New here and starting Topa and with a question

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

11111

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[Wildflowers]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Play: All I can say is I'm so happy for you that you found your voice & owned your own power. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking care of yourself. You've been giving to others for decades & you need to stand up for you. The more you practice self love, self care, self nurturing, the easier it will become. We don't have to continue, to live our lives out of continual obligations. It's OK to say no. I think by doing this, it lowers are expectations, not only of ourselves, but of others. Reducing resentments, stress, anxiety. Which may lead to increased drinking. Maybe this a part of what they call Emotional Sobriety???

If you could see my :h it would be full of happiness for you, if you could see my face after reading your post it would look like this

Thank you for helping Space with her Uncle. Even tho I've been in similar situations, I thought you'd be the best person to help, being a nurse. She's a single Mom & struggles with so many things. She so often is helping others that are in need. I pray soon that her PDr. & Md will find a solution helping her with her pain & get her meds straightened out. At least she's headed in the right direction. Her & I use to drink similar amounts. I just wonder if a switch to Topa. might help? I don't think I could take that Serquel. By the way I only take Topa. My depression really went away after a couple of months of being sober.

Space: As for spirituality it's so different for everyone. Maybe search about it on google. There is also a thread on Long Term, Annoyance by Greenie who's linked some sites on this topic. I know without it in my life I'd never would have made it this far in life, in general.

Minus my last research & experiment already reported, I'm sober. It's still my goal. It's always going to be now. I lack the neurotransmitter Gaba, so Topa helps me. Staying at 75 mg. Don't like the tiredness, but it's worth it! Plus it does block the reward center in the brain. Maybe this is why some people, including myself were able to drink more moderately. I can easily drink over the topa., makes my anxiety worse. Then there'd be no point of me taking it.

I enjoy being sober, I laugh much more, I'm happier more. Tho I do have down days like everyone does. I sometimes miss the anesthesia effects for physical pain, but pouring poison into my body imo is far worse. I'm slowly implementing other tools to help with my pain. For the most part I think clearer. I do sometimes think I had more energy when I drank. But, maybe in time one day it will return. At least I have a better chance at a longer life. Point is, even if I don't, at least I'm happier now! Alcohol is a depressant drug. The Topa helps with my anxiety, which is what has driven the physical part of my addiction for years.

I had a much longer post to everyone else. But guess what happened? Poof. Now why when I post on other boards this never happens? I think there is a ghost or gremlin that hides or lurks on this board.

I'ts been a long, tiring day. I just can't re-type it all over again. I call this owning my power. Practicing taking care of me.

Namaste, :h

Wildflowers

[Trixiebelle]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

You are a very wise & caring person Wildflowers. I wish you all the best.

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi all, I am reading and so glad that you peeps seem to be doing ok, Play Im relieved to hear you get to have a breather.

I just havent got anything in me to say really, keep putting my family off and trying to avoid them, drinking way too much, I actually think the increasing my baclofen has backfired somewhat in that my depression and drinking is worse so Im just about to go and snuggle up on the sofa with my son and watch some daytime crap on tv, maybe, hopefully have a little doze.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

:l:l:h:h Space

Off to a meeting - back later

Sun XX

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

After all the stress my mum has just rang saying my daughter is going to a bbq and she cant be bothered. Why cant I just say that to them without all the guilt and stress and Ive got to do it cos I cant let anyone down and then I end up letting everyone down by burning myself out and drinking way too much. Ahhh chill out and sleep today.

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Space, Sun, Wilde, Trixi, seems like I can't say thanks enough.

Space, this is for you, you ask "what is spirituality", you say, "either you have it or you don't have it", you say "you just don't get it".
So, I just want you to read back thru a few days of all these posts, just read, don't think too much, listen with your heart, don't try to sort it out with your mind, just read before you go to sleep every night, and you will be surprised that after doing this for a few days you will begin to have a feeling of what spirituality might mean for you.

Space, wish I could tell your family for you. Wildflowers mentioned the possibility of Topa for you, have you considered it? It seems to be a miracle the first time around, myself included, and the thing to learn from that is to not stop taking it for any reason, I ran out of it in Spain, now it is not working, or I'm just drinking over it, but it has to work in two weeks in Spain, or else WILL POWER has to work.

Anyway, bye for now, love, hugs, and every wonderful thing I can think of, that's how much I care,
play

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Space, Sun, Wilde, Trixi, seems like I can't say thanks enough.

Space, this is for you, you ask "what is spirituality", you say, "either you have it or you don't have it", you say "you just don't get it".
So, I just want you to read back thru a few days of all these posts, just read, don't think too much, listen with your heart, don't try to sort it out with your mind, just read before you go to sleep every night, and you will be surprised that after doing this for a few days you will begin to have a feeling of what spirituality might mean for you.

Space, wish I could tell your family for you. Wildflowers mentioned the possibility of Topa for you, have you considered it? It seems to be a miracle the first time around, myself included, and the thing to learn from that is to not stop taking it for any reason, I ran out of it in Spain, now it is not working, or I'm just drinking over it, but it has to work in two weeks in Spain, or else WILL POWER has to work.

Anyway, bye for now, love, hugs, and every wonderful thing I can think of, that's how much I care,
play

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Space, Sun, Wilde, Trixi, seems like I can't say thanks enough.

Space, this is for you, you ask "what is spirituality", you say, "either you have it or you don't have it", you say "you just don't get it".
So, I just want you to read back thru a few days of all these posts, just read, don't think too much, listen with your heart, don't try to sort it out with your mind, just read before you go to sleep every night, and you will be surprised that after doing this for a few days you will begin to have a feeling of what spirituality might mean for you.

Space, wish I could tell your family for you. Wildflowers mentioned the possibility of Topa for you, have you considered it? It seems to be a miracle the first time around, myself included, and the thing to learn from that is to not stop taking it for any reason, I ran out of it in Spain, now it is not working, or I'm just drinking over it, but it has to work in two weeks in Spain, or else WILL POWER has to work.

Anyway, bye for now, love, hugs, and every wonderful thing I can think of, that's how much I care,
play

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Play - how did you manage to delete the two of your three posts?????? ROTFLMBO !!!!!

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oh, they were all the same, I don't know how they all were posted, how did I delete them? I just clicked on edit, then on delete, and I did it two or three times.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

LOL - I didn't know you could delete an entire post! I am just starting a post - just got in from work.....

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

well good thing, otherwise, three of the same, RFLTOMTB!!!

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Ahem - sorry about that - I am back - just came home from work and checked the thread before I sorted out the dogs and there were three posts from Play! maybe they automatically delete if they are the same? Anyway - so much for coming back after my meeting this morning and posting..... but I am here now.....

Gosh - need to go back a little bit and see what needs answering.....Oh Play - I forgot to take your stuff with me to work today so will take it to the P.O. tomorrow as long as I have a box at home here - and get it sent off....... USPS now.

A waffly mood - I wondered why you thought it was to do with breakfast then thought 'waffles' !!! No - it must be an English expression - I tend to waffle on at times, hence being in a waffly mood - anytime.......

For anyone who wants to post pics on here, without having to use photobucket or whatever - it is really easy. As long as the pics are in your computer, here is the tutorial:

Click on the paperclip which is next to the grey smiley along from where the sizes and fonts are when we are writing to post.

Hit Browse. Hit pictures. hit upload. Close window. Hit paperclip again. Then you can preview if you want to. And submit.....

If you need any more in depth detail let me know ......... I have it written down on a piece of paper taped to my desk by my computer!!! 'Cos every time I do it, I need to recheck HOW to!!!

Kradle - I was wondering if you had your L-Glut yet? I have weaned off the synthetic drugs - was on Celexa and had a really bad time weaning off it but am fine now. the only RX drug I take now is Topa. And I am fine with taking that. I had to go to have a mole taken off last week and as always you have to list drugs you are taking and why - and after the Topa, I thought "I am having a mole taken off - they do NOT need to know why I am taking Topa", so put "migraines". The Kudzu didn't help me when I tried it a year or two ago either but I didn't get the stuff from here and I didn't take it properly. As I keep saying and I know I must be boring everyone else silly - when I take them (L-Glut and Kudzu) properly, THEY WORK. For me anyway.

WTE - Yes, Daisy often sleeps like that - it makes me laugh - at least Charlie is a male - Daisy has NO shame !! No, there are no off leash places here - behind me is a park and there were a few of us that would meet very early mornings - not really planned but we all used to go around the same time when I had maggie and we used to let them all off the leads - one morning there were three of us owners and five dogs - the dogs were having a ball - I happened to glance over in the distance and saw the cops and yelled COPS - we all called our dogs and ran into the woods - it was so funny !!! By the time the cops got over to the trail along the far side of the park where we were further down, we were all walking along sedately with our dogs on their leads - LOL !!!

If you don't eat breakfast, like me, then you never will. You cannot make your body eat if you are not hungry. When my mum came to stay, she would say 'it is whatever time, are we going to have whatever meal?" I have always just eaten when I am hungry - find it hard to eat if I am not. BUT she has always had a problem with her weight and asked how I stay slim - I said to her "I eat when I am hungry - not just 'cos the clock says it is lunchtime".

I do hope that you got Charlie's ring and coller sorted out again - poor you and poor Charlie. Just think though - each day is one day nearer healing - really !!

I had to giggle to myself at your comment about "If I could open a bottle of wine like normal people at 5 or 6........" Yesterday I was off. I got up at 5.00am. I was out in the garden from around 8.00 and around 10.00 started thinking a Guiness would be nice.... after all it was a Sunday and in UK, folk go down the pub for a drink Sunday lunchtime..... ANYWAY I ended up pouring my first drink at 10.30. BUT I still only have my 3-4 - so it seems the earlier I get up, the earlier my body wants it - that is my excuse and I am sticking to it. I had four in the fridge. Finished those around 3.30. I won't drive after drinking so that was it for me. My daughter came over around five and I asked her to bring me some but I didnt have any more.

Once again, I am fine waffly form.....

Diz - thank you for posting. :H I think I would rather have smelled the Liquid fence stuff than your brothers sock things!! I haven't yet checked out the gardening thread link but will.....

Absolutely hooted at your comment that Charlie looked as if he had been in my garden 'cos he looked stoned!!!!! Oh - and for some reason, I thought that you knew that I had a bike, hubs is off tomorrow - not sure if I really want my pic on here but I MIGHT ask him to take a pic of me with my bike........ I will have a think about it..... So glad that you had such a good chat with b/f - even if it was draining - was it a good draining? Do you feel good about the whole thing?? That is the main thing. I do think that you DO need to go to UK at least to get it/him out of your system - either to make it happen or to know it isn't going to, so just my opinion - but I think you are doing the right thing.

I probably need to go to bed. Have to be up early for the chaps that are coming to do the gutters Plus I have waffled on Royally !!!!!


Love and hugs to all

Love Sun XX

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

bbb

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