My intentions! (R lack there of??)

[Gilf]

Not sure where to post this so I'm just going to do it here.

Had the pleasure of waking up this morning (my day 4!) to a very 'interesting' private message from a 'Senior member'. Apparently my picture & my user name has a direct correlation to whether I am serious about my intentions being on this forum & finally asking for help? Basically saying I'm being deceitful in my intent by having my user name & picture! I have spent a lot of my life swallowing hurt & not being honest with my feelings with others so having promised myself to not do it any longer, so.......

Firstly, I just want to point out that I will NOT be either changing my name or my pictures (unless I feel the urge to do so). Both of these things mean something to me & TBH I think that no one has the right to tell me whether they approve or not.

Secondly, I have been on this site before over time, I have come & gone, I have looked & read, I have tried my hardest to be honest with myself (which is why I'm here) so being chastised like a child is not only not productive , it's down right disrespectful frankly. I do not think just because someone has managed to stay 'sober' for longer than others that it automatically makes you a 'better' person than someone else with a drink problem with an automatic insight into their journey.

Thirdly, I am a grown woman & I will NOT be bullied or berated by ANYONE, and if anyone reads my posts they will get the jist that I do that to myself enough. That's why I'm here to learn to be a better, more authentic me.

Lastly, if you do not like what I have to say, block me or don't read what I put up. Try to live up to your own user name & re-read your own quote that you use in your posts. Maybe focusing on your own intentions might be more productive than questioning mine.

The majority of people on here have offered me nothing but support & I am thankful for that. I will get through today (day 4), despite having a good cry this morning. My integrity & intentions are my own & I am not going to be side tracked by anyone else's supposed opinion of me.......

IMO there is a life & a way to live that life for everyone! We are all different, sure that's the point?

So here's a quote from me......
As you slide up and down the banisters of life, May the splinters never point the wrong way!!!!:cuss:

[Mr Vervill]

Good on you GILF. We are all here for our own reasons, finding, struggling for our own way out.

[Byrdlady]

Gilf, ahhh.....Hate Mail! You know you have arrived when you get it! So settle in and make yourself comfortable. You have as much right to be here as ANYONE! If I can help you in any way, I'm a click away! GREAT work on Day 4! Hugs, Byrdie

[lizker]

Whoa is all I can say. Good for standing up for yourself. Your pain is your own and no one has a right to take it as far as this person did...stay close and don't allow anything to derail the good work you have started.

[Gilf]

Was very upset this morning, but I'm grand now! Thanks for the shoutout both of you! So pathetic tbh! Next time I will post any bulls**t sent to me in a pm on the public forum for everyone to see for themselves. No keyboard warrior is going to dictate to me! I'm almost through work (1st day back in a week) & I'm not being funny but the anger has spurred me on! Go raibh maith agat araon (thank you both!)

[Gilf]

Thanks lizker!

[Eloise]

Oh my goodness Gilf, I am very sorry about this.
Really, WHY do people go out of there way to be nasty? I just do not understand it.
PLEASE do not let some weirdo drive you away.
You belong here as much as anyone else and I have to say when I was first here many years ago I got scared off by some nasty humans a couple of times. All this did was delay my return to a sober sane life. So, make sure you block that person from sending you anymore negative messages.

[Gilf]

Thanks so much for that! I actually am not gonna block anyone, but I will post anymore inappropriate messages! Got my back up now! Good for my own fight so hopefully finish my day 4 on a more positive note!

[starty]

Do NOT let anyone bring you down. It is definitely the minority here who are negative. And you say it was a senior member? Whoever it was should be ashamed of themselves

[red67]

Well, I love your avatar and your username makes me smile. Welcome back!

[available]

Gilf sorry about the vile message. Name and shame is always a good option i think. If you want to send horrible messages then you surely cant be ashamed of said opinion expressed. I personally am not better than any person on here, i still struggle sometimes but the struggles have become less and less as time goes on. Those early days are the pits and grab all the support you can. Feed off your anger to become more determined not to drink to show the arsehole they are wrong, not that you need to.

[j-vo]

Stay here at MWO and stay strong! Words...Just this week, I witnessed how bad words can bite someone in the ass. It ain't pretty, and I do believe in karma. So, just shake it off and refocus on yourself. 99 percent of MWO'ers are awesome. Maybe 99.9 percent! We are here for you.

[Overit-still]

That is just too bad. I would like to defend whoever wrote you and say that they were just trying to "help" you but at the same time cannot understand how ANY of us can judge another.

If that's the case, I'm the worst hypocrite ever with my name of "overit" that I picked 3 years ago and as of 16 or so days ago, was still drinking.

Sometimes we do very stupid things when we think we can be kept anonymous.

I'm sorry your day started out that way. Just get through this day.

[abcowboy]

I didn’t have a very good day yesterday, and I’m not enjoying this one either…..

This is going to be “tough love” as tough as they come, but it’s honest. I didn’t send the pm, but it very well could have been me! I think I need to take a break from MWO for a while, maybe I’m just taking things to literal and personal.

You see, I suffered from a pornography addiction as well as alcohol addiction! They went hand in hand to me, you drink alone and watch porn, that was what I’d become. Through the grace of God I’ve overcome both my addictions and become a better person for it! But Google “Gilf”, I don’t have to, I know what it represents. Do I need a sexy, cheeky assed leprechaun named “Gilf” each and every day to remind me of the guy I used to be, I think not! Maybe some growing up is in order for some grown ups. For the life of me I can’t think of one good reason to have a name and avatar like that, it sure wasn’t considerate of people who face multiple addictions! I try and support everyone, and all of their addictions, but it’s hard to take serious a user name and avatar like that! I am offended by it.

I hope this gives you all some food for thought before you choose a user name or an avatar, just stop and think for a second who you might be affecting before you pick it……

Merry Christmas all and best of luck to everyone…..

[Overit-still]

Cowboy-Thanks for making us think about some real issues. Please don't leave.