Hello Everyone British Expat Living in Germany starting mission today

[wyldetymes]

Hi WT,
Little steps not large leaps works and I know someone whose been in rehab 10 times and still goes back on the booze about a month after coming out.
It's all about re-educating your mind slowly. One day you'll think I've cracked it!
I agree with Mick, forgot to mention it but a diary is a must, write down every unit and also write down how you felt the next day.
Don't know about Germany but in Blighty the units are printed on the bottle at the back in small writing, I think it's compulsory.
I look back at my old diary and think "god I was in a right mess wasn't I".
Where are you from in England?

Not what the others think Lasha - cold turkey for me your plan has been squashed by hi command

But thanks you were really helpful in your advice and I took your plan and modified it - its a good plan Lasha
God bless
I come from sheffield and I have worked in Sri Lanka
all the best

[wyldetymes]

James I am so sorry to hear about your wife's accident. That is heartbreaking. I hope that you get the red tape sorted out soon, so that you can get some detox help at the Klinik. I'm new here too, I am a Londoner living in Ireland. Good luck with it and feel free to chat to me. Best wishes, Marie

Thank you and god bless

[wyldetymes]

Hi wyldetymes,

How's the taper going? I read your thread with interest, I'm a newb here too, and recently (Christmas Day) quit after a month of stabilising and reducing/tapering. I never thought I'd be able to do it. I posted some thoughts about the experience just now; they might be useful to you:

https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?90828-Stabilisation

Best of luck with the process...if I can help in any way please holler. And I agree with the above. Quitting is the best way you could honour your wife.

Take care mate.

Thank you - Tapering over CT for me now

[wyldetymes]

hi wildthymes..Ive got to agree with eloise...dont think for one minute..af comes gift wrapped to your door wrapped in a pretty nice bow...mate you have got to work at it...yes it is a huge life change ..and thats what it is..not a fad or a faze but a complete way of life..cant comment on your journey and the planning into how to drink ...seems there was a lot of thought went into that ...wine beer ,minature etc..would it not have been more prudent to think ok how can I do this without booze?take a book,pencil paper ,bottle of pop,even a bottle of af wine??* (it was a miniature measured out exactly 1 unit only to be taken at the the exact tapering schedule say 3pm or something not a bottle of chianti)

You & eloise have your wish I'll show you my seriousness no more taper no more bottles of wine Cold Turkey - you both think Im weak and spineless well Im not I certainly don't want my "little friend" - I gave up on the anniversary of my wife's death and you both trivialise it by assuming Im weak - well Im not Im stopping tapering
"would it not have been more prudent to think ok how can I do this without booze?take a book,pencil paper ,bottle of pop"

I don't need any of that sh!t pencil ??? I have my insurance papers to read and Im going to a serious meeting not a walk in park

NOw Im stopping I don;t need to see the insurance
so thanks for the support chaps

[NoSugar]

Are you ok, WT? All of us want you to be able to safely and surely accomplish your goal. What you need to do depends on your health and how much alcohol you were consuming. Do you have a friend who could be with you or who you could call if you have problems?

[wyldetymes]

Are you ok, WT? All of us want you to be able to safely and surely accomplish your goal. What you need to do depends on your health and how much alcohol you were consuming. Do you have a friend who could be with you or who you could call if you have problems?

Thnk so much - no I have no friend and no GP - its just me and the chickens and don;t worry about my health Im going to respect my wife and forget my health Im going to AF for her memory and myself _ i was trying to taper but it takes too long and is too inconvenient. I will stop now this very evening

Thank you and god bless

[wyldetymes]

So I had come to say I accelerated my taper a bit and am a bit on edge due to the withdrawal - but its all moot now.
Im just going to bite the bullet and who knows what will happen next ? Cold turkey for me now - so I may not be able to post for a while - Im sure to get the shakes etc i some times got them in tapering. Im am very on edge tonight not slept last night. Hoped to get a bit of moral support not easy being alone all day and living to a clock

I will try to post when its over - I do hope Im not found on the floor by the postman - wish me luck once more into the breach

thanks for the advice in the begining and all the kind posts

god bless I hope this works without tears
Bye for Now

[NoSugar]

WT, if you experience anything really scary, please call for emergency help. You shouldn't have to do this alone. I think there are alcohol help hotlines you could call, too, for support and advice.

[wyldetymes]

WT, if you experience anything really scary, please call for emergency help. You shouldn't have to do this alone. I think there are alcohol help hotlines you could call, too, for support and advice.

Its all in a foreign language - my wife was german she did all the paperwork - I worked in IT english all the time my german is not so good unfortunately - I was only tapering to get going on the anniversary of her death so much red tape from the insurance comapny
Its this way or the highway unfortunately - thanks for your concerns - but im bit tense no sleep and i have just blown a gasket

God bless

[NoSugar]

Take care of yourself, WT. I'm sorry you are doing this alone. I will be thinking of you. I hope you keep posting and let us know how things are going and that you are ok.

[wyldetymes]

Take care of yourself, WT. I'm sorry you are doing this alone. I will be thinking of you. I hope you keep posting and let us know how things are going and that you are ok.

Thank you - I agree better with company - but needs must I will post when I can
I spilt honey on my keyboard - bit difficut

god bless

[Mick]

wildthymes.....your comments

You & eloise have your wish I'll show you my seriousness no more taper no more bottles of wine Cold Turkey - you both think Im weak and spineless well Im not I certainly don't want my "little friend" - I gave up on the anniversary of my wife's death and you both trivialise it by assuming Im weak - well Im not Im stopping tapering
"would it not have been more prudent to think ok how can I do this without booze?take a book,pencil paper ,bottle of pop"

I don't need any of that sh!t pencil ??? I have my insurance papers to read and Im going to a serious meeting not a walk in park

NOw Im stopping I don;t need to see the insurance
so thanks for the support chaps

firstly my wish was to help you...certainly not take a pile of crap like that as a reply..you put words like trivialise weak,spineless and assume in your "reply"..since when did you ever learn to second guess thoughts???
I also suggested a book/pencil in order to write things down on your journey about how you felt..not to draw silly pictures or colour it in!!it worked for me and also others I know...I take your reply as a personal insult,but hey thats life...I wish you well in whatever way you decide or what path you choose to take.

[shambles70]

WT, not sure where you are/were in your taper, but if it was working for you, it seems crazy to stop it midway, especially to prove a point. I don't think anyone here anyone on here wants to do anything other than help you. At times that's going to be a bit challenging. Look at it this way...at the moment you are in a very vulnerable state, physically, mentally and emotionally. It's clear you felt attacked by what Mick and Eloise wrote, and now you're countering in an attempt to protect that vulnerability. It's natural, especially for alcoholics. But I don't think you were being attacked. When I was reducing and stabilising, I was misinterpreting things people were saying left right and centre. My girlfriend would tease me and I would think 'how could she say something so hurtful?', when all she was doing was trying to make me smile. Your psychological skin is very fragile atm. Take a step back when this happens and think 'Am I reading this right or is there a possibility I am misinterpreting the situation?'

My advice? Stick with the taper. With no support network around you and no access to medical help, it is the best option, especially if you are experiencing the symptoms you describe. Go out and buy some Vitamin B1 (Thiamine) and a strong B complex and take 3 a day. You need them. Eat properly. Use the time between drinks to prepare good food. Tag an extra half hour onto the time between drinks every now and then. Create little victories for yourself. Be kind to yourself.

FWIW, about 2 weeks into my taper, I had a meeting with the psychiatrist which was 1 1/2 hours away by public transport. (I wasn't in any state to drive myself there) and my keyworker suggested I take a thermos of wine on the bus with me to keep me stable. I'm not sure how an insurance company would take you rocking up to the meeting reeking of booze though.

Let us know how it's going.

[satz123]

oh dear, wyldetymes- you are eventually going to have to make a commitment to yourself to stop all this. You are not going to self-destruct without alcohol in your system. Yes, it is a huge change for you, you will have to change your lifestyle but it is a choice. Your choice to decide what you want for yourself and your future.
Right now you are having trouble coping with the idea of a meeting, a short journey without your best friend. I am pretty sure that if you look at this statement objectively you will be very surprised at where you are in your thinking.

WTF !!!! - harsh !!!

WT : I can say nothing that has not been said above by Shambles , NS & Molly
Sending strength and hope that you are ok

[Eloise]

wildthymes.....your comments

You & eloise have your wish I'll show you my seriousness no more taper no more bottles of wine Cold Turkey - you both think Im weak and spineless well Im not I certainly don't want my "little friend" - I gave up on the anniversary of my wife's death and you both trivialise it by assuming Im weak - well Im not Im stopping tapering
"would it not have been more prudent to think ok how can I do this without booze?take a book,pencil paper ,bottle of pop"

I don't need any of that sh!t pencil ??? I have my insurance papers to read and Im going to a serious meeting not a walk in park

NOw Im stopping I don;t need to see the insurance
so thanks for the support chaps

firstly my wish was to help you...certainly not take a pile of crap like that as a reply..you put words like trivialise weak,spineless and assume in your "reply"..since when did you ever learn to second guess thoughts???
I also suggested a book/pencil in order to write things down on your journey about how you felt..not to draw silly pictures or colour it in!!it worked for me and also others I know...I take your reply as a personal insult,but hey thats life...I wish you well in whatever way you decide or what path you choose to take.

Thank you for your post Mick.
I don't often have too much to say and in this case it appears I said entirely the wrong thing. It was never my intention to infer I think you are weak wydetymes or to hurt your feelings in anyway, ever.
This is not my role in life, nor to I judge people. I was trying to be helpful and sincerely wish you the best on your journey.
I do understand that life is not as you wish it were, naturally.
I think if anyone can empathize with your current situation it is me, but you wouldn't know that because we do not know each other at all.
Wishing you the best.