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1 year AF Free and looking back !

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    #1

    1 year AF Free and looking back !

    Hello All,

    One year ! Yippee .. its time to rejoice and celebrate.

    I owe to all and everyone of you especially the old timers for all the wonderful support you have given. Today i did something which till an year back I KNEW can't be done ... stay sober for an YEAR ! Thanks GOD I was wrong ... I did it. I climbed the mountain, I crossed the ocean, ran the marathon ...

    Its been a great journey and I must say it was hard ... REAL hard. For I was drinking for past 12 to 15 years. Last 8 years or so on daily basis. Past 5 years HEAVY drinking ... today I look back and introspect why I started drinking :

    - to over come shyness
    - to have a sense of party especially while travelling
    - to fill for a missing companion / soulmate etc
    - to kill the pain / depression / anxiety
    - to pass time
    so on a so forth

    it turns out I was all wrong ! ... AL was simply make them worse. It was no friend, just giving a false sense of party.

    My lowest point was when I was in hotel room alone, surrounded by bottles, awake in morning at about 5 AM unable to sleep ...

    What a mess - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?73752-What-a-mess
    What a mess I have made my life into. Guys I am new here .... Woke up at 5 am with dry throat and lack of sleep due to excess drinking beers yesterday night. It's been now more than 10 years of daily drinking 8 to 10 pints of beers everyday. My work which involves travelling all across have made thinks worse . Alcohol is my


    Went AF free for about a month or so then thought I can moderate :

    hate my self - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?76732-hate-my-self
    I hate myself for thinking I can control AL. thinking I can Moderate it. I started my drinks on my US trip and thinking I can control it. And since then where ever I have traveled I have waited for an an opportunity to pop open beer cans. Landed home after 3 days of traveling and drinking and went to the usual bar drank.


    then I again restarted 60 days I was strong and here is my post on windmill

    60 days AF : My alcoholic brain is like windmill - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?86775-60-days-AF-My-alcoholic-brain-is-like-windmill
    Day 60 : as I complete this mile stone I saw several documentaries and read a lot about brain chemistry and it's relation to addiction and to make things simple I thought of putting it this way I request all experts on this site to correct it and add where you feel I am wrong in imagine or may add. Let's imagine our brain is


    Few posts from the journey I have in toolbox :

    first time 30 days
    Tool box - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box&p=1426629#post1426629
    Here is a list of tools that have helped me maintain my sobriety. This is short and incomplete, help us all out and add your sobriety tools to the list. Make a written list, write down: The reason/s you want to be al free. How bad physically and mentally you feel after an adventure with al. (be graphic) A list of your


    Second time 90 days AF Free : post about magic dungeon
    Tool box - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box&p=1504900#post1504900
    Here is a list of tools that have helped me maintain my sobriety. This is short and incomplete, help us all out and add your sobriety tools to the list. Make a written list, write down: The reason/s you want to be al free. How bad physically and mentally you feel after an adventure with al. (be graphic) A list of your


    90 Days AF Free :
    Tool box - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box&p=1525235#post1525235
    Here is a list of tools that have helped me maintain my sobriety. This is short and incomplete, help us all out and add your sobriety tools to the list. Make a written list, write down: The reason/s you want to be al free. How bad physically and mentally you feel after an adventure with al. (be graphic) A list of your


    Sober mountain Peak !
    Tool box - My Way Out Forums
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/showthread.php?24253-Tool-box&p=1556156&highlight=rahulthesweet#post1556156
    Here is a list of tools that have helped me maintain my sobriety. This is short and incomplete, help us all out and add your sobriety tools to the list. Make a written list, write down: The reason/s you want to be al free. How bad physically and mentally you feel after an adventure with al. (be graphic) A list of your


    Its good to look back and see the hard time I have been thru. But my advice to new bies ... if a creep, low life me can do it ... then so can you !!

    So how I did ? Well stay on MWO ... support is very important.
    Rahul
    --------------------------------------------
    Rewiring my brain ... done ...
    Updating brain "attitude" firmware ... done ...
    Rebooting ... done ...
    Restarted program called "Life" ... started successfully ...
    Tags: 1 year af free
    #2
    Good for you Rahul! I have always enjoyed reading your posts and reflections and look forward to many more!! Thanks for the reminders of your journey :-)

    Comment

      #3
      Rahul - Congratulations on one year! You've written some great reflections and have a way with descriptive visual posts that have made me feel like I'm there! You sound great and full of renewed perspective. Keep on sharing your insight here and enjoy this tremendous accomplishment!
      Last edited by Resolve; February 21, 2015, 08:41 AM.

      Comment

        #4


        Rahul!
        Quitting and staying quit isn't easy, its learning a whole new way of thinking. It's accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
        Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
        Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

        Comment

          #5
          Congrats on one year, Rahul! Awesome ! On to year 2!:welldone:
          Kicked AL to the curb November 9, 2014!

          Comment

            #6
            Just to add to the congratulations that I enjoy your posts too and thanks for your honesty here

            Comment

              #7
              Thank you so much for that! So proud of you! B
              All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
              Tool Box
              Newbie's Nest

              Comment

                #8
                Rahul, I am so proud of you! Your posts are among my favorites. You put words to things that I have felt but couldn't describe! I am grateful for your friendship and to be in a pack with you. xoxo:hug:
                AF since January 7, 2014 *Never, never, never give up. ~ Winston Churchill*

                Comment

                  #9
                  CONGRATS ON 1 YEAR AF RAHUL!!!! :welldone::sohappy:
                  AF since 03/26/09
                  NF since 05/19/09
                  Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    I couldn't be more pleased to read your post and want to say loud and clear you are no creep lowlife Rahul.
                    You are a smart, articulate and insightful soul. God bless!

                    And it is very cool you took the time to put this post together for yourself and others who imagine perhaps this cannot be done.
                    I too thought I couldn't quit for good. After 9 months I cannot get my head around WHY I didn't stop the foolishness sooner? I feel so much better, in spite of the occasional anxiety, than I have felt in years. Life isn't perfect and still full of problems I have trouble understanding, but I can see through it. It is no more 'all or nothing' thinking. And there is the light ahead telling me to 'hang on' this feeling will pass. And it does. It comes back, but passes again too. Sending you a wholehearted congratulations and looking forward to reading how things evolve in year two!
                    Last edited by Eloise; February 22, 2015, 09:19 AM.
                    (AF since 17 May 2014) 2 years 5 months sober

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Congratulations Rahul you are well on your way to living up to your namesake: "conqueror of all miseries".
                      Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that but simply growth, We are happy when we are growing.

                      William Butler Yeats

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Great job Rahul! It has taken a lot of work but you have done it! Stay the course my friend.
                        The easy way to quit drinking?:

                        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow0lr63y4Mw

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Congratulation.. You deserve a reward for your accomplishments. Keep it up!

                          :welldone: :thumbsup:

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Thanks all of you.

                            Eliose thanks for the kids word and blessings , but I still am a creep. Long way to go in be coming a being person.. But am working on it.

                            Jane, Byrdlady, Tgaf, lav thanks all for wishes.

                            Great Neon abcowboy
                            Rahul
                            --------------------------------------------
                            Rewiring my brain ... done ...
                            Updating brain "attitude" firmware ... done ...
                            Rebooting ... done ...
                            Restarted program called "Life" ... started successfully ...

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Geez, Rahul not sure why you are so hard on yourself?
                              Makes me a bit sad to be honest. Please try and look at the bright side, you have come so far. How is the sugar free challenge coming along? When I need something sweet I turn to raisins these days. I started thinking maybe I should take it easy on the L-Glut and look for natural sugars. Probably better to just eat grapes but they are not so tasty this time of year.
                              Anyhow, I personally feel very optimistic when I see your posts and how you are looking at the reality of your life and figuring out what to do to improve yourself. Very inspirational! Happy Friday friend!
                              (AF since 17 May 2014) 2 years 5 months sober

                              Comment

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