated). I am not one to give advcie, as I am also new here, and am just starting out...with a desperate need/want to be AF. But, what I do know is that I can't wait to have, again, way more positive "a day in the life of..." kind of events I am waiting for my supps, etc... but in the meantime am planning to be proactive till it arrives. If you need a motivation buddy, I'm all in, as I could really use someone to help me stay in line and on the path .. (ugh, sounded kinda religious...) But in all seriousness Islandgirl, chin up, you will succeed and maybe in some kind of crazy way, down the road, you will be able to laugh, whole heartedly, at that 'hey, do you remember when..." situation, and fully be able to honestly say 'ya, what a clutz, glad I'm not that girl anymore ....things always seem to happen for a reason, maybe this was the reason for you to open up that secret drawer again...... Good luck Islandgirl...people here are really supportive, so no doubt you will be filled with sunshine

[lushy]

Huge Black Eye

Welcome Islandgirl. So glad you found us. We have all had embarrassing moments that we can only blame ourselves for, but sometimes that it what it takes to force us to make a change. We are here to support you all the way!!!

[sammys]

Huge Black Eye

Welcome Island girl I am glad you are here. It has helped me alot. Hope you stay this time and become part of MWO.

Sammys

[adaptable]

Huge Black Eye

Islandgirl, I'm new here also and before I came here I fell on my face also. I went to a party with my husbands work buddies in the middle of the afternoon. Before we even got to the restaurant I had knocked back a few and fell. I went outside to smoke a cigarette and fell down a whole flight of stairs and messed up my face pretty bad. It was really embarrassing. Of course everyone knew about it because someone had to go into the restaurant and announce it over everyone. I’m glad you are here, you’ll get a lot of support.

[ducky]

Huge Black Eye

We can all add our special moments...lol. Throwing up in the street after an office Xmass party (in front of colleagues) is one of mine; crashing a moped and almost bleeding to death in Mexico is another. I could go on.

Forgive yourself and use it to move on!

Welcome.

[goingsobermum]

Huge Black Eye

IslandGirl,
We should all get together and write a book of all the worst momments of our drinking careers, as you see you are not alone here. The sups will work best if you get them out of the drawer, you've done step 1 posting here so I guess that is step 2.
Welcome to MWO

[retteacher]

Huge Black Eye

I. G. : We all have our stories. I feel it's good to remember them at times in order to counteract the thoughts that say: "Oh go ahead & drink. What's the harm?" Mine are:
-broken tooth (expensive repair).
-chewed up hearing aid by dog (carelessly left around by drunk me). Expensive replacement.
-at least 3 - 4 throwing up bouts (that I can remember). One so bad, my husband wanted to hospitalize me...doc was called.
-plenty of black-outs.
You're not alone. We've all done things we regret. I try to put them behind me except to remember them as learning tools & ways to prevent yet another binge. By the way, I've done dumb things while sober. I'm not happy about them, but I'm not filled w/shame & guilt either. I can get past them much more easily. Keep moving forward, Mary

[bon vivant]

Huge Black Eye

Islandgirl,

You have come to the right place. Stay with it. Strength comes with the each new day.
Alway be glad to have realized this and then be confidant that nothing more will happen.

bon vivant

[gzj03]

Huge Black Eye

Just have to get it out

I posted last year and got a way from it. Reading your posts gives me some where to belong. I started the week not drinking and feeling like myself again-strong and in charge. I vowed to stop drinking for a week after over doing it at a family dinner and being mortified in front of my neices and nephews. My conviction to not drink made me happy and secure. Went to dinner with a nice guy, a recovering alcoholic who is a good friend and had 2 drinks. Felt good and normal. Went out the next night after work and had 3. Feel so hung over; called in to change my day off and my manager told me what a mistake that was and to never do it again. I felt scolded and I'm 48. My 27 year old guy friend that I've been helping get over his last girlfriend said he needed time for himself and didn't want to answer my calls . This is after sending him books to read on breaking up and treating him to a nice dinner. Then I got 2 calls from collection agencies for dr. bills I never received. I feel fragile, afraid, shaky, panicky and unloved. All for what? Any words of advice?

[amisssue]

Huge Black Eye

I

Please can someone help me to, my husband died 4 months ago after an accident at work, and I cant get through the nights without drinking heavily. Dont know how to start a new thread, sorry for butting in on this one Amisssuex









to drink then , but now Im really losing the plot dont know how to start a new thread,

[bon vivant]

Huge Black Eye

Please hang in there!

Welcome amisssue,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss! My mother lost my father whom she was married to for 19 years to a car accident. She grieved by turning to the bottle. She was a professional school teacher and it was the most horrible time for her. She overcame it, but it cost her five good years of her life. Stay here and you will get help.

Lots of people to encourage and give guidance.

bon vivant