Hi OverIt. I spend about 90% of my time glad to be sober, and about 10% cursing the fact that I can't get drunk. That's not a bad ratio -- but it wasn't good enough before, when 10% was plenty of time to in fact get drunk. So I feel like it has shifted the balance of power, allowing the "stay sober" faction within me to win all the time, whether the other side likes it or not.
So what to do with the 10%? First, I make sure I'm not hungry or thirsty. Then I find something. This week, that's meant either walking to a movie at a distant theater, watching it, then walking home, or just playing a computer game and listening to the radio. It does pass.
Antabuse is a commitment. A physical commitment, in a way that promises to myself never were. I can't say I'll stay on it forever. But for now, if I want to relapse I'll have to plan it two weeks in advance, and that gives me a lot of chances to change my mind.
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