What positives have you noticed already?

[SoCali]

Starty - AWESOME post and gives me great hope for my future! I have noticed in the last few months that my mental clarity and memory in general have been CRAP! It's gotten me so scared that I have damaged my brain and that I'm sending myself into early dementia because I swear, I can't remember anything and I get so confused! So, please tell me "what" your mental state was like 90 days ago before you quit versus now. I have to HOPE that as time goes on, being AF will help my memory and mental clarity. Any input (from anyone!) about how your memory, brain function, mental clarity (etc) has improved as time goes on AF will be GREATLY appreciated!

[abcowboy]

My biggest positive is that I deal with my emotions now, as they come to me. This makes me a happier, healthier guy! No more burst of anger directed at people or objects, no more wishing I could take back something I said during a moment of anger.

I too noticed a "brain lapse" or better yet, lack of concentration, when I first quit as well Maddy. I told my counsellor about it and she recommended word puzzles or Mensa quizzes to get my brain back on track. It sure helped!

[wagmor]

My positives thus far at day 132:

- Lost almost 20 pounds in the first 6 weeks or so and am keeping it off pretty easily. I'm back to a healthy weight that looks and feels great for my body. Because I feel better and am able to be much more active, I am more motivated to eat well too.
- Much happier overall, and my emotions are on a much more even keel, even during stressful events or periods of time
- People I care about very much tell me I seem much happier and healthier - makes me wonder how bad I seemed before
- Saved at least $1000, probably more
- I'm proud of myself for this accomplishment
- Developing better and healthier coping skills instead of simply trying to escape any feeling I didn't want to feel
- Also brushing off social skills and navigating parties and other gatherings without a social lubricant
- Knowing 100% that I won't wake up hung over
- So many instances where I find that my memory is sharp again, and knowing full well that many of those things were things I'd have been likely to forget when I was still drinking (things said in conversations, promises or commitments I made, items I've bought, etc)
- Significant decrease in the degree and frequency of feeling shame

It is SO worth it to be on this journey!

[SoCali]

so, not to beat a DEAD horse here but do any of you recall "when" you started noticing the positive changes (or was it just a gradual thing to where one day you just went "HEY! I feel much better / can think more clearly / have a better attitude" (etc)? I'm only on my 8th day of being AF but my brain feels even MORE jumbled right now, like I'm in an even worse fog than when I was drinking! Is this normal for being so early on? I'm sure I'm gaining weight too because I'm no longer getting all the sugar from the wine so I'm eating candy and ice cream every day (which I NEVER used to do!). Is it weird that at this early stage I can't really think about exercising and eating right (etc) because I'm just trying to focus on getting through the days without AL (not that I even have the "urge" to drink but it's been a habit for so long, I'm trying to adjust to NOT drinking but the thought of exercise, eating healthy, reading self help books, etc, etc seems like "too much" right now. Is this normal?

[SoCali]

I feel like it probably IS normal so early on and that once I adjust to routines (etc) without drinking, I'll eventually get rolling on the other stuff (exercise, getting back into hiking and things I used to do). Maybe I just need to give myself some "time" to get used to being AF and THEN start on the other positive stuff?

[NoSugar]

I was a lump for almost 4 months. They passed very slowly but I think a lot of healing happens when you slow down. I liked all the reading and learning but I didn't exercise, cook much, socialize, craft etc. I did my work job and became a non-drinker. That was pretty much it. Other people succeed by getting really busy and involved in life. That's fine, too. I'd say do what you want and don't question or judge yourself as long as you don't drink :smile:.

[wagmor]

so, not to beat a DEAD horse here but do any of you recall "when" you started noticing the positive changes (or was it just a gradual thing to where one day you just went "HEY! I feel much better / can think more clearly / have a better attitude" (etc)? I'm only on my 8th day of being AF but my brain feels even MORE jumbled right now, like I'm in an even worse fog than when I was drinking! Is this normal for being so early on? I'm sure I'm gaining weight too because I'm no longer getting all the sugar from the wine so I'm eating candy and ice cream every day (which I NEVER used to do!). Is it weird that at this early stage I can't really think about exercising and eating right (etc) because I'm just trying to focus on getting through the days without AL (not that I even have the "urge" to drink but it's been a habit for so long, I'm trying to adjust to NOT drinking but the thought of exercise, eating healthy, reading self help books, etc, etc seems like "too much" right now. Is this normal?

For me the first wave of improvement came after about 2 weeks - I think it took that long just to get the first layers of fog and crap out of my system, including out of my brain. Then it seems like another level of improvement came around day 50-60, and another around day 90-100. For many people, the time right after day 100 can cause problems cuz it's around then that you start to feel so good you forget how crappy it felt while drinking - it's easy to get suckered into thinking "I'm all better now and can just moderate." It's not true - don't fall for it!

Now, on day 135, I feel pretty clear and sharp - I remember stuff much better than before (MUCH better), and I don't lose my train of thought as easily. Of course, I'm also not having blackout periods anymore, and those were really compromising my ability to remember stuff I'd said, done, witnessed, etc.

I don't think you need to anything else right now except nurture your quit. As NS said, for some people it helps to become really busy. For others, it's time to turn inward and do some serious self-care. The #1 top priority should be sticking with your quit - don't worry about any of the rest. If you aren't someone who naturally gravitates toward exercise as a coping mechanism or de-stressing method, it will probably feel like "more work" to do right now, and I wouldn't push yourself.

[madonmehndi]

I feel like it probably IS normal so early on and that once I adjust to routines (etc) without drinking, I'll eventually get rolling on the other stuff (exercise, getting back into hiking and things I used to do). Maybe I just need to give myself some "time" to get used to being AF and THEN start on the other positive stuff?

Deffo!! I am just clinging onto maintaining sobriety, reading and sleeping a lit and not bothering about exercise really yet (not big on it anyway!) I too have developed a sweet tooth I never had but it is lessening a bit now, just do what you feel like and don't worry you are doing great!

[SoCali]

Thank you all! Honestly, I can't believe I am the same person I was nine days ago when I posted my very first post here about how SCARED I was about starting this journey. In nine short days, I have changed internally SOOOOOOO much and I am happier every, single day when I wake up clear headed and proud of myself for not drinking. Strangely, at this stage, I don't even have the desire AT ALL! Went to dinner with my mom a few nights ago and she had a couple of glasses of wine and I didn't feel "sad" or "sorry" that I couldn't join her, I just felt happy. Happy that I DIDN'T feel sad and happy that I didn't feel like I was "missing out" by not drinking. This time is most definitely different than any other time I quit.

I am going to take all of your advise and just let me be "me" in this journey, and know that however the process unfolds for me is how it's supposed to go. If I don't start eating healthy, or start exercising for a month or two, that's fine. If i start TOMORROW, that's fine too - I need to give myself the chance to do this at my own pace and not judge my journey by someone elses journey. Thanks all for giving me some perspective! )

[madonmehndi]

Bizarre one but my eyelashes are longer and thicker!!!