New here and starting Topa and with a question

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Quick post then off to work.

Space - so sorry about the therapist - can you get another one or would you have to go back on a list? Surely they must know that not everyone works with the person that they are put with? There are so many different types of therapy these days..... could you try and get with someone else?

Houtx - laughed at your dream although I am sure for you it was NOT funny! Oh dear.... anyway, at least it was just a dream!

sorry but no more time ..... hope everyone is doing well,

Love, sun XX

[houtx]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Meggie - your hypnosis/ meditation DOES sound interesting. Where are you going to do this? There's a little shop across from Whole Foods that advertises for hypnosis, and ( what's that Asian needle thereapy for all kinds of ailments??!!) Dang - hope I remember by the end of this post!! lol Anyway - have often thought of trying it. Glad you're feeling like it's working for you. I am interested to read how it's going for you. This year out of 6 classes, I only have one that I truly dread and it is every other day. There only a few that have any functioning brain matter and the rest are stupid and very ill-behaved. That class is always behind b/c even when I water it down, they still don't get it, and are distracted with trying to mess with everybody else...constant noise and random questions & comments on EVERYTHING!!! No unspoken thoughts. Drives me NUTS!!

Space - I drink for the same reasons you & everyone else does: b/c I want to, it's a habit, I LOVE the way I feel mostly, except for when I go too far, etcetcetcetc. Right now, staying at 1 bottle of wine is working for me. I'm trying to ween myself off the bedtime toddy by reducing it and not having a Stinger (vodka, Creme de Menthe & dash of heavy creme) but instead just a jigger of Wild Turkey (tastes more like fall...and fewer calories and fat). But no matter how I do it, it's all too much and I know it. Still, I'm addicted and this is what I feel like doing at the moment.

That weird dream has haunted me. I'm going to my college homecoming next weekend, and there is one man in particular I think I'm going to talk to about perhaps becoming long-distance lovers. Why not?! Too much to go into, but he's never married, ("There's a reason for that! a friend once said. lol) and he & I have always had a great time talking & catching up every year. He's a nice-looking man, super smart, funny, a bit introverted, but lives on a ranch near Dallas/Ft. Worth by himself for years. Was a lawyer, turned teacher...we've always gotten along. I think this is the year I come on to him. What do I have to lose?? After all, I am 60 I can do such things. The least he can do is say, ehhhhhhhh not interested. The most: "Sure! bring it!" lol - I'll keep you posted.

Stuck - what happened??!! Tell tell

Hope all's well w/ everyone else! I'm "watching" The Learning Channel tonight - "Half Ton Mom", "Half Ton Dad", "World's Heaviest Teenager"....totally grossing me out, but riveting while I surf! lol Beats "Dancing With the Stars" and the other lame offerings.

ACUPUNCTURE!!!! Yay me!! And BTW, the weirdness of mispronouncing things has passed for the time being. I think it's b/c I'm going 90 mph and get peppered with questions during class transitions, I just get overloaded and things often came out garbled. I've slowed down & not answered or only concentrated on one kid at a time. PLus my drinking has decreased school nights. BIG improvement.

XO

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

OMG the Stinger sounds AMAZEBALLS!!

EDIT: Oh, that's right, you guys are probably wondering about the girl. Well, I'm going to spare you all some of the grittier details about how bizarre it is to sleep with someone sober. But other than that, normal life was completely derailed while she was here. We did go out for a couple dinners, and I did drive her around to show her a few things around LA, and we went for drinks - I didn't drink, remarkably - and I did introduce her to the bartender, but that was it. For the most part, we just did nothing but have sex for the last 3 days. In bed, in the shower, on my desk, etc., and I am exhausted. Muscles all over hurt, and I am really hungry. Dropped her off at the airport about an hour and a half ago, and it feels weird to be alone again.

So now back to real life, I guess. For the next 2 weeks, anyway, until vacation down in San Diego with her. Time to rest up, and eat lots of carbohydrates or something.

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oh, to be young. Also, to have someone who cares about you. jealous, but so happy for you stuck,
Houtx, go for it, as you said what is the worse that can happen. He can pull away or he is gay. But you may have a great new friend.
Houtx, I have been through 4 hypnosis sessions. The first one was a get to know you session, and he did his first therapy to see if I could go under. The next session I tried aversion therapy to see if I could hate the taste of alcohol, sorta like antibuse. Well, that didn't work, My therapist recommended him and they work in the same place. She suggested that he put suggestions of happiness into my head. Places to go when I need to relax, or to help put me on to the path of gratitude instead of bitterness.
Also, I have talked with Sun and Play and they seem to have a sense of peace. I need to find peace, I have a sick husband who can't give me peace and love. So I need to find it within myself.
I am trying to meditate, start the morning visualizing my perfect day. I have even found that I speak lower in my class. That awful chatting, and comments don't bother me as much. I am a work in progress.
I have also had to forgive, forgive others for being hurtful. I am trying to better understand why they are doing what they do,
Hope this helpful.

[Funny Girl]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi all - haven't had time to write. Sounds like everyone has interesting things going on. Meggie, I find that the visualization thing does work for me - provided I can settle my mind enough to be still. That's always my biggest problem.

Stuck - your weekend sounds so fun! I remember when I did things like that - now I'm just old & work all the time. . . . .nice to live vicariously through you.

Houtx - I haven't stopped drinking. Hoped to - but, I'm doing about what you are - a bottle of wine in the evening seems to be my norm. Less lately since I've been working so much, but I'd like to stop. Tried the topa again, but for some reason can't seem to tolerate it. Too bad - it worked so well when I first did it. . . . have to figure out how to stop on my own . . . .ugh!

Sun - you sound like you're doing great!

Oh well - I'll try to get here more often - just slammed with work. . . .

Later everyone.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi there everyone - funny girl - nice to see you. how are you doing? apart from being slammed at work that is..... The topa never seems to work the second time round. it worked for me the first time but then after I came off it and then went back on, it just wasn't the same - odd.

Stuck - lovely that your weekend was good - thanks for sharing and lovely that you get to visit her next!

Hey Houtx - so glad that your problem with words has gone away - that must have been so worrying for you.

Once again, I will say that i really admire you teachers - I could NOT do it ! You have my every admiration. Hope that you enjoy your weekend and meet up with that guy - and you can only try and see how it goes !!!

meggie - i would hate to be young again. I love the age I am at! I would hate to have to go through all that stuff again. I am fine how I am - LOL.

Yes, I do have a sense of peace but it has been a long time coming. I cannot explain why or how apart from working with my therapist, so all is really good with me. It sounds as if you are on the right track though ...... and I don't think it matters that you understand why others do the things they do - just let it go - it is their problem - not yours. If that makes sense? Oh - and you can only EVER find peace within yourself - there is nowhere else it is !! You just have to try and let the other stuff go - I am hopeless at explaining but that is the way that i see it. but I am pleased that you are trying - meditating is good - and it sounds as if you are on the path! as for the forgiving - again, I know I sound like a broken record - but let it go .... all it does is to hurt and upset you.

Love and hugs to all,

love, sun XXX

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Stuck, young passionate love, its great you have met someone at last. I am happy for you and proud of you.

Hi Sun god to hear your still doing well.

Hi Houxt also good to hear that you are feling better, plus cutting down the drinking on school nights, I have to admit that if I drank a bottole of wine a night nowadays I think I would be a wreck but that's just ne with hangovers, I don't knowhow yu mmanage to avoid them.

Funny girl did you say you've cut down as well, I think that even cutting down by a half glass a week s something if you can do it.

Meggie you do sound moire positive about yourself I hope that continues.

I am not drinking and not missing it right now, back to just not wanting it so that's all good. Im viewing a house for rent tomorrow so I hope we all like it. Its not quite in the area we wanted but nor too far either, still on my sons route to school. Please will you all keep your fingers crossed for me, I will have to find plays I feel lucky cd to listen to first

xx

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi there - Space - GOOD luck with your house tomorrow. I so hope that it all falls into place for you. It would be so good if it did - fingers crossed.

I am off today - have to take a few days before November so took today - it is so cold out though that I don't want to go out !! I need to work in the garden before winter sets in. the dogs loved it though - very brisk but sunny.

quiet here lately ......

Love and hugs, Sun XX

[Funny Girl]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi everyone - just a quick note to check in. Work has me soooo busy, but I guess that's good - less time for me to sit & drink. I have cut down a bit space, but really should just be able to stop - not sure what's wrong with me. . . .

Have my house on the market - it's been almost 2 months. Showings slowed greatly during govt shutdown & haven't picked up. Having an open house on Sunday, so I hope we get some traffic. It's nuts that I'm doing this during my busy season, but - who knows - maybe it will all work out & then in my slower season of the year, I can be moved & sprucing up a new place. Fingers crossed. Enjoy the weekend everybody. I'll work tomorrow, but have to vacate the house on Sunday, so will go somewhere to see the football game. Yippee! I LOVE football. .. .

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Funny Girl - there is nothing 'wrong with you' !!! If we could all 'just stop' then AL wouldn't be the problem that it is - just keep plodding along at it and try and cut down - as long as we are aware of it that is a huge step! When I went to UK and started again, it was hard for me to stop again - but I have - and will just not buy any. But it is really hard - we all know that.

Hope that you have some interest in your house when you have the Open House. I know things are slowly picking up, but it all takes time.

Love and hugs, Sun XX

[Funny Girl]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I'm thankful for you Suni and everyone else out here. You boost my spirits. I'll keep u posted on the house. I NEED to move. Living here is "soul sucking" . . . Killing me. Pray hard that it works out. . .

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hey there FG - yes, just keep trying! Why is where you live so soul destroying? You live where YOU are so until you manage to move, try and look at it differently .... just a thought to try and help until things get going :l

How is everyone else doing? Space ? meggie ?

Houtx - am wondering how things are going for you this weekend ....

hugs to all, sun XX

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

My counselor is amazed at the support of this group and the honesty. I also feel blessed to have found the path that I am on. It is so amazing to look for the positive, it gives you a new perspective on life. My counselor gave me sage to burn in my house and I am going to try Reki(sp). I told her about the book Emotional Code and how it talks about trapped emotions. So she has a Reki person on staff, she will work on my trapped emotions. Hope it works

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oh Meggie - that all sounds SO positive ! The sage I presume is to 'smudge' the house ? We did that when we moved into our house many years ago - and I am thrilled to hear that the reiki person is going to help you with trapped emotions! It all sounds wonderful !!! I am really happy for you ......:l

love, sun XX

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Sun, good to hear you sounding good and still managing nnot to drink. Well done

Funny girl, when you say you don't know whats wrong with you its an interesting question. Im not going to answer it because I cant, there is plenty of research out there that says the brains of addicted people either are different or react differently to others so that may be whats wrong. But it really doesn't matter all that matters is that you are trying to do something about it. Cutting down is one of them. Have you got something to put in alcohols place, ie, another drink or something else to do with your time. These things do make it easier as you can change the "habit" while cutting down leaves less of a gap when/if you decide to stop.

Hi Meggie so happy that you are sounding so well and positive about the things you are doing. Has the hypno started working then, are you still going? I used to have smudging sticks in my old house. I think they clean the crap out of the air maybe some herbs even kill bacteria so make the place a nicer place to be.I know they are also used for spiritual purposes but I think a fair few of these practices, especially in this country the old pagan/whitchcraft ones have actual practical purposes as well which is why the spells worked.

Houxt, you haven't been here since my last post a few days ago now, how are you my strong intelligent girlfriend.

Same goes for Dizzy, hope your well now and married life is treating you well. Does your new house feel like home now?

After the viewing of the house on Friday being a waste of time we have to go back on Tuesday, this is all quite dishearteneing for me as I don't know what Im doing now.
This is another noght of hardly any sleep, I don't know whats going on and am hating it. I don't really feel high just so exhausted through the day. Its getting me down, I don't think I slept last night as my son goes back to school today and I kept dreaming that we had overslept and waking to check the time, only to discover that is was around 15 minutes since I looked at the clock. I take herbal sleeping pills and have recently cut down from 2 to 1 1/2, I will have to go back up for a bit until Im more settled to do it. I would never of know that herbal pills I buy for ?1.60 a pack in the home discount store could do so much.

love to all
space x