Hey, Hey…another Newbie here.
The snow is coming down hard and the wind is howling around my little house, but I am safe, toasty, (not toasted) and sober. I am almost 3 months AF, but this wasn’t always the case. My days would usually start with a little eye opener (or 2 or 3) before I even had my coffee. I would go to work with a pleasant buzz, (yes I drove that way) but all too soon, the euphoric bubble would burst, leaving me feeling toxic and exhausted. After I dragged myself home, the cheap box of wine in the frig would be awaiting me with open arms, and I gladly accepted the embrace. I would then flop down in my favorite chair, drinking wine mixed with vodka, watch mindless TV, pass out until midnight, then stagger up to bed. I would sleep for a few hours, when the nagging AV would creep into my brain and say “Hey, the tanks getting low here, so get your ass out of bed and refill it.†which I did, of course.
This was my life for many years until I became very ill, and the doc said “no more.†I don’t remember much about that first week of sobriety, other than lying on the couch fighting the depression, nausea and tremors. My hubby would try to comfort me, but I don’t think that he really understood what I was going through. It was a very dark period, but I survived it. I hope that I never have to relive those days ever again, and I guess that the best way to avoid it is to stay sober. The cravings are difficult to resist, but I do so, because I have been given a second chance. Some people aren’t so lucky; they can’t resist the call of the ocean below the cliff’s edge, and are lost forever. I chose (or was guided) to seek the safety of the land, and I am forever grateful.
Like many here at MWO, the struggle is ongoing, and I am glad to have found this group. (Thank You Cowboy) I am almost 3 months free of the booze and most days are good. I want to win this War and save my life.
Thanks you for listening.
The snow is coming down hard and the wind is howling around my little house, but I am safe, toasty, (not toasted) and sober. I am almost 3 months AF, but this wasn’t always the case. My days would usually start with a little eye opener (or 2 or 3) before I even had my coffee. I would go to work with a pleasant buzz, (yes I drove that way) but all too soon, the euphoric bubble would burst, leaving me feeling toxic and exhausted. After I dragged myself home, the cheap box of wine in the frig would be awaiting me with open arms, and I gladly accepted the embrace. I would then flop down in my favorite chair, drinking wine mixed with vodka, watch mindless TV, pass out until midnight, then stagger up to bed. I would sleep for a few hours, when the nagging AV would creep into my brain and say “Hey, the tanks getting low here, so get your ass out of bed and refill it.†which I did, of course.
This was my life for many years until I became very ill, and the doc said “no more.†I don’t remember much about that first week of sobriety, other than lying on the couch fighting the depression, nausea and tremors. My hubby would try to comfort me, but I don’t think that he really understood what I was going through. It was a very dark period, but I survived it. I hope that I never have to relive those days ever again, and I guess that the best way to avoid it is to stay sober. The cravings are difficult to resist, but I do so, because I have been given a second chance. Some people aren’t so lucky; they can’t resist the call of the ocean below the cliff’s edge, and are lost forever. I chose (or was guided) to seek the safety of the land, and I am forever grateful.
Like many here at MWO, the struggle is ongoing, and I am glad to have found this group. (Thank You Cowboy) I am almost 3 months free of the booze and most days are good. I want to win this War and save my life.
Thanks you for listening.
I'm just glad to see that you have a sense of humor, I sure couldn't get by without mine! I've seen posts for the Cowboys cattleman café, but is it listed in one of the forums? I've only seen it as I scroll down the threads, but I guess that I can find it that way just as easy. Still trying to figure out this site, but I will get there! 
Comment