Goals??? Where to start...Help?

[icandothis]

Hello, I am new here. I read the book and loved it. She made it sound so easy, I just picked up all the supps and the topa and started. BUT I didn't count on the psychological thing. I MISS looking forward to my drinks after work!? I'm not even sure if I have a physical craving problem, I think it's really a mental thing!
I think I expected this whole problem to kind of magically vanish when I started the program and maybe I'd lose some weight to boot. Apparently, it's not going to be that easy! Last night I reverted to my old habits and drank about 5-6 glasses of wine. Is this problem ever going to go away??? My goal is moderation, does anyone have suggestions? Help...:new:

[Keepon!!!!]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Hi and welcome icandothis:welcome:

Personally ive been waiting for my drinking problem to just vanish and when i think it has it creeps up and bites me on the butt hard but im still working at it MODS dont work for me

But I know that there is many on on this site that can advise you I was just saying Hi

Luv Keepon:h

[beatle]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Hello icandothis--
yesyoucandothis.

no way is it ever gonna be EASY though--but with MWO, it is definitely doable, it's not hell, and you can have fun too.

If you are not physically addicted, you have to get your mind around replacing that drink at the end of the day with something else very pleasurable and relaxing. Something you can look forward to. It's different for everyone. Maybe it's even logging on here?

It seems that going AF for a while is the best thing for everyone, and then individuals can decide on working towards moderation if that's what you want. I personally have found it hard to be AF for more than a few weeks, but I also know I am not good at moderation so my ultimate goal is total abs. I'm working towards that. I was AF for a few weeks, slipped up for a couple days, and am now trying AF again.

There are all kinds of different people on here from all over the world. This means lots of different perspectives and a round-the-clock support network. Hope to hear back from you soon. Good luck. (don't forget you can use private messaging if you feel like talking to someone privately.)

[Guest]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Hi icandothis, and you certainly can!!!!

I understand exactly where you`re coming from, although am not taking any of the meds.
Was coming here for a couple of months before I actually could manage to make a start.
I felt utterly hopeless and posted my feelings on here. People replied to me, saying to keep reading and posting, and eventually I would connect and feel able to start my journey out of my booze bubble. No offence guys, but I was sooooooooooo very downtrodden that I couldn`t imagine that ever happening. Thing is, they were right!! Which is why I now tell you the very same advice I was given, which is........keep reading and posting and you`ll `see the light` when you`re least expecting it.

Have now got 10 AF nights outta last 12, and I`d been drinking every night for years.

We`re all here for you.

Best of luck,

Starlight Impress

[uda]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

:welcome: icandothis,

I'm pretty new here as well though have been reducing my alcohol intake for the last 8 months with counselling. One of the things that worked for me was to set myself goals I could actually achieve, so, instead of not drinking at all, I would start later in the evening, then introduce af days etc.

Like quite a few here, I found that moderation was very difficult and am going af for the moment. The main reason is that as long as I try to moderate, I continue to spend way too much time thinking about the when, where and how much of alcohol which seemed to feed the craving.

I've not followed the program though have read the book and am taking Kudzu.

You'll find heaps of support here and I'm sure the 'mods' will have lots of useful advice for you.

Take care
Uli

[Guest]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

P.S.
I wasn`t physically addicted, and only did 5 consecutive AF nights before starting to moderate-so far so good.

Starlight Impress

[Quiescent]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Icandothis, :welcome:

Do you have any other bad habits or addictions?

Alcohol is really the same, I think. Once you get the chemicals out of your system, you still have a nasty habit to break. I've heard it takes twelve weeks to break any habit. One of these days, I'm going to stop biting my nails too

Good Luck and Welcome to MWO!

[icandothis]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Nasty Habits...

So, it seems to be the general concensus that AF is the way to go for awhile. I must say this alcohol thing does feel like a nasty habit. And, yes I have been a nail biter for years, so there you go...

Before I found this book, I recognized the problem (er, with the help of my ever loving Husband..) and tried switching habits. I thought going to the gym after work might help rather than coming right home etc. It did help some, but I have to admit, the more I'm trying to focus on moderation (1-2 drink goal 2-3 nights a week) the more obsessed I'm becoming with the whole alcohol thing.

Are there any people who've gone AF for a period of time and completely forgotten about alcohol? Is that a possibility???? I really yearn for the days when I completely didn't think about drinking.

[blueeyes]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

I tried yoga after work as a way to get my mind off the "get home from work and drink" craving...But, yoga is so quiet and you get all that time to think...and a lot of the time I meditated on what I was going to drink when I got home from yoga! I'm doing better with Campral plus supplements...af for several weeks with no cravings.

[lushy]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Hi Ican,

I think for the vast majority of us this problem is a psychological one, not so much a physical. It is an ingrained habit that we reinforce consisently. I have found that I have to change my routine too if I am going to have AF days, otherwise I get pulled into the same old routine which includes wine.

Some people here would agree that abs is easier than mods because with moderating you are always plotting and planning when you can drink and how much, etc.

Stick with it. After time it will get easier as you create new habits and routines that do not include drinking.

[akay]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Hi,

I am new here. I am trying to slow down my drinking and have found that exercise helps me do this. My only problem is my marriage is falling apart; thus, in trying to deal with that, I sucumb to drinking. How do I get my self out of this hole I have dug? Is it impossible?

Kay

[icandothis]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Thanks for all the support guys. This book and web page is really a great find. I'm thinking I should start AF on a Monday rather than a Friday...I had to laugh at blueyes yoga response. That's so funny, I would probably be doing the same thing in yoga class...!!

[luc]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

:welcome: Hello icandothis - it's mostly all been said about abs / mods. I think it depends how much resove you have, and only you can tell. Personally, I'm useless at moderation; one glass of wine becomes one bottle, two glasses of wine...........So it has to be abs for me.

Good luck ican - you are with like minds.

PS I have a mission for you to start a 'Lets stop biting our nails' thread. Inaugural members, Quiescent and I. (I don't want any of those revolting bitter tastes that have to be painted on though).

luc
x

[Guest]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

Welcome to M.W.O. akay,
Am sorry to hear you have marriage problems. I used to drink every night to relieve stress and find a little escape from all my problems. That`s just it though -the wine `glow` could only take me away from my problems for a mere few hrs and when I woke up in the mornings, my problems remained unchanged.

It`s hard when going through a particularly rough time, but think more issues in our lives can be resolved if we approach them with a clear head. Try to get whatever support you can from family and friends to help you through a difficult time without seeking solace in the booze. And you will find endless support and encouragement from all of us here.

Best wishes,

Starlight Impress

[icandothis]

Goals??? Where to start...Help?

I will be happy to join any lets stop biting our nails threads! It's just one habit I've been unable to kick over the years. Stopped many times but always "fell off the wagon" and resumed at some point!

Sorry about the stress in your life akay. I also have some stressfull problems in my marriage as well, related to my husbands health, that were helping me to drink. All I can say, is that I feel much more able to handle life stress when I am NOT drinking. It just adds to the problems. That being said, I am still always tempted by that glass of wine (or 5) at the end of the day! Maybe we can do this together.

Good luck!