My Naltrexone Journey

[brightlite]

My Naltrexone Journey

OMG Crown.....I'm 48 years old. That could be me if TSM doesn't work. How horrible. It is a nasty disease.

It's hard hanging out with friends...sounds like six beers are a truimph for you compared to what you might have done previously. Way to be strong. I was not so strong this weekend. BF was around all weekend and wanted to go out both nights. We did, I drank my wine, we saw a lot of people. I probably had at least a bottles worth both nights. I did not feel buzzed at all...that's probably why it was so easy to continue drinking. The thing that is happening is that I extremely emotional. More like sad, teary...started crying for no reason on Saturday afternoon. Could be a lot of things I guess. More than likely, the wine because it is a depressant. Also trying to fight AL and work on building a relationship is more than I can handle right now. I need my full attention on myself. Although when I do that sometimes I isolate myself.
His situation is more than I can deal with too. Nasty divorce and drama involved. I've tried not to let it affect me, but somehow it has. Time to step back from the relationship and work on myself I think.

Anyone else get really emotional at any point during their treatment? Is it because my receptors are now blocked and I'm not getting that dopamine high? It could just be me...just wondering.

[Chocolate Mousse]

My Naltrexone Journey

Hey Britelite

Now that you mentioned it I think I have been feeling a little more emotional lately, in fact had a good cry this morning, not over anything in particular but just put this down to well may be the two bottles of wine I had the previous evening!! You might be on to something there. I think you are a little ahead of me in that you started TSM a little time before me? I am now commencing my sixth week and seeing positive changes slight but they are there, units have not gone down apart from the honeymoon period.

[crown86]

My Naltrexone Journey

Brrightlite and CM

Hang in there it's not a fast treatment process...I got very luck with 3 months...be patient...as far as the emotions from what I know alcohol is a very strong depressant for days after being drunk...hell I know what it's like to be a babling baby wasted out of my mind...man it sucked.

[brightlite]

My Naltrexone Journey

CM,

Glad to hear it is not just me...even though feeling blue and teary, sucks. I guess I am a little further along than you and I will keep you posted as to any changes. We both drink wine, so it is good for us to keep up with each other. I feel the Nal is working slightly. Some days I feel like just being AF and then other days a trigger will set me off and I want to drink my wine. Trying to date especially someone that is on their own emotional rollercoaster really is not helping me...so I decided to take a break from dating. That will be the best thing for me right now. Somehow...I get caught up in his drama and that's not good for me.

Well, here's to brighter, clearer, happier days ahead!

[Chocolate Mousse]

My Naltrexone Journey

Thanks PV and Britelite

Crown for the encouragement,
Britelite, I too have given relationships a miss as I don;t want to have someone witness this mess I have made of myself so it is goodbye men until I get this sorted out. I always keep an eye out for your posts as I too as you know am a wine drinker and I know you are a little ahead of me in starting TSM

Best of luck

[brightlite]

My Naltrexone Journey

CM,

That's a good idea for me too. I need to focus on myself right now. I feel good and optimistic today. Had three glasses of vino last night with my Nal and drank them sooo slowly, it was my bedtime before I finished the third. It had to be the Nal working. Normally I drink the whole bottle. Of course I was working on some reports too so that kept my mind focused. That might be a key too....keep busy, you know idle hands are the devils play...LOL. Maybe have to take up knitting or something now that I'm sans BF....LOL.

[DisEase]

My Naltrexone Journey

brightlite and Chocolate Mousse - I am a wine drinker and though I have not posted in a while I wanted to chime in as Crown and I seem to have had very similar experiences(SUCCESS) with Nal. I feel like a normal drinker now. I can take it or leave it. And if I take it, I never over drink. I just don't have the compulsion to drink until I pass out like I use to every single time I had just one drink. It was like the damn flood gates were open and there was no stopping things until I was out of AL or falling down drunk. Most drinking nights before were black out nights.

As Crown said in one post, sometimes I take my Nal, knowing fiends are coming over everyone will be drinking, and than the hour rolls around and I don't even feel like drinking! I have always gone ahead and forced myself to drink because I want to maximize every opportunity to re-wire my brain, but about 50% of the time, after I have decided I was going to drink, once that hour rolls around, I find I don't even want to. THAT IS NOT NORMAL FOR ME!

I have lots of AF days in between drinking nights. I do expect that I may be AF in the future. I just don't see the point anymore! I ordered more Nal last night and my alcoholic husband said, "why do you need anymore? you never drink anymore and when you do it is only one or two glasses of wine? So what is the point in drinking?" Ha, ha, that is just how I felt a month or two ago. I could never understand someone just having one or two! And now that is what I am doing, without any effort on my part at all. It seems odd but since I have given myself permission to drink, it is no longer a big deal. Well that, and the fact that the Nal has taken away the high, the desire, the ability to slam drink after drink.

You know, I have always been one who had to do something if someone told me I couldn't or not to. It was like a challenge, something I could not resist doing. So the thought that I could not have a drink - it kinda rubbed me wrong! I think that is why the Nal was a good choice for me. I can drink, I just no longer want to! And that, my friends, is a miracle!

[crown86]

My Naltrexone Journey

Disease

yep we have a lot in common with the Nal TSM. Isn't it nice to be free and have your life back?

Congrads to you

[brightlite]

My Naltrexone Journey

DisEase,

Congrats on your success! I find it strange how quickly it works for some and not others. The good thing to know is that you are a wine drinker. There is an idea/believe that possibly wine drinkers have a longer time or less success than other Al drinkers. I am glad to hear it worked so well for you.

Keep posting you give us all encouragement.

[Chocolate Mousse]

My Naltrexone Journey

Disease

Many thanks for chiming in there as it is always really encouraging to hear another success story but particularly I find it more encouraging as you are/were a wine drinker. so much thanks again this has lifted me:l

[craving]

My Naltrexone Journey

its wonderful to see TSM is working for you in reducing your alcohol intake.

although TSM was only temporary able to get my units down I still consider it to have helped a lot on dealing with my addiction!

keep up the good work!:goodjob:

[crown86]

My Naltrexone Journey

Wow I guess it's been a couple months since I declared myself "cured" of whatever you want to call it with TSM. Life has been good. Since I havent posted in like a couple months I figured I would throw a status up. sorry for not posting regularly but it's weird when alchol was removed from life as a desructive force I really don't think much about it anymore. I sort got busy living again with all my old routines prior to going way off thee rails with booze. Funny old is new again and the newness fades and it's plain old life without booze...which is just fine with me and something I never thought was possible.

I always knew if I could just get off that damn bottle my life would fall back into place..and that is precisely what happened. Every area in my life is managable and mostly happy or content. I got out of TSM everything the book promised. The best I think is that I rarely think of alcohol now...it's just kind of a take or leave it type thing and it's most a leave it thing. I was re-reading some of my early posts here and man I feel SO deifferent now..it was not that long ago I was a drunk amongst drunks but it feels like a lifetime ago. It's weird how TSM re-wires your brain. But 100% re-wired mine. I kinda look at my drunk years as oh well that was just a phase..move past it. I could never have moved past it without TSM.

I am not 100% abstinent nor do I even care about it - meaning I think so little about alcohol - it plays zero role in my life. For example I have had maybe if had to guess since my last post a couple months ago maybe 10 beers..not sure don't count not do I care to anymore. In my book I am A ok fine. I had gone to AA in my youth for like 10 years ..no offense to anyone in AA but there would be no in hell it would ever work for me..NONE. I would have died if that was my only choice. I had a couple doctors tell me quit drinking or you will not see 50...I am 42. I am very well aware of how AA and the old saying it works if you work it..well hell willpower works if you work it...anything works if you work it.

Thats the part I loved about TSM..pharmalogical extinction works. I 100% beleive naltrexone re-wired my brain to a pre-alcoholic state. It sounds too good to be true I know...Just drink the way you normally would but take a pill each time you..the pill won't make you sick you can still get drunk..hell for me it oblitrated my tolerance from the get go...which at first i thought wow this is great Im a cheap date and think of all the money you will save. Then slowly but surely it happened I drank less and less, eneded my lifelong love affair with straight whiskey..I starting puking on 2 glasses of crown royal where I was always good for like 10-15 doubles ( I call'm doubles but who the hell knows how much I poured in my glass...lol more like quadruples probably)..then beer starting tasting like crap and then the big out of nowhere the DESIRE to get drunk simply disappeared. Then it went to not thinking about alcohol. If I do drink today it would the rare occasion I am out with friends or something.

At first i had a problem with the word cured they mention in the book "the cure to alcoholism" I no longer have any issue with the word...it's exactly what it is for me. Another site I used to post which was primarily an AA site, those people would have me burned at the stake for the word cure. Well bottom line it's what it is. They gave me crap like oh well if your cured why would have to take a pill the rest of your life? For me no PROBLEM...you only take it when you are going to drink..I have 90 something pills left..that could very possibly last my lifetime with drinking anymore..LOL long as they don't have an expiration date. I would much rather take a pill for the once or twice I now drink a month with like 2 beers each time than go to AA meetings 5 times a week and bitch moan and complain about booze week after week year after year and then relaspe..that would have been me. Quite honestly, it's so nice to not romanticize alcohol,turn to it, bitch about it, moan about...It's REALLY nice just simply forget all about it. TSM has done that for me. Don't get me wrong I have to pills in wallet and two in my car at all times...I never will forget the horror alcohol caused..never but I don't dwell on it anymore..it was phase how ever long it lasted it doesnt matter to me anymore..it's over it's done.

I also never bought into the powerless unmanagable turn it over to God routine...yes I beleive in god..but I am a firm beleiver in God helps those that helps themselves. I always felt the powerless turn it over to god was a cop-out. I beleived for me I got myself into this I NEED to get MYSELF out of this. I firmly beleive God led me to TSM and the rest was up to me...and how simple could it be..take a pill when you drink and let it re-wire your brain. No man is an Island. I received a ton of support from the all the awsome people which make up this forum, but if I didn't want to change, order the book read it, get the pills, take the pills when I drank..none of it would have mattered. I simply wanted to change and I still thank god every night for TSM.

Funny before starting TSM I was depressed to epic levels...going to shrink anti-depressants the whole nine yards. My shrink asked me one day "do you think your depression might have something to do with your drinking? anti depressants don't work if you drink the way you do." Quit the anti-depressants quit the shrink and kept drinking. In the back of my mind I figured when and if TSM worked for me I would start both again. Funny thing is today I don't see a shrink I am not on anti-depressants and life is good... ..happy to be alive everyday. Other thing that happened was right before I declared myself cured I got a German Shepherd and enrolled in one on one advanced obdience training. Anyone who has or has had a GSD know how important training is with this breed. My goal is to have my dog become a therapy Dog and hospice visits hospitals nursing homes etc. He has one test to go passed the first two with flying colors. From my training I have learned SO MUCH. I have had dogs all my life but never been to this hardcore of training program. Anyways what it all comes down with my dog is me...all me. This was THE best therapy for me personally I have ever had. It's wild how much human beings and animals have in common how much of this training is useful for me in day to day life outside of my dog. While this training isnt cheap..it's a hell of a lot cheaper than any shrink I ever saw and I get way more out of it.

Ok sorry for rambling...lol still longwinded here that will never change. Between work and my dog and all the little BS's of life there is zero room for the bottle anymore..all thanks to a pill called naltrexone and Dr. Sinclair's method of taking naltrexone.

[houtx]

My Naltrexone Journey

Great to hear you so positive, as usual lately! So happy for your new life and your inspiration to others. Unfortunately NAL just didin;t work fro me so hope I am singing the praises of BAC beforee too long. It's timing these pills that are going to be the biggest hassle.

Taking 1 before drinking is one thing..taking 3 then 6 then 9 then 12...3x/day...I'm going to have to write on my hand, leave notes by the bed...a bit daunting. But WHATEVER works!!

I wanna be singing the praises of BAC like you are about NAL. And hopefully sooner than the 6 mo. wait it took on NAL. Hoping...

[crown86]

My Naltrexone Journey

Houtx

Hey good to see you around also...I am sorry Nal didn't work for you...I am praying Bac does...you gave me support in the begininng on the sinclair forum I read alot of your posts..if anyone deseves a break it's you...It's also good to hear you simply not giving up and trying something else. I know nothing about Bac but from your post I am assuming you have to time the pills...well it's a lot better than the hell booze brings...if Nal didn't work for me I would be right there with ya timing pills

Good luck with the Bac

[gratitude]

My Naltrexone Journey

crown86 what a miracle! i do hope that it works for others as it worked for you. if not, then baclofen possibly. we live in a great time. why isn't this being broadcast around the world? why is it taking so long? between bac and tsm there has to be a great success rate. where are the tv shows etc about this miracle? unbelievable.gratitude