Newbies in need - Day 28

[retteacher]

Hi Everyone: This will be a quick opening to the thread. I have a dentist appointment. Yesterday, I slipped...not too bad, but I was not AF. I guess I ignored the "one day at a time," "just for today, I won't drink" mantras. I'm back on track today & not beating myself up. At least I didn't get drunk. I think I was letting myself think about life wo/wh. wine. If I look into the future like that, I get weak & drink. Anyhow, closing on a positive note, I have a plan today & will stick to it.

[Kitty]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Hi Teach and all to come,

Not much happening here today, just waiting around for the call about the job. Feeling a little bit down today, mostly about my financial prospects but luckily my partner can just about support us both so we won't starve. I mustn't let being unemployed get me down worse things can happen eh? Just going to have to switch up a gear with the job hunting if this job comes to nothing.

Day 11af now and pleased about that anyway.

Have a good day everyone,

Kitty

[nancy]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Wednesday check

Hey Teach, glad you are focusing on one day at a time.
Kitty, I am so happy for you, truly am. Quitting both cigs and alcohol. You are doing such a good thing for yourself.And it's tough but it will pay off. I quit smoking many years ago after several failed attempts.

I am on Day 3 of habit change. Yesterday I had a massive craving for a second latte and I just bought it. I think caffeine addiction is pretty severe. But that doesn't affect the habit change I listed: not buying a double latte every day on the way to work. I managed that one. I wonder what it would be like to cut caffeine all through the week and just have one on weekdays. I wonder if you would feel less anxious and skip that slump that comes when it wears off and be better able to resist alcohol. After one cup I feel like running back for another one. I have to prevent myself and it's tough.

I read a book called Trauma and Addiction. It discussed the connection between childhood and addiction, as the book title suggests. The premise is that pepole self-medicicate as a dysfunctional way to deal with trauma. There is quite a bit on something I have never experienced: trauma caused by living with an alcoholic parent. Half the book was made up of case studies, which I didn't read.

Anyway, I think I have read so many books on this I need to put my focus on Buddhism and meditation for a while and maybe some more nutrition books.

I have read so much about alcohol and bad health that I am serious this time about not having it be a problem. No drinks this week. Maybe I will have a few on the weekend.

[Sweet Cheeks]

Newbies in need - Day 28

I think we're all guilty of that, but as you say, don't beat yourself up for it - you're doing great.
SC

[louise]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Glad your slip was minor Retteach. I like your new avatar Kitty - it suits your new attitude. I thought you had gotten a job and were just looking for a better one? Sorry if it did not work out but good for you for staying AF. I stayed AF and cig free yesterday despite great cig cravings. Nancy, you are doing well on staying AF during the week so 2 lattes does not seem bad. At least you got calcium! Did you see the cheese addiction thread? Maybe it was a milk craving. Hope you are doing well S.C. Hi to all others to come. Has anyone heard from Roxanne?

[Kitty]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Hi all,

Well I got the call and it wasn't good news. (Louise I couldn't do the first job because of the late hours and I haven't got transport) So I have very mixed emotions right now. I'd be lying if I said I couldn't do with a drink and a cigarette. Feeling low about the job but still excited about tomorrow because we pick up the kitten. Wish he was here already cause I could use a snuggle right now.

Oh well I guess these things are sent to try us, and there are some people on here going through some tremendously hard times at the moment so in the scheme of things my lot is not too bad.

Sorry for a glum thread, just thought I'd sound off for a bit.


Kitty

[Guest]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Hi all,
Good going on the AF days.

Retteacher, great to see that your slip was no great big disaster........you`re doing fab. with your day at a time approach!!!

Louise,well done for yesterday!!

But Kitty...........am so full of admiration for you, giving up the booze and ciggies all at once..........have now been AF 15 out of last 18 nights and there really wouldn`t be the slightest chance of me managing even 1 AF night without my smokes!!!! Keep your chin up on the jobs front........am sure something inspiring will turn up soon.

Good luck on the habit changing Nancy..........as I`m definitely a creature of habit in so many ways, it sounds a little tricky for someone like me.......maybe I got some O.C.D. issues,I mean like, I never doing anything in multiples of 3!!!! lol

Anyway, just wanted to drop in to say Hi to everyone.

Starlight Impress

[uda]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Hi everyone,

On day 14 and feeling better all the time despite continuing tooth problem - much better atm but must go and see dentist before it flares up again.

Kitty, hope you get a job really soon. It's very stressful trying to find one and rejections are difficult to cope with at the best of times, so you're doing really incredibly amazingly well! Glad you've got the kitten to look forward to!

Retteacher - good that you're not beating yourself up (making myself feel bad tends to lead to drink....) and hope the plan today works.

Nancy I think there may well be something in the trauma/addiction link, though not everybody who suffers trauma becomes an addict, nor have all addicts suffered trauma. Maybe more of a 'more likely to'? I'm really interested in Buddhism and meditation too - find the philosphy very sane.

Take care (and all those who come after me too, of course!)
Uli

[nancy]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Wow Louise! I am so happy to hear you are quitting smokes too. I didn't realize.
IT's hard but so worthwhile. we have to make sure you and kitty keep up with that. Did you see the nicotine and alcohol thread in the research section?

I am not kicking myself over the latte itself. The habit change is supposed to be for three weeks. the change was that i don't get one at the same coffee shop on the way to work as i have done for a number of years. so you see i have the option of getting one at work or after i check into work. But it's a very strong habit for me.

Another habit was checking MWO at work nonstop. I think that is not so good because it isn't private and I get distracted. Mainly the former reason though. I find that I have this thing I want to say and think oh i need to do it right now!!! it's stupid. maybe it is OCD.

Well, looks like I am in good company Starlight!

How to quit drinking asks how you feel when changing a habit. You feel intrusive thoughts and you seek something to fill the space, you tell yourself once isn't going to change things, that you have already done 4 days, etc. It's pretty similar to booze I guess. Maybe that is the point of the exercise. but it is easier to change than the alcohol habit. The simple habit was the easiest to change (showering instead of bathing).

Uda: The Trauma and addiction book isn't saying that all traumatized people become addicts, just that a certain percentage use alcohol or drugs, or behavior (purging for example) as a dysfunctional way to cope. those who are more open about their trauma tend to fare better than those who cannot face it or turn it inwards.

[NYCGirl]

Newbies in need - Day 28

Hi all,

Another quick post as it's late and I need to get to bed soon. I don't even remember if I posted yesterday or not, but I had my fundraiser last night. It was a big bust financially...there was a power outage in NYC yesterday and most of the trains weren't running properly yesterday afternoon/evening, which meant no one could actually get to the fundraiser! We didn't raise much money, so I was a bit stressed. I had planned to drink 2 beers (guinness because it's my favorite and also surprisingly low in alcohol). I had 2. I then went out for food with two friends and they poured me another beer from their pitcher. I didn't really want it, but I sorta felt compelled to drink it. I've found one of the hardest things is not not drinking when I have a craving, but knowing what to do with myself, I guess almost with my hands, in a drinking situation. I'm so used to having something to hold and carry around with me, that it's weird not to have a drink. Okay, yes, I know I could be drinking something non-alcoholic, but it's just strange to not share the same pitcher as everyone else. I guess it must be how when people quit smoking they feel like they need to be doing something with their hands out of habit, and not holding a cigarette is strange. Interesting.

Tonight I was meeting up with some new friends that I'm going to be traveling with in a few weeks. We met at a bar. I had one glass of wine (again more because it felt weird to not have a drink and share in that communal experience with everyone else). But I drank it slowly and for once was the LAST one to finish rather than the first. So that's good. No cravings for alcohol whatsoever. And really I notice I have more of an aversion to it than anything. So having a glass of wine was really no big deal and I didn't need to have another. Good! These were my two big, somewhat stressful nights out in the next week, so moderation was good. But I'm back to abstinence now. My hypnotheraphy CD's finally arrived today. I'm going to get ready for bed now, and then listen to the first track.

Okay, so tired! Hope everything is doing well.

NYCGirl