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    New here and starting Topa and with a question

    I am sorry - I have been having so much going on - Joe - you drink GUINNESS????????? No time for more - Too much right now - am working early shift tomorrow. Will be home and promise to post tomorrow. No excuses - have just got a rescue dog and have been to their home and they have been here and work and stuff - promise I will be here tomorrow - love you all,

    hugs, sun XXX
    How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

    Comment


      New here and starting Topa and with a question

      Hey all - I posted last night, yet it's not here. Hmmmmmmm - I had a girlfriend come in town and might have been distracted and hit the delete key?? Dunno....

      I will make up for it later, but Illum, your stories about your Hubs and all the back & forth...UGH!! You are doing so well and then to get berated, sucks! Hope he "gets real" soon!

      I will come back with more updates soon, wanted to offer condolences to Joe & his beloved Lab who passed away today. Really sad for him...

      XO

      Comment


        New here and starting Topa and with a question

        Hi friends...
        I don't know if you remember me. I've been MIA for over a month...
        yep, I f'ed up. I had to take a business trip and got drunk at an airport bar, it's been downhill since then.
        I had done so well on Topa but I tell ya, if you drink over it... t-r-o-u-b-l-e
        so I have been drinking every day, when I had many AF days under me. blah
        how is everyone else doing? I see there are some new people here, that's great!
        Topa works if you let it!!!

        Comment


          New here and starting Topa and with a question

          Joe, re: my "F him" comment, I hope you know that was NOT literal - HA! I most definitely slept in the guest bedroom that night! And I do hope you are dealing with the loss of your beloved dog okay. Please check in and tell us how you are doing. I know the feeling too. I had a cat (I know, not the same) that we got when I was 5 years old that was the closest to me all growing up and it died finally when I was a freshman in college and that was very hard. We have a dog now that we got when my son was 1 and he realizes that he will outlive it and every once in a while he talks about that and gets emotional about it - not sure where that comes from. maybe Disney movies?

          Dreams, it happens to the best of us! If you look back here my last worst screw up was on a business trip too. I guess that is one of our worst triggers where we let our guard down huh?? glad you checked in and Keep doing it okay?! One mess up is not a complete failure!!! Just like a diet, just cause you ate that doughnut (and cake and candybar..) you can stop and have a salad again right?

          Airam, hope your flu has gone away.

          I have been taking vitamin C and zinc like crazy and I think I am holding my cold at bay as well as keeping the alcohol intake to more reasonable levels (thank you nal and 300mg topa) and going to bed at a decent time. Tingling feet and legs really is driving me crazy though. Since we're going away for the holidays and I know I'm going to be festive I'm thinking I might just go back down to 200mg for the next two weeks to manage the SEs and sleepiness, etc. What do you all think?

          Houtx, yes please make up for it and repost!

          Sunshine.....? You said you'd be back yesterday.....

          I woke up in a feisty mood today huh? Been kind of like that all week. Today is my day off and I have lots to do! got to start getting ready for our trip. Party tonight with friends from my hubs' work and my brother's family is taking the kids overnight (first time ever that stingy bastard!). Hubs going on a motorcycle ride most of the day Saturday and then my daughter's final holiday dance performance is in the evening. Nothing scheduled Sunday thank goodness. One day of work Monday to tidy things up and then on a plane to frigid Iowa on Tuesday.

          Whew~

          How's that for an update! Hugs to all,

          Illuminae

          Comment


            New here and starting Topa and with a question

            Sorry everyone - it has been one heck of a few days - first of all - Joe I am so sorry for the loss of your dog - nothing I can say will help - just know that you have my every sympathy - it is SO hard. they are our loving faithful companions - they love us no matter what. Sending hugs and healing thoughts your way - hang in there.

            I WILL post a proper post in the morning - with work, and us having gotten a rescue dog this week, I don't know where my time has gone. I don't seem to have done anything except deal with Ben (rescue sheltie - badly abused I am taking baby steps with him), work and sleep. Oh - and drink. not a lot but possibly a tad more than I would like. 3 instead of 2 type of thing. Keep forgetting my Topa which doesn't help. Also have a health problem which hopefully will be sorted on Monday. Has been worrying me a bit though.. Anyway - promise a long post tomorrow! HUGS to ALL Dreams - wonderful to see you back - of course we remember you - we never forget family!

            Talk tomorrow everyone when I am not so tired!!

            Hugs, Sun XX
            How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

            Comment


              New here and starting Topa and with a question

              Ilum, maybe it s ok to go back to 200 mg for you. I know I started skiping taking topa because of SE. In my case 200 mg was too much. I was having many AF days at 100 mg WITH a little effort on my side. But, of course, I wanted it to be easier and kept increasing the dose. I think it s better to stay on topa with less SE than to stop taking it (or start skiping days).

              Joe, I m SO sorry. I love my dog so much and she is so old. : ( I can relate to you so much.

              Sunny, you are ok, aren t you? I send you a big HUG. You are the heart of this thread.

              Huotx, I read your post! What happened? Please post again, I love your posts.

              Dream, as Sunny said, we all remember you and are very glad you are back.

              Britches, how are you?

              I had decided to start Nal, but it s not sold in my country. It s funny, you can buy topa over the counter but it s impossible to buy Nal or Baclofen. Not even with a dr s prescription. I ordered it from India, but it hasn t arrived. I think the customs have kept it.
              I have had good results with topiramate, not only for alcohol addiction, but also for hyperhidrosis. Guess I will stick only to it.

              Comment


                New here and starting Topa and with a question

                Airam, I agree that taking some dose is better than skipping. and yes about Nal, it seems to take a long time at customs. I just got a big order. If you want me to send you some of mine I would be happy to and you could send me back when you get yours? I find the combo seems to work REALLY well.

                Oh I wish everyone would check in more often but I know you all are very busy, especially with the holidays rapidly approaching.

                I went to a party last night with friends from my husband's work and had a fabulous time! connected with some friends I hadn't seen for a while and also met a new absolutely wonderful couple - a new gal my husband hired recently and her husband. They fit into the group very well (we all give each other a lot of crap so you have to be able to take it and dish it out and they were troopers!) Also the husband and I have lived in a lot of the same places so it was really fun talking to him. Sun - he is British and has coached collegiate 'soccer' for many years. they just relocated here from Connecticut for this job at my hubs' company. In any case I only had one mixed drink (a Kahlua and milk - haven't had one of those in YEARS) and three wines over about 5 hours so that was really good. I was much more interested in the conversation and joking than how full my glass was. Did 250mg instead of 300mg yesterday.

                Spent the afternoon wrapping presents and figuring out how to fit them in a suitcase for the trip. Also went to my second appt. at the gym with my new trainer. Yes! that finally has worked out.

                So other new thing... way back in the day before drinking I used to have trouble sleeping because my brain would go into hyper drive with all the things I had to do, etc. Well since I still drink in the evening and am so tired at night that is not happening, however... Since things seem to be working and I am drinking less I cannot sleep in anymore. This past week I wake up anywhere between 5-7 am and cannot go back to sleep thinking of all the things I have to or want to do! Case in point, look at these long posts!!!!! Crazy huh? :H

                Anyway, love you all and love to hear your stories.

                Airam, I'm serious about the Nal. PM me if you want me to send you some to try it out!!!

                Comment


                  New here and starting Topa and with a question

                  Hi everybody - I have to leave for work in an hour - it is going to be crazy busy, but hopefully customers will be nice. So far they have been. Most of them I can joke with and they seem to appreciate it - one told me they loved me yesterday (!!) and another threw his arms round me 'cos we had just what he hadn't been able to find anywhere else! Nice!

                  airam - I am fine but thank you for the hugs - I will take those anytime! I just feel kind of weary about AL sometimes. i don't overdrink - I never drink too much but I sometimes wish I didn't have AL in my life. IF I used Topa as I should (I agree with you Dreams) then it would work properly! I just am feeling sort of blah - probably a mixture of everything right now. I have a docs appt on Monday that I will be really glad when it is over - I just need my mind put at rest, plus work being so busy. then we have just got a rescue sheltie - we already have one sheltie, Maggie who is quite poorly but gets along. Ben is the new one - he has been so abused - it boggles my mind how anyone can harm animals. anyway he is taking up a lot of time right now, which I do not begrudge him in the slightest. he is the most gentle dog I have ever met. To get him out the back door and back in, we had to put a lead on him as the door terrified him (go figure) and he now will go in and out as long as I am there holding both doors open and encourage him - so a baby step but at least going forward.

                  Illum - you sound as things are steady for you, which is really good. I am so happy for you that things are going SO well. Isn't Kahlua and milk yummy???? I had to laugh at your saying F your Hubs and Joe thinking you meant it literally - us girls knew differently!! Anyway, we all have our ups and downs and I think it must be hard when you both drink together. I too, really enjoy your posts and I will get back to posting regularly again - it has just been a hard couple of weeks.

                  Houtx - Good to hear from you - let us know how things are going for you too won't you - have you decided what you might do AL wise in the new year? How about men - what is going on for you there? i told you - I live vicariously through you - I need to know!! LOL

                  Joe - I hope that you are feeling a bit better - it will take time I know. Don't be a stranger to us though will you, come here and let us give you support. Hugs to you.

                  Britches - how goes things with you? How is your hubs doing? And the Topa? What strength are you on now? How is the Al going? I know it is a busy time of year but it would be lovely to hear how you are doing....

                  Dreams - I agree - Topa does work when you let it. I went through that too and MUST keep taking my Topa!! It really does it's thing - stay with us, keep posting and come back to the family!!

                  Anne - haven't seen you in ages - hope all is well for you too!

                  I probably could post lots more but need to go and start getting my food ready for work - I always take tons with me. LOL Want to dry my hair too - still damp from my shower.

                  Lorry loads of hugs to you all,

                  love, Sun xx
                  How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                  Comment


                    New here and starting Topa and with a question

                    thanks guys. putting him down was worst thing I ever had to do but he wouldn't eat so i guess he would've starved himself to death. I didn't mean best friend lightly.
                    I have felt sick since. I slept a lot this weekend. I feel sick right now. I upped to 50 mg at night on sat night. I slept a ton yesterday. I wish I could go home and sleep right now. I have had dirrhea all morning. I didn't eat healthy at all yesterday. didn't drink at all though yesterday though.
                    is this Se's? am I depressed? what do you think?

                    Comment


                      New here and starting Topa and with a question

                      I think you have just lost your best friend - of course you are depressed. With or without Topa right now you would be feeling this way Joe. Give it time. Just let your body heal from losing your friend - grieve, cry, mourn. Sleep. My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry and really feel your pain. hugs to you,

                      Love, sun xx
                      How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                      Comment


                        New here and starting Topa and with a question

                        sunshinedaisies;1024856 wrote:

                        airam - I just feel kind of weary about AL sometimes. i don't overdrink - I never drink too much but I sometimes wish I didn't have AL in my life.
                        I perfectly understand what you are saying Sunny. Sometimes, I wish alcohol to be banned again! I know, I'm crazy and I'm selfish..:no:


                        Ilum, Thank you so much for your offer. I'll PM you.


                        Joe, ((HUGS))

                        Comment


                          New here and starting Topa and with a question

                          Hello all:
                          Joe I am so sorry to hear of your loss I have a yorkie and anyone with a pet knows that it is like losing a part of you. Hang in there! Sun gave you good advice..grieve it is important.
                          I have been going through a lot as well. My husbands eye surgery has been very difficult not healing as we hoped and this will be the first Christmas that my grandson will not be with us all day as well as my daughter in 14 years. I guess I should not complain as some people hardly get to see their grandchildren but it is hard.
                          I have not been doing that well with drinking either taking 25 mg of Topa but still having drinks at night. I too just seem to have a glum attitude and can't get in the Christmas spirit slthough it is my favorite time of year.
                          I reread some of the MWO book and think that maybe I should try to really get with it after Christmas maybe my head will be in a better place.
                          Anyway great to read all your posts! You all are great!
                          xoxo
                          Britches:l
                          sigpic[I]

                          Comment


                            New here and starting Topa and with a question

                            Hey all - long time no talk to and now so far behind to try and comment on everyone, so here are a few:

                            Britches - I'm sure at some point in the next few days, you'll get your groove back. Daughter and grandchild not there for one year will be a little hard, but at least they are out there, well and happy. (I hope!)

                            Airam - hang in there & sounds like you are doing well...as are Sunny, Illum and most of the rest. Lots of great stories from Illum - love them! Sunny, sunny as usual :-)) and a shout out to "Dreams" (hollah!!) Hope all the rest of you we don;t hear from much are fine too :-))

                            Joe - we are all so sad for you! Everyone knows the pain of losing a beloved pet. No, you are not depressed, you are grieving and it is totally different. Can't even say how or in what way, it is just different...more specific, I guess. Good the TOPA seems to be working. Hope the holidays bring you some comfort and joy. I tried to tell my son last summer when his beloved 13 yo cat died, that at least we had her for that long, etc...He is still sad at some level...still thinks about her daily and gets sad, he told me...and embarrassed b/c he's nearly 20 and still sad over "a cat". Doesn't matter...he loved her and lost her and is grieving. She was a HUGE part of his life that is now gone. So too, your dog. We are here for you!

                            As far as my stuff goes, I am on vacation for the next 2 weeks, away from the stress!! YAY!! Went down to Galveston with my girlfriends Friday night - one of them owns a beautiful B&B. I'm not sure if I drank more than anyone else, but I sortof passed out/fell asleep in my chair later (after midnight!). I was embarrassed about it...couldn't remember specific details about things they were talking about the next day. UGH - hated myself and was really in a blue mood most of Saturday. But I apologized and eveyone was like "Ehhhhh!!! fahgeddaboudit"!! Still - wish I could share more success stories!

                            A guy I had a one-night stand with (after a gazillion emails/texts) 2 yrs ago suddenly resurfaced on FB. We have been sharing more twizzled emails and texts the last few days. Fun - but he tends to play me and then drops a bomb about a girlfriend or something...anyway, today he called and left a cryptic message. Like! Doubt anything more than this will happen, but remains to be seen. Some fun regardless...

                            Next couple of weeks will be slow here...wishing everyone a happy holiday season! Let's think positively, drink responsibly and NOT drive when we have imbibed!! Check! Love you people - take care!

                            Comment


                              New here and starting Topa and with a question

                              thanks guys. well it turned out I really WAS SICK!!! i went home from work shortly after that last post and immediately threw up upon arriving home. Diarrhea and vomiting all day and night. here it is next AM and i at most of an apple, so I'm recovering. but i didn't take my topa last night, so I suppose I'll go back down to 25 mg tonight as I was only on 50 for 2 or maybe 3 days before I got sick and missed a day.

                              God, I hope that sickness wasn't just SE's of Topa! Anyone else had vomiting and diarrhea? it felt like food poisoning. i went to a football game, maybe I ate something bad there. but i have been really tired overall for the last week or so.

                              Comment


                                New here and starting Topa and with a question

                                Joe - I don't think it was SE's of Topa - it is too easy to think everything slightly different is a SE. Life still goes on! LOL - hope you feel better soon - Hugs to you.

                                Love, Sun xx
                                How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

                                Comment

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