New here and starting Topa and with a question

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

GOODNESS - No-one has posted since I posted last night !!

Space - where are you????? Please - just a quick post - let us know you are okay - yes, I know I am a worrying mother hen - but I can't help it !! I just WORRY about you. Love ya !!

Work was fine today ..... I worked in the back which was wonderful - NO customers, and the time flew by. Really enjoyed it - I could easily manage this every day! I also woke up feeling really good - am not sure why either. I have been having my all-One for the past few days and am thinking it is 'cos of that. I am not sure - all I know is that I woke up feeling better than I have felt in a LONG LONG time. Back to the old me almost. A wonderful feeling.

I have just baked a frittata - yummy - spuds, onions, broccoli, mushrooms, cheese, tomatoes on top - I am waiting for it to cool a tad then am having it for dinner with alfalfa sprouts grown on my counter top.

Okay - I am waffling - where are you all?

Love and hugs, sun XXX

[houtx]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hey Strangers!! Long time no hear from me - but I've been here! Just sometimes too late to post or too much to comment on.

I am not good at commenting on what everyone posts...but briefly:

Sunny - so glad you are still here and keeping it going! I'm surprised to read you're thinking of trying AB?? That scares me for some reason and I question you using that when your consumption is really so low. I know I know...you have always been clear about your regular drinking being a concern, but still. Sounds kindof extreme. AB has always been prescribed to the most heavily addicted alcoholics. It's a MAJOR drug. To take it to try and curb your 2-3 drink a nite habit seems a bit extreme, but I'm not you...do what you think you need to

Space - hope you're feeling better. I worry about so many people's depression on here. Am so in awe you are not drinking for no particular reason!! That is so great!! Hope you are feeling motivated to get up & about...as I can imagine it's baby-steps. Hang in there & be strong!

Meggie & someone else was asking about Campral...I was prescribed it and did use it for a few days years ago when I managed a few AL-free days. I remember it making me feel very mellow and lovely and good. I took it as I continued to drink and it did nothing, of course...but those few days I had, I thought "Yes! I like this!!" Unfortunately...the beast swallowed that up.

I still have a few pills of varying sorts. Capral, NAL, BAC, TOPA...I see them there & for some reason have not thrown their sorry asses down the drain!! lol Maybe I will tomorrow!!

I need to hurry with this post as I know if I linger too long, it will F-up somehow!!

Play, Teezah, Diz, Alk, Tx Ag (for real?? My kid goes there!!) and whoever else I missed - Good to read your posts!!!! Glad we are still here and not posting just b/c we are not on TOPA. I've decided not to start TOPA again b/c I am having enough cognitive trouble w/o adding a drug that has that as it's major SE and one I experienced. At least for now.

Thru willpower and the motivation of a rendevouz this summer w/ a major (younger) man from my past...I have curbed alcohol and food drastically in the last couple of weeks. Motivated to do so until I visit WTE in March and until I am in babeliscious shape for the summertime rendevouz!!! lol So I have been drinking "only" 1 bottle instead of 2 & plan to cut down in steps over the next few weeks. I can do this!!

So much more to say and comment on...but afraid I'll hit the Send key and it will explode on me!! lol Hope alls well out there with all of you!! Hang in there - be strong & positive. Get out of bed and talk a walk. Cook something good. Fix your hair, do your nails. I worry about those of you who suffer from depression...

Sending out positive vibes and hope to hear anything at all - just communicate! All of you & me too!!

xxxooo

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi All, woops didn't post this morning, but I have read thru and will try tomorrow, it's a Hugh or perhaps Huge task right now, tomorrow is #3 day off work, I need to get everything done!!!

love, play

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Where IS everybody??????

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Sun, dont stress, they need a day or two off, they will be bqck.
love. x0X0

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oh - I didn't see that Houtx had posted. Shame on me.

Houtx - my 2-3 a night habit has turned into a 4-5 a night habit. There. It is out in the open. It has slowly been going up. SOME nights it is still only two. But I can see it going up. And I need to bonk it on the head. SO, yes, I am going to go to the MAJOR drug and try it. I need a kick start to get me to go AF. the topa does work for me but only when I get to 300mg and then I get SO depressed. I cannot do that...... I have to try something - I am getting so discouraged so have decided that this is what I need to do - am scared silly by it but am going to give it a try.

Good for you simply by willpower, curbing your drinking and food - that is wonderful - it shows that you CAN do it Houtx!!! You KNOW you can do this - I am so impressed - I was thinking of coming and joining you and WTE when you visit, but am SO not the going out type of person that will leave the both of you to it - LOL !!!

Glad things seem to be going well for you......

Love and hugs, Sun XXX

[teezah]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oops...

Nearly at my one week then neighbours teen had a party so neighbours needed somewhere to go...

2 hours short of a week.

Roll call? 2 glasses red wine, 1 glass pink wine, 1 glass white wine. A tad better than 7 bottles of red a week

Deep breath start again. xxxx

[houtx]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Sunny - do what you are comfortable with for sure! I have seriously considered AB also...but it just scares the shit out of me. Keep us posted.

Yes, I am looking into flights to see WTE over the weekend of Fri 3/8 - Mon 3/11. I bet she would welcome any who are able to come...as we'd planned last summer. Talk to her...I need to lock it down pretty soon. It's damn expensive to fly there RT!! I consider $400+ damn expensive! lol I can fly to Puerto Rico for about the same...why is that?? I have a credit with her, but looking into booking my vacay to PR to see my boitoi this summer...only about $500 RT!

Maybe I don't know my geography like I thought I did...is it the same flying to San Diego from Houston as it is going from HOU to San Juan?? Dunno...and not excited enough to look into it - it is what it is!! What I do hate is sitting at the computer for HOURS finding the best flights on varying days, etc. Makes me crazy!!

So anyway - hope alls well w/ everyone here!! XO

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

What is a "boitoi"?

Sounds interesting

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I am wondering if it is the USA equivalent of a toyboy - LOL !!!!

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I thought it sounds like a toyboy too, haha Houxt good luck with that.

The reason I havent been posting is because Im just fed up with feeling like crap and even more fed up with talking/writing about it.

I went to see the CBT therapist on Thursday and what a fiasco that was, I didnt know that she isnt actually trained in mental health (she works for a mental health service) but she is just trained in CBT and for some reason, I have no clue why she panicked and thought I was going to go and kill myself, I in no way implied this as I have no thoughts or intentions at all and I didnt mention anything like that to her. So after leaving her I drove to my mums to cut her hair and while I was there happened to phone home and my son told me the doctors had phoned, so I rant them to be told I have to see a doctor today, it was 4.30pm so I drove all the way back to see my gp who told me what she had said and the fact that she had made an emergency call, fortunately he sorted it out and just said I was ok but I could have ended up in a psychiatric hospital from what she said about me, She has admitted that she is not trained to deal with people who have bipolar or I think any actual mental illness so I am now getting referred on to someone else. I do wonder tho why the only mental health service outside of being admitted to hospital employs people without the correct training or experience.

Anyway apart from that I dont really have any other news, Im still not drinking nor thinking about it. I even found a vodka bottle with a bit left inside it yesterday and threw it away, at first I was tempted but then the thought made me feel a bit sick so I just flushed it.

Sun I am a bit confused about what you are doing, you say you want to take AB but then you said you want to bring your drinking under control, does that mean to still drink? what are your plans if you have any, is it to go AF for a while then resume drinking at a lower level? I am confused because you always said you wanted to control your drinking not stop all together. Do what you think is best for you, its just even tho I have taken it and had some success with it AB does still worry me somewhat in case someone takes it and then caves in and has to drink. Ive waffled on far too long about it anyway I just want whats best for you Sun.

Well done on the week Teezah, dont worry about those few glasses of wine you are right to just start again.

Ally Im gald your tast showed that theres nothing wrong with you, but if you do go for the liver transplant can you ask if they can do a brain transplant for me at the same time like a buy one get one free thing.

Hi to everyone else, play Im not sure if your off work or in, also I have been wanting to know what are those cars you said about hiring, a zip car or something, I have never heard of them is it something you just have in your city.

Bye all xxx

[DizzyBee]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Space
My moms mood really improved for a bit after some vitamin B12 shots, I know its used for chronic fatigue and sometimes fibromalgia as well. We can get the shots at chemists but you should ask your GP to either test your levels or give you 1 just in case.
Will reply to rest later.
D

[teezah]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Ugg I feel truly awful this morning / afternoon. That'll teach me! I had the equivalent of a bottle of wine which is what I would normally drink 7 days a week and still function. But it must be that taking the Topa means I can't tolerate the alcohol therefore the mega hangover, or can I become less resistant to alcohol in a week? Whatever the reason, I do not want to repeat this experience! What a waste of a morning! At least it reminds me of why I want to control my drinking and it's also provided me with an excellent contrast between a good day without a hangover (yesterday morning) and a bad day with a hangover which was probably more like what normal was for me before starting on this journey!

Have a lovely Sunday everyone xx

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Good Morning all....
Oh Space, what a fiasco !! I am amazed that she can do that when she isn't trained at all, especially with people with bi-polar. I am glad it all worked out for you though - it must have worried your son too when he got the phone call!

Really great on the not drinking - that is awesome - good for you.

As for my drinking - what I would really like to do, in an ideal world, would be to be AF for the week, then have a couple at the weekend. THAT is sort of my plan. but just a couple at the weekend! And there is no way that I would ever drink while taking Antabuse - trust me, I saw a friend who did once, and I would never ever do that. I am hoping that the Antabuse will kickstart me with the AF - which obviously it will, and go from there. I know that the first two days AF will be hard - mainly the not sleeping, but other than that I don't forsee any problems. Thanks for the concern :l

Hi there Teezah - yes, when I only have two drinks, I feel so different the next day to when I have more than that - so know exactly how you feel! It is good though that you feel it - maybe you should write down how you are feeling now - or bookmark this page so you can read it and see next time you might do this. we forget so easily about feeling awful the next morning.

About to have my mucky drink with the All-One - I have been trying to have it every day as I feel so much better when I do. then need to get started on whatever I plan to do today. Outside is freezing rain which is putting a thin layer of ice over everything so I do NOT want to drive anywhere.

Hugs to all, love, sun XXX

[Alcoholic]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I really do need a brain transplant... I thought I posted here this morning and poof, my post is gone!

Teezah: I'm with you. I drank this weekend too and not feeling happy about it this morning. But let's just get back to the program....

Sun: I answered your question about where's everyone but I don't know what happened.... But I will talk to you later to you soon...

Space: really happy to hear you are still not drinking! Must be your meds!!!! But sorry about your ordeal... Maybe because that therapist doesn't know you well yet and or isn't well trained.... Causing everyone to freak out.... I guess you are not going to go back to her?

Dizzy: if I weren't afraid of shots I'd take those b12 shots too but surprisingly even my b12 level was normal. The downside of my health is that my husband now says I have no medical excuse to be so lazy. Glad to hear b12 also helps your mom's mood, too.

Ok. I drank alcohol yesterday and ate too much. Today I'm going to be better. Right now just trying to get out of bed, not successful at all.