For many years I did ultra distance running. I was not very fast, but I was passionate and would run long, long distances every week.
For a number of years I would enter and complete one of South Africa's toughest ultra marathons, the Comrades marathon. It is about 90kms long and it has to be completed in 12 hours. During my training it was not unusual to spend the weekend running a marathon, or 2 half marathons. If injured, I would get up almost every morning for a spinning class or an hour of swimming.
I eventually stopped running due to some serious back injuries and osteoporosis.
I realise now, that this was the start of my addiction getting out of control.
When I ran these long distances, I did not always enjoy the effects of alcohol. I would have a beer after a race, but it gave me the same fuzzy feeling that I get now if I drink on bac. After a race, I would drive home, relax in a hot bath and drink a beer. Within half an hour I would need to sleep and would later wake up with a beer headache. One beer would not lead to two, lead to three, lead to ...... it was more than enough.
I would also self medicate my anxiety with running. The minute I had a dead line, or an important exam, I would enter a marathon. This would tie me down to a crazy training schedule. I would run, minumun of 50 kilometres a week for many weeks. This, despite injuries.
I have run through pheumonia, freezing temperatures, run in the pitch dark, all alone.. day after day after day. I have run so injured that I have needed constant painkillers. I never understood my running, other than it changed my day.
There is no doubt that running lifted my mood, calmed my anxiety and enhanced my creativity. My work collegues would joke about asking me to go for a run if a problem needed some lateral input. I would invariably come back with a number of possibilities out of the box.
For me running was meditation. Sometimes I would run for many kilometres, arrive home and realise that I could not remember one iota of my route. My mind had been so inward focused that I was one with my body.
I also revelled in the runners high. I would sometimes feel as though I was flowing, mind, body, soul, emotion were one... I floated.
Baclofen is giving me the relaxed body experience that I got from running. I can feel my muscles relax in the same way as they would after a long run.... or a glass or ten of wine. I am also not feeling the strong pull to drink.
It is not to say that I did not get drunk. I have many a memory of a race with a red wine tummy, but it was not the norm. I also felt drunk a lot quicker. I know that runners have very addictive tendencies. It was often linked to personality. I now think not... it is linked to anxiety and a missing ingredient in the brain.
As far as personality goes, I am not a tense, obsessive, anal person. I am, in most things, easy going and very generous. I laugh easily and do not bear grudges. Yet when it comes to alcohol, the wheels just fall off.
For a number of years I would enter and complete one of South Africa's toughest ultra marathons, the Comrades marathon. It is about 90kms long and it has to be completed in 12 hours. During my training it was not unusual to spend the weekend running a marathon, or 2 half marathons. If injured, I would get up almost every morning for a spinning class or an hour of swimming.
I eventually stopped running due to some serious back injuries and osteoporosis.
I realise now, that this was the start of my addiction getting out of control.
When I ran these long distances, I did not always enjoy the effects of alcohol. I would have a beer after a race, but it gave me the same fuzzy feeling that I get now if I drink on bac. After a race, I would drive home, relax in a hot bath and drink a beer. Within half an hour I would need to sleep and would later wake up with a beer headache. One beer would not lead to two, lead to three, lead to ...... it was more than enough.
I would also self medicate my anxiety with running. The minute I had a dead line, or an important exam, I would enter a marathon. This would tie me down to a crazy training schedule. I would run, minumun of 50 kilometres a week for many weeks. This, despite injuries.
I have run through pheumonia, freezing temperatures, run in the pitch dark, all alone.. day after day after day. I have run so injured that I have needed constant painkillers. I never understood my running, other than it changed my day.
There is no doubt that running lifted my mood, calmed my anxiety and enhanced my creativity. My work collegues would joke about asking me to go for a run if a problem needed some lateral input. I would invariably come back with a number of possibilities out of the box.
For me running was meditation. Sometimes I would run for many kilometres, arrive home and realise that I could not remember one iota of my route. My mind had been so inward focused that I was one with my body.
I also revelled in the runners high. I would sometimes feel as though I was flowing, mind, body, soul, emotion were one... I floated.
Baclofen is giving me the relaxed body experience that I got from running. I can feel my muscles relax in the same way as they would after a long run.... or a glass or ten of wine. I am also not feeling the strong pull to drink.
It is not to say that I did not get drunk. I have many a memory of a race with a red wine tummy, but it was not the norm. I also felt drunk a lot quicker. I know that runners have very addictive tendencies. It was often linked to personality. I now think not... it is linked to anxiety and a missing ingredient in the brain.
As far as personality goes, I am not a tense, obsessive, anal person. I am, in most things, easy going and very generous. I laugh easily and do not bear grudges. Yet when it comes to alcohol, the wheels just fall off.
Comment