The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

[Neo]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

I found food helps the most. Most if not all my past relapses have been done when I'm hungry . Now Im not talking preservative sugary foods. Something good.

One tool you can use is that if you're spending $30/day on alcohol addiction, why not go down and buy your favourite meal from a restaurant or stock up to $30/day of great food when starting out

[Marylou123]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Good advice Neo - I think a great meal is comforting as well as a tool to fight cravings. I'm finding that the sugar pull is very strong for me right now (3 yrs AF). I always feel better when I eat well, and regret a sugar binge. Kindda like drinking. It's almost blueberry season here - that will help a lot.

[mario]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Sometimes when folks have a slip/relapse they are ashamed to come back here or other fellowships, They develop the old inferior complex & put themselves down as no good or not good enough, Which is pure *********, Don't know how many slips & broken promises I had & gave before it clicked with me. Nobody entirely escapes temptation, you must be ready for it when it comes, You must always have defences up when going into vulnerable areas (for you), That is why for me I still use the tools that worked for me every morning & every night & in between if I get the chance.. Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

[Neo]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Dead right Mario, I crashed big time this easter and the guilt and shame at 3am yesterday wasn't fun, however that is why I keep the backup valium. nothing worse than anxiety so bad you can't sleep . I could stay off the forum , keep kicking myself or Just get back into it and keep trying .I know by the end of this week I will be feeling good about myself if i follow through on my goals even if at this current moment I feel like the biggest piece of crap

[kuya]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

I have read this thread a couple times and pondered the question 'exactly what IS the difference between a slip and a relapse?'

It cannot be time or amount drunk since there are so many variations. I have even seen it written that ONE DRINK puts you back to square one.

I continue to be astounded by the power of the mind and have concluded that the difference between a slip and a relapse is belief.

People who fall off the wagon and drink and then go back to their previous drinking (and often worse) seem to BELIEVE this is an inevitable consequence of 'slipping'. They BELIEVE they are 'hopeless drunks', 'useless failures' etc.

They also seem often times to have been people for whom sobriety was forced upon them by others as a last chance. This creates continual stress and therefore increases the desire to drink!

Those people who slip (and some do many, many, many times before achieving long term sobriety) seem to have a totally different mindset. They BELIEVE that they WILL get and stay sober at some time, even if it is not THIS time.

So, in my definition;

A relapse occurs when a person who believes themselves to be 'a drunk' loses sobriety.

A slip occurs when a person who believes themselves to be 'in recovery' drinks alcohol.

The amount or time drinking again is pretty irrelevant (in terms of their chances of regaining sobriety) it is their core belief in who they are in the first place that seperates them.

[empyr3al]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

I preach this so people don't go over the edge with one slip. I have been through all three stages at one point or another over the past number of years. Currently I'm in a position that evolved past a slip, so I wont say much on the forums unless it can help someone. I signed divorce papers, got let go from a job that was going to be my future for me. I have lots of money but the pressure is high. I aligned well with the job; there just wasnt enough work for me. I'll be okay, but its gonna hurt at this point. I've done this many times and I have my appts booked to help me come down. So its only been a couple days but everytime a lapse/slip/relapse happens for an alcoholic the consequences are harder to deal with. I was trying to over drink my drugs so my body is addicted, the mental part alcohol or a drug can't fix. Therapy or talk therapy is my solution to where I'm at. Physically opinions on whether I should use BAC as I hear it causes little problems during withdrawal or the "go to" Diazepam. I dont suffer (yet) from seizures and each drug comes at a cost, but so has my behaviour. A week of emotional insanity and I'm now at a position I havent been in 6 months. Gonna hurt. So talking about slip, lapse, relapse. Slip is you had a drink and regret it. Lapse is a day of using. Relapse is more than one day. The entire time we are aware of what is happening (atleast if you are on drugs like I am, you know what you are doing is stupid). So because I wasn't smart; I assume....not sure yet I will suffer physical withdrawal.

[abcowboy]

There's some pretty good info here and a workbook to help with relapse and relapse prevention, it's a good read for anyone in my opinion...

Be Ready To Succeed | The Relapse Prevention Plan

[Guitarista]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Abfab. That's a great read indeed. A relapse prevention book that's 260 pages in PDF format...... free! 2007, but still relevant today as this is an age old thing.

Thanks friend.

[abcowboy]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Ya G-man, what do you get for free anymore lol. My counsellor recommended it to me and I still go back and read it a bit...

[Lost Soul]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

There's some pretty good info here and a workbook to help with relapse and relapse prevention, it's a good read for anyone in my opinion...

Be Ready To Succeed | The Relapse Prevention Plan

Bookmarked - thanks ABC

[catch22]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Hi abc, thought I bump this thread, it always good to read, and share my experience.
Many times when I join here in 2007 I relapse so many times and could not get it, struggling toomuch with the craving.
In 2013 I slip had 3 years AF, in my life I was going through a lot of changes, separated from my ex, my partner was going through a operation on his back spine and didn't know what the outcome was going to be if he would end up in a wheel chair, I was struggling with money and going through a bad time & stressed out. My friend helped me & give me money to buy food, and that night I thought I would just have one bottle of wine, but that was not enough, in the middle of the night I when out again got another then some skol super, and strong cider.
Like you said you need to get help straight away and lucky I did and was taken to a meeting straight away, it did mess with my head for about a few months.
A few weeks ago I was suffering with the HALT a was very aware of it. I was looking after my family dog that was very sick with cancer and my daughter was on holiday with her partner, her dad & his partner & my son. I was on my own in the flat my partner had stay at home with our cats the dog went right down hill after 5 days she would not eating I could not eat sleep because I was making sure she was alright, I felt lonely and very angry with my daughter because they said our family dog Trixy had to be put to sleep my daughter said no wait til I come home from my holiday the dog was suffering real bad ,in the end two days before my daughter come home the vet insisted the dog is suffering too much my daughter agree in the end to put Trixy to sleep. The thing is I was getting very angry . I still feel a bit of resentment of the situation my ex made things worst as well.
But thank God I know the meaning of the HALT, my partner was worried and couldn't wait til i got home, after that I have upped my meetings. May be that why I come back on here.
Its always good to share your own experience it a good reminder reading your post. Thank you
X Catch22 X

[abcowboy]

Thought I'd bump this up for [MENTION=23999]moonking[/MENTION], might be something in here for you...

[abcowboy]

Bumping this up for [MENTION=11925]TribalRose[/MENTION]

[TribalRose]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Powerful. Sunday is my day of worship.

Will be blunt. Waiting on the ABC store to open tomorrow.

Maybe I will change my mind during the night.

Rose

[TribalRose]

Re: The Difference Between a Slip and a Relapse

Didn't go to ABC store. Cleaned up my yard...grocery store essentials. Toast & coffee. Trying not to beat my head against the wall.