Day One of the Rest of my Life

[Eloise]

Just want to comment that my husband wasn't so great in the beginning either, but with time he decided it was a very good thing I was doing. So, he quit cigarettes and now hardly ever drinks. I didn't ask him to do any of it either, he decided for himself.
Have some faith 20/20, you ARE doing the right thing and no it won't be easy, but you will get the hang of it!

[20/20]

Day 5

Hi Madonmehndi, NoSugar, Eloise & all the MWOers ........... Day 5 wrapping up for me!!! :sohappy:

Madonmehndi - CONGRATS on 3 days. Seriously - just getting going is such an accomplishment! I'm here with and for you. We can do this!!
Which app are you using please? I can't remember what mine is called but it has quotes too [/QUOTE]
The app is just called "Quotes".. It has topics you can select as to the types of quotes you want to receive. I really like it. Is it okay if I call you Madonme. I have to come up with shortened names for my new friends! I am one that always gives people nick names!!:exclaim:

NoSugar - It's such a strange mind shift for me. I have spent years "feeling sorry for myself" that I am "that person" that shouldn't drink. When I read Byrdladys post ... a change snapped in my head. My thinking changed on a dime. I am going to re-read her post every day so that my excitement doesn't fade.

All day today - I just felt excited. EVEN WHEN I HAD A "I want a drink" (really IT wants a drink). I snapped my band on my arm (A technique that aihfl suggested) and just shook my head and said out loud "NO"! Instead of being frustrated with myself for even thinking it .... I reminded myself that THOUGHT HABITS won't go away overnight. I'm not sure if it's true cravings that POP into my mind .... or if its more HABIT. Either way - I'm catching myself in the thought before it becomes a full blown plan. I know myself well enough to know there is only a few second window that happens once the thought turns into a drinking plan. I can throw out "good intentions" faster than the speed of light. So I MUST LEARN HOW TO STOP THAT THOUGHT IN IT'S TRACKS! My method for now is to hear and repeat "IT wants a drink". "I don't drink". IT is the Alcohol beast in my head!!!! :egad:

Eloise - Thank you for that info about your hubs. I will be patient with him. Once he sees that this is not a "short term" abstinence (Like I'm on a diet or something) I will have a heart to heart with him. Not a fight about it.

A little more about me:
I quit drinking 8 years ago for 18 months. Bottom line on my fall -- I really felt I had this "thing" licked. I took it for granted. I stopped communicating with those who helped me. I let ONE event (A class reunion) unravel 18 months of freedom. I was never able to get back up. Oh, I would have a few days every once in awhile. Maybe once in the last 8 years I actually went 3 weeks. But no longer than that. Having a background of a great run of Abstinence can make it even more depressing. That voice in your head that says ..... You will never make it long term .... etc. etc. - The voice that is speaking from experience is a hard voice to discredit. So I am working very hard to tell myself - "That experience will come back to help you" It will help you to NEVER take being abstinent for granted. I know that it is as good as TODAY - and TODAY is all I have.

Another quote that just came up on a different App I'm using (App called habitseed .... it's a really cool app for tracking changing a habit .... this one being ALCOHOL!!!)

"The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself".
MARK CO CAINE

Okay ...... off to get some dinner.

[madonmehndi]

Well done on Day 5 :welldone: You are doing so well, and you sound so upbeat and cheerful, I need to snap out of my mood!!!! You can call me Mads if you like ('I love Death Becomes Her' so that would make me laugh and would be quicker to type lol) My app is called Sober Time and is is in the Google Play store on my phone, it gives you milestones like one day, 3 days, a week etc... when you have done that many AF and it gives you a different quote each time you open the app. The Hypno thing I have is also an app, it is Quit drinking with Andrew Johnson and it is very good, I like his voice, he has a scottish accent and sounds lovely
Hope you are having a good day.

[paulywogg]

You're doing beautifully 20/20

[20/20]

Thanks Mads & Pauly!!! Day 6 today!

Found something helpful I need to document before I lose it:

PREP

P - Polite Response "Thanks for offering, something cold to drink like an iced tea sounds great"
R - Reason for Refusal " Nothing alcoholic for me, I'm following Dr's orders on some medical issues."
E - Enforcement "I wouldn't want to have a reaction right here!"
P - Polite Invite for support "I appreciate your understanding" or "I'm going to be on this regime for awhile"


Going to memorize this one!!!!!!!

[NoSugar]

I reminded myself that THOUGHT HABITS won't go away overnight. I'm not sure if it's true cravings that POP into my mind .... or if its more HABIT.

After the physical part of quitting is over, addiction is in large part a really bad habit. This book addresses all kinds of addictions/habits in a way you might find useful: The Little Book of Big Change: The No-Willpower Approach to Breaking Any Habit: Amy Johnson PhD, Mark Howard PhD: 978162625231: Amazon.com: Books

I like your PREP plan - nice and simple, which helps!

[20/20]

After the physical part of quitting is over, addiction is in large part a really bad habit. This book addresses all kinds of addictions/habits in a way you might find useful: The Little Book of Big Change: The No-Willpower Approach to Breaking Any Habit: Amy Johnson PhD, Mark Howard PhD: 978162625231: Amazon.com: Books

I like your PREP plan - nice and simple, which helps!

Thanks NoSugar! I just ordered the book! It sounds like my kind of book!

Day 6 - It was a good day overall - however I felt the Beast Call out with a loud shout early evening when a long visit ended. Out of no where the shout came .... YOU NEED A DRINK! I really had to analyze it on the spot. Why would a meeting (it did go really late, and I had so many other things I wanted to get done) set me off into an automatic "I need a drink". Habit. Reward . Addiction. Withdrawal. Social Anxiety. Who knows why the Beast chooses the moment to shout. Anyway..... I'm excited to read this book!

Tired and heading to take a bubble bath and head to bed. Night Night. Congrats me on making it through day 6. You deserve a good nights sleep! LOL :thumbsup:

[Choices]

Hi 20/20, just read your thread. Your doing amazing! Really happy to be at your heals. I think your 18 month sober time is fantastic. Because you know what it's like to get there and know you can. I have some sober time too. So I'm letting that lead me to where I know I want to get. Your thread is so inspirational! Thank you!

[tonyniceday]

Hi 20/20

I like that PREP acronym - I'm going to memorize that too.

My wife and I own a restaurant so this Alcoholic has his own bar!!! What I do at work, and also in any social situation, is make sure I have a large wine glass full of apple juice (it could be any non-al drink). Then, when someone offers me a drink I just show the glass and say "Thanks very much, but I've just got one". That has worked every time so far!

[20/20]

Hi 20/20, just read your thread. Your doing amazing! Really happy to be at your heals. I think your 18 month sober time is fantastic. Because you know what it's like to get there and know you can. I have some sober time too. So I'm letting that lead me to where I know I want to get. Your thread is so inspirational! Thank you!

Thanks Choices - I never really looked at it that way. I loved the way I felt during that time. I CAN get there! Thanks for the pep talk! You just stay right on my heels. We're going to get to that 2 week mile stone!! Together we are stronger!!

Tony - What a great idea! Congrats on your AF life while owning a Business that sells Alcohol!! I know a number of bartenders who don't drink. I've always thought they were the best bartenders. I worked in the Hotel Industry for quite a few years and the owners of our company didn't drink. I always had such respect for them. I know there were a lot of Alkies in our Company. (Big Company). The hospitality Industry breeds a lot of drinking! :eek-new: Also - this shows me not to worry about my husbands Fridge full of beer and wine. I was in a panic that it was in the house - but if you can work around AL - I can co-exist with his Fridge.

My hubs is going to be gone for a week - so I'll be checking in here often. Not worried about being alone with that Fridge down there ... I've taped it shut - and printed a MWO post on it!!!

See you all later

[Choices]

Hi 20/20,

Best of luck while hubby is away. I am loving these ideas your doing like the note on the fridge. I'm on day 3, Saturday morning here and no hangover, feeling terrible, and guilty. Bliss. It is great to be back! Yes, I'm totally going to hang on to your coat tails!! Hope you do not mind!

[20/20]

Choices - You're going to catch me with the time zone you're in!! :yay: I honestly believe we can't make it alone! If we could of, we would of!!!! We NEED to cling onto each other - Laugh and cry with each other! It's like Aihlf said in an earlier post ... Our families and loved ones, and even friends don't know how to help us, because they have their own healing to do BECAUSE of us!! So we need someone in the trenches with us that's fighting along side of us. No one understands us like WE do!! Let's do this thing ... with every ounce of our beings. In the good days - the bad days - and God forbid - in the fallen days (hopefully we won't be going there). But you know what I mean!

Day 7 - wrapping up this week much like I did 8 years ago on day 7. Feeling certain that this is what I need to be doing and the strength building that I WILL DO THIS THIS TIME!

[Choices]

That's fantastic 20/20! You know it only gets better! I'm in New Zealand so as the world turns a day a head. Coming into afternoon. 2pm... we are off to some friends to hang out.. The woman is pregnant.. and not drinking obviously! I'm not sure, there might be beer there for hubby.. but he isn't interested at the moment because of a bad hangover the next night himself... Our house usually isn't so messed up, so it was rare.. but yep, he is on the two week sober trail with me. So it will be fun. Ah, feeling like just staying home and not going to our friends.. but they are good ones and easy to hang out with... I'm just feeling lazy! Have a good night

[20/20]

Day 7

Quote of the day:

"Don't cling to a Mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it"

It's getting late here Choices, but it's almost tomorrow! Yeah! Hope you have a good night with friends. I'm sure the pregnant friend will be happy to have a non drinking person hanging out with her!

[madonmehndi]

So Happy for you 20/20 A WHOLE WEEK SOBER!!! well done you! How have you been overall? Many cravings? I managed my Friday night without too much trouble and on day 6 today!