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    New here and starting Topa and with a question

    July, I haven't said welcome to you but I've read your posts attentively and carefully. I'm very glad you are here.
    Just wanted to say that to you.

    Comment


      New here and starting Topa and with a question

      Good morning to all - just checking in and saying that I still had two drinks last night - well two LARGE ones if I am honest! off to PT now but will pop in later,

      hugs, Sun xx
      How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

      Comment


        New here and starting Topa and with a question

        Hi Guys!!

        Airam - Thank you for your sweet Pm and your shout out on here. If anyone else did as well, thank you! I need to read all the back posts today...it's been a few weeks. We've just been SOOOOOOO busy!! :thanks:

        I hope everyone is doing well. Can't wait to catch up. Hello to everyone new. I'm still on the topa. 125mg/day. It helps a lot when I let it. ;D. I've also lost a lot of weight. My hubby is wondering why the heck I'm so skinny! And also noticing of course that I don't eat very much. It's hard to. It's been hard on my running though which I really hate. I'm light headed on the 125 so I may go back down to 100 or even 75 and see.

        Okay...looking forward to reading up on everything. Happy Friday!!
        "Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them. Every day begin the task anew." -- St Francis de Sales

        Comment


          New here and starting Topa and with a question

          :clapping2: YAY!

          I'll write later!

          Comment


            New here and starting Topa and with a question

            Great to see you again 2run - we have new folk here as well and WTE is back as well! Illunimae - I did some of the supps, but not the CD's (I knew I wouldn't listen to them no matter how good my intent), I did get the All-one powder and when i use it it is really good - my fingernails grew for the first time in years, but I have slacked off on having it - the rest of the supps, something in them made me feel a bit icky so I stopped them gradually and just had the powder in a - what I called my 'mucky drink' each morning. Apart from that, it was just the Topa and me. This time I have added the one Nal tablet each day - not sure what that is doing really, but I am taking it - a 50 mg tab each afternoon when I take my Topa. I am still on my two drinks each day - when I get home from work I pour one then usually have a 2nd one and no matter what time it is after that 2nd one, do NOT want another. last night I think it was about 7.00 and I drank water after that. This is about the time last time when i was beginning to panic that it was NEVER going to work for me if I remember correctly.

            Airam - I don't know where my Topa is from - I get it as a Prescription from my doc so it comes in a brown bottle. Are you still getting the cravings or have they gone now?

            Sassy - as far as your identity, on occasion on here I have signed off with my real name, but I figure if anyone who is looking at this web site reads it, they are reading it 'cos they too have a problem, so I don't worry about it. Good for you pouring the wine away - that is the beginning!! Did you ever think you would do that?

            July - it will be good once the Topa arrives - let us know when it does eh? I am so excited for you. It is a strange feeling really - one wants to get it but then when you do, it is sort of a double edged sword - or it is for me, I want to stop - but then am scared once it kicks in.

            WTE - have you started the 25 mg again now? I hope that it does what it did for you this time again. There is always that twinge of fear I think....

            Claremont - Houtx, how goes it with you - Houtx, when are you seeing Boat Dock Guy? Did you see him last night or is it tonight? We await to hear the next instalment with - can't think of the word I want - but we wait for it! DAMN Topa!! Not really. Nice Topa.

            Going to meet up with my daughter and grandson - back later all - have a great day - I am off for the day. Oh - foot tingling like crazy!!

            Mum - how are you doing?? (I still feel SO weird calling her that!!!!)

            hugs to all,

            love, Sun xx
            How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

            Comment


              New here and starting Topa and with a question

              Geesh - I am gone for a day and can barely keep up:-) LOVE IT!!

              Houtx - I know you had a date on Wed. so unless you can't walk to your computer..................fill us in GF. Ok rude I know but hey, it's Friday already and we are living vicariously through you. Plus we all exnayed the name and are waiting for a little something.

              Sugardaddie, I know. I'm new to online dating and haven't been yet put off by the losers that I know I am about to meet. Chit - I hate the very thought of the idiot cheating lying ugly ignoramous men that may very well march through my life but there has to be some good ones. Seems like Houtx got lucky!! YAY!!!!!!

              Airam - I think mine are Johnson and Johnsons. But hey, like I said before stick with what is working for you for whatever reason. It could be any of the ingredients, even not the active one that is making a difference for you,

              I tried the supps and cds over a year ago and wanted to gag over all the supps. The cds irritated the heck out of me. I just found his voice and the elevator/escalator thing WAAAAYYYYYYY too annoying to get any enjoyment out of it. In fact, I even emailed him about it and think he re recorded it so maybe they are better now.

              No Sun - not thinking about stopping but just wondering the danger if I run out or did stop suddenly because I know that Bac is So dangerous to do so and couldn't remember what it said the the book about Topa.

              My headaches and extreme sleep problems continue but on the upside I am drinking only 3-4 drinks per night vs my regular 4-6 and I'm only on 50mg. That is without any effort so that is really a great indication that topa may work for me only two weeks in!!

              Thank God 2run is back - I've seen calls out to her for two weeks now:-) You've got a lot of reading to do girl. I can barely keep up after 1 day.

              Babysitting one of my grandsons for the weekend. 6 am comes early - holy:-) loving the time with him though.

              I'm so happy that everyone seems to hanging in and having such great progress. Only little tiny slips if any and then right back at it. Yay us:-) I'd write more but there is the cutest little guys opening and closing drawers beside me and god knows what he is getting into. Lata. xo
              Claremont
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              25 28
              1 year of Nal November 24. Started Topa/Nal October 5

              Comment


                New here and starting Topa and with a question

                Oh my gosh, there's no way I can keep up with this board! Seems like lots of you are having success here....not sure about me yet. Drinking less but not there yet. Seems to go up and down. One day I'll have 2 glasses, the next more. And 2Run, I'm so jealous that you've lost weight!!

                Houtx, you must be busy with Boat Boy. You're excused, throes of passion and all:H, but do fill us in.

                Claremont, I met my husband online. I actually had a pretty good online dating experience, met some losers but also some really nice guys, 3 of whom I had relationships with. No married men or liars -- well, just one judge who's profile said he was 10 yrs younger than he was. And a psycho who pretended he had cancer so I would meet him for coffee. (I didn't, and he miraculously survived.) There are some stories there, for sure.

                But back to topa. Has anyone lost motivation on this stuff? I have trouble even doing a load of laundry -- I'm blechhh.....

                Comment


                  New here and starting Topa and with a question

                  online dating

                  for the record, I met my husband on line as well...he barely had computer skills..his first wife had died in a car accidient, and through his liquor store, he'd "won" a PC...they came to his house and set it up, had to turn it on for him ...What the heck...he's not 50 yet, so he's not so much of another era, but really didn't know what to do. He had his young son help him take a digital picture, posted it on yahoo personals , and somehow I become his interest after not too long. He chased widows for a bit, as he was a widower ( car accident), but we lived over 100 miles apart, different states, metro area vs. fairly rural city, and he chased me. I blew him off to begin with , and I was a single mother of a 6 year old. But he basically wouldn't take no for an answer. As it turns out, he was his town's most eligible bachelor BY FAR!!! I lucked out. Like I said, he's up north this weekend-we have an apple orchard near Lake Superior-but it's good right now. Tonight,I'm recalling the commercial from my childhood for Alka Selzer, "I can't believe I ate the whole thing",,, I ate WAY too much pizza by myself. so be it. 2Run, I want your SE's. !!

                  Comment


                    New here and starting Topa and with a question

                    Y'all are funny -
                    Yes, been busy with...he who shall remain nameless for now LOL He ain't no "boy"!! He's lying about his age, which I'll tell you about in a sec. UGH - where to begin. The short version: yes, he was sweeping me off my feet. I was willing to overlook the fact his real life self was not exactly like his way cuter pictures he posted online. His email BS the last week was really winning me over. So we had a date Wednesday night @ the same restaurant bar and it was fun, but OMG he drinks alot!! He never seems to get drunk but he can suck 'em down like no one I've ever seen before. He's a nice man and is very intelligent, entertains me, has written me some great stuff, but has displayed some annoying things that have been...well, annoying.

                    Then last night some friends were going to a concert in a park downtown and I had invited him to go. Things had heated up enough and I was concerned about his drinking enough to invite him to stay over. The concert was fun and again, he drank a gazillion beers and never appeared to be drunk (I drove and drank 6 glasses of wine over the course of the evening)...the night was fun except for the overall annoying parts. When the parking garage ticket meter didn't work he became enraged & got out of the car, slammed the door...yelled at the machine & the guy who was talking to me...it was embarrassing & not pretty. He later apologized, but OOOOOOPS! Too late!!

                    Oh, and my sister ran his info thru publicdata.com and it turns out he is 63 and not 58, like he claims. That always bugs me. Plus he said his first marraige "didn't count" yet they were together 9 years. Don't people know their info is traceable??!! Kills me!

                    He is not a contender. Sadly all that excitement is gone - the good thing is he lives in Austin and I can arrange it to where I only see him once a week or so. He is nice enough and entertaining enough to where I think I would like to see him some more. See where he lives...use him for sex for awhile...and then dump him. I figure a month or two?!

                    Wait til he's had a 59 pack of Bud Lite some weekend, got him all satisfied, then say "Ya know what, Bud Lite Man, muh heart just really isn't in this...you are a peach of a guy ya know?! But I found me a suguh daddy!! on suguhdaddy.com honey~!~! buh byeXOXOXOX"

                    Sumpm lik at' :-)):h

                    Comment


                      New here and starting Topa and with a question

                      Only got a swift minute here but I feel for you Houtx - and he got so angry at the machine - not good!!! I had no idea that there was something like public data - your idea and plan sounds a good one though but be careful won't you..... got to go - back later,

                      hugs, sun xx
                      How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                      Comment


                        New here and starting Topa and with a question

                        Hello ladies! hope everyone is having a great weekend. I had a pretty good week. Though I was feeling a little sick I guess that helped me with reducing how much I drank. Funny thing, I used to just drink through the sick too! Was more in tune with my body and had no intention to make it worse.

                        Thursday and Friday night my parents were staying with us. visiting with them and also wanting to let them see how I don't have to drink all the time helped. I started to write a really long explanation about the dynamic with my parents, but it's too late for that, maybe another time. Suffice it to say I think I did really good.

                        Having some interesting husband issues that it's clear are coming about from differences between my recent reduction in drinking and his normal stuff.

                        Geez, I feel like there's so much I want to talk/write about, I don't know where to start, I'm just scratching the surface and don't want to gush all over the place either. Maybe I'll start my own thread. Dunno. Just glad to have you all here checking in and listening and writing.

                        take care!

                        Comment


                          New here and starting Topa and with a question

                          Good morning Illuminae - glad that things are starting to change for you - feel free to talk to us - it is interesting for us to hear what others go through too in this. I know that the feelings change as the Topa works. they do for me. I have to phone my mum in a minute and she doesn't like me taking the Topa - she has just realised I am back on it so we are going to have this phone call with an elephant on the phone with us that both of us are going to ignore! She thinks I should do it on my own - she says that it isn't me doing it but a tablet! I think if I need help, then so be it. Not sure why she feels like that but I don't want to get into it with her. My dad was an alcoholic and so was mum's mum so I would have thought she would be pleased no matter how I did it. Okay - vent over. thank you. You would think at the grand age of 54 - or is it 55 - maybe 56? I would be over what mum thinks - but it is always with you!! Talk later,

                          Hugs, Sun xx
                          How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                          Comment


                            New here and starting Topa and with a question

                            Hey all!

                            Clare – that is SO funny about the CDs and the elevator thing. I thought the SAME thing when I bought them! Just cracks me up that you contacted him about them! I thought it was just me.

                            Hoping – I felt like you the first time around. I wish I had words or wisdom for you that could make it different. I don’t know why it was different for me a few weeks back when I tried again, other then maybe I had a different mindset. No clue. But you are cutting back – right? Feeling subtle stuff that you are rolling with a bit? I don’t know – this is a tough beast to be sure. Where are you at now with dosage and how long and how much are you drinking as compared to how much when you began?

                            And WOW – hubby online? Houtx! There is hope for us yet! LOL Sassy – you too?? Yeah!

                            As for the whole Internet dating thing – my personal opinion is that perhaps Houtx and I have a disadvantage being in bigger cities (?) I don’t know, but the word SHALLOW in So Cal SCREAMS here and beautiful women with so much plastic surgery they look like playdo babes is the norm. I’m pretty fit and I think OK looking for my age, **cough** and still really active, but man do I run into the goobers!

                            Houtx – sorry about Boat House guy! Good thing you checked – I do that first thing too. Remember that last guy that was going to go out with with the “newly built house” and was 58 was a DR and turns out he lived in that house the past 18 years, was 68 and retired. Now – not a biggie – but WHY was he lying about it? Hummmm…

                            And – I think we have learned, if nothing else, to RUN if we see they are heavy (abusive) drinkers. Like that is the LST thing we need to walk back into! I used to think I could never date someone that never drank. I am really re-thinking that whole thing now. My Mom used to drink once in a while but married a guy that never drank. He didn’t mind and she would have a few glasses of wine now and again. It was perfect. Maybe that is where I need to be rather than be with men that drink as much (or more) than I do!

                            Anyway Houtx .. I’m sorry. It is always sad when that happens. I know we have both been there over the past. Dust off. There for ya as you have been for me in the past.

                            Which brings me to Illum – This is the place Chica. This is our vent and our place to come to share and get support in our lives. So story away and know that one of us will be able to relate is some manner. Hell .. I see us all here as if we are sitting in a living room .. the fireplace going. (I am saying that because it has been raining here for two days and cold for So Cal) and all chatting about …

                            Well – I take the BONEHEAD AWARD for the week! I am totally embarrassed to admit this, but in the matter of being totally honest here – I will confess.

                            I could not for the life of me figure out WHY I was having SUCH an issue with the jet lag on getting back home. Got home Monday and decided to wait until Thursday to re-start the Topa on Thursday. I used to have 25mg and 50 mg tablets, and had recently bought 100mg tablets DUH. So Thursday at 6PM I took a tablet. I felt fine, but OMG did I sleep! And I went to work on Friday and lasted about half a day and was SO happy to be able to leave early. I came home and by 3:30 needed a nap. Took another tablet and took a nap – and slept until 11:30 PM! Now my schedule is all screwed up again! Been still drinking, although a bit less – maybe 5-6 glasses as compared to 10-12 glasses before the Topa last time around.

                            But SO tired! Again yesterday I took it about 6PM and had been working at home. Computer stuff and just exhausted and sleeping silly hours!

                            Yeah well .. I walked into the kitchen this morning and flipped over the package on the counter. I have been taking 100mg tablets since I got home! No wonder I am tired! Flip!

                            I don’t feel any SEs other than I am sleeping about 18 hours a day! HA! So I decided I had better not take any today! So much for starting off at 25mg! What a stupid mistake! I feel foolish to be honest, but I am glad I caught it. So .. sipping a glass of wine and will call it an early night and perhaps wait yet another day to try this again.

                            Sun – When you “re-started” at the higher dose” and your DR told you to go back down … did he tell you to wait a period before you started again to make it work? **sigh**

                            OK – Over and out .. I need another nap and have a bone density test at 8:30 in the AM.. Ahh.. the joys of getting grey. HA!

                            Hugs to all …

                            Comment


                              New here and starting Topa and with a question

                              WTE - very quickly as I leave in 5 mins - no, my doc said I could just go to 25 mg...so I did and re started.

                              Back later,

                              Hugs, Sun xx
                              How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                              Comment


                                New here and starting Topa and with a question

                                My Sunday

                                I was so ambivalent-should I drink today or not-Lord knows I had a bottle on both Friday and Saturday night what with hubbie out of town. Was a "good girl" all day: church, gym, cookingm cleaning. I had a bowl of chili at about 6, and was considering opening a bottle of wine. Hubbie was due home between 7:30 and 8, and I knew he'd want to drink then, so should I wait, should I get started, what to do, what to do...I kept circling, folding laundry, cleaning up the kitchen. It was as if a force was keeping me from drinking.

                                Good thing, 'cause guess what.. in the northwoods of wisconsin at this time of year, the deer are starting to be in "rut", or mating season, and they run crazier than normal. Hubbie and his son hit one, took out the pickup, and needed a ride home. Luckily, nobody was hurt, just the pickup. This was about 6:30PM, and they were over 2 hours from home. Long story short, they had a pickup with a trailer FULL of stuff (tools, ladders, whatnot), had to wait for the tow truck and state trooper, be towed to the nearest town, and by the time that had all happened, I was there. Drove them back home, got in past my bedtime, had a little more chili, and yes, 1 1/2 glasses of wine, then to bed.

                                Good thing I hadn't drank just cause I could've earlier. What a night.

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