New here and starting Topa and with a question

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Morning all….

It’s just not a good one for me … but this too shall pass.

It was another round of “words” with “buddy” yesterday until I just finally blew. 100% impossible to get him to commit to anything firm until I threatened to give them his address. THEN, he got my message.

Sadly, by that point, I am pretty certain our longtime friendship is over and done with for good. So much water under the bridge and so much old stuff that still lingers and is unresolved (such as financial stuff) and I simply can’t take it anymore. It was ugly – not the way we ever normally are with each other, EVER.

I have given up on the “hide the dogs” game and spoke to the sanctuary yesterday. For fear of ever being found out, I won’t go into details here. I feel semi-confident Charlie is safe. Only the next few days will tell.

I simply cannot be hurt by “buddy” any more. Old business dealings, outstanding loans, a “walk out” he did 5 years ago that he STILL can’t/won’t explain, the whole timing on him wanting to be a couple again and then the new GF, the new GF just weeks after I helped him with the dog, how he screwed me over selling my first car and broke a promise and then did it even WORSE when he sold my Jag so flipping cheap and the NERVE to sell it to her …. I’m just done.

And I am sad. Really sad because there was a time that he was the one person in the world that “was always there for me” – no matter what. That’s a hard person to lose in your life. Lots of history together. I don’t understand when things all began to change but he is not who I used to know him to be. Maybe I am no longer either. And what really sucks is I still love him.

I left our last email on the sweetest tone possible last night. I explained how this mess was just the final straw and I couldn’t let him hurt me anymore. That I am done.

So that is that. And I am sorry this post is all about me. =( I failed my goals again last night and feel awful this morning. Not just because of the AL, but because I screwed up once again.

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Dear WTE, you havent screwed up anything, you have so much sadness and stress to deal with so please try not to feel bad about missing goals, they will still be there when you are stronger. I know Buddy has hurt you so much, but now you can start to heal from the pain he has caused.

Please make sure you treat yourself as No 1, get the dogs sorted ASAP then look after yourself in every way you can think of. You are a strong, beautiful, caring, brave woman and dont ever forget that.

:lx

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Dear WTE,
oh please just hang in there and as awful as you feel also feel the relief that will come with the letting go of this situation that has caused you so much pain for so long. Even though this person Has meant so much to you for so long and you still love him, the freedom from the constant hurtfullness of this relationship will now allow you to heal and move on, and when this door closes another more healthy one will be truly free to open in your life.

You are not alone, remember we are here and are sending our loving energy to surround you and give you energy.

Play

[COSGringo]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Thanks all. Been crazy here but today calmed down. Wind stopped for a while so I could get out help some folks and get some things done. Needed some produce too. Been talking with locals and family and been busy readying in case things got worse. Have the house shut up so no smoke gets in. Dog is going crazy.

Fire has stayed West and not moved towards us yet and I think we are good now even though we have some weather coming through. Got everything done which is good. Smoke and ash starting to move in.

Some crazy photos here-
Stunning images reveal warlike damage in Colorado Springs : News : ColoradoConnection.com

Obama comes here Friday. Maybe I can get a photo of me giving him a fist bump? Secret Service might have issues with me since I am on that nasty med baclofen.

I feel for those that lost their homes and my friends are among them. No one has lost their life (that's the important thing) and I don't know how since it blew through some areas Tuesday and no one expected it. There are worse disasters and atrocities in this world so no need to dwell on this.

[MWOLady]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Question on Topa Side Effects

Hi all. I've had to stop taking Topamax because I had such weird side effects and I was wondering if I should have stuck it out - that they might subside. Anyone got any advice?

I got very tired and had to nap in the aft.
I also got a cough and scratchy voice.
But the worst was my face got very itchy especially around my forehead and eyebrows.

I know it sounds weird but about 36 hours after I stopped all the symptoms except the cough is lingering a bit, went away.

Does anyone know if I had just kept going if these side effects may have lessened a bit? I did find also I felt very spacy and really had to be very careful driving. Got lost a few times!!

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Just a quick reply for now to MWO lady - what dosage were you on? Depending on that is really what I would say....... I found that if I had any SE's at all, that if stayed on that doseage, that the SE's did abate....... one time I was driving to work and for about three seconds, had NO IDEA where I was at all - very scary - it only happened the once but it scared the living daylights out of me - I thought I was getting Alzheimers. The other symptoms, I am not sure were from the Topa - they could be and it could be that you are allergic to it. the itchy face - that sounds more like an allergy to me. How long were you on it and what dosage were you on?

Sun X

[mama bear]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

IS THAT MY SUNNI BUTT I SEE??????

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Ahem- well yes - it is - hi there jan...... how are you my friend?? Love and hugs to you.... :l :h I have just finished making some no-tuna salad and had great fun trying to post the recipe - LOL Ended up posting it twice - once in the archives and once in the proper place!

love, Sun XX

[RingingCedars]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Sneaking in to love Little Miss Sunshine.xo No tuna? Going to check that out!

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi RC - it is really yummy - just had a lot of it for my dinner!!!! love and hugs to you :l:h

love, Sun XXX

[mama bear]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

it is so good to see you babe!

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Morning everyone - where IS everyone? In a terrible rush - got to get Katie to the vet to be spayed - then on to work - back later

love and hugs to all......

Sun XX

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

MYO Lady, I think the itching sounds like definitely an allergic reaction and especially since it went away when you stopped the medication. As for the other SE they usually tend to either lesson or go away with time, what dose were you on and for how long? Having confusion and a lost feeling while driving is too dangerous to chance having again, so it would be either don't drive until it goes away or quit. I had that feeling on the subway the second day on topa but I was in no danger. I continue to have a subtle level of occasional diffilulty when explaining something and finding the words that I want but it never really is a problem and I find it rather interesting, I am at 50 am / 50pm.

I hope that helps some, the thing I think that stands out for you is the allergic type reaction. You could only know for sure by giving it a t Ryan again,but at the slightest hint of an itch you need to stop right away. And it never seems to make me tired at all and I also take 300 mg of gabapenten at night, it probably helps with sleep.

By the way Space, I think a large dose go gabapenten like you are on will tend to make you really pretty tired, that might be part of why you as so tired.

Love, play

[DizzyBee]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi everyone

Just checking in to say hi really. I'm finishing off my last bit of work so I can send it off and then I'll be taking next week off to finish off the last week of packing and bf is taking off Thursday and Friday so I'll have a nice long weekend to look forward to next weekend.

After that I will pretty much keep posting as normal during the week but I'm not sure about weekends, we'll probably be spending a lot of time together at first, as we have been missing out so much time together.

But like I have said I will be away from family and friends so I will still post and I will need you guys more than ever, so don't think I'm going anywhere.

MWOLady, I've never heard of itchiness but I do find that the Topa gives me a bit of a sinus type of reaction and I think one or two of you have also mentioned it. I notice I sniff a bit more, especially when I wake up. Its not really bothersome or enough of a problem to want to take meds for it, but I've never really had sinus problems before. Just make sure you rule out all other meds and that you titrated up slowly last time, and if you ever try it again, maybe try titrating by breaking 25mg tabs in half and only going up half a tab every week, thats what I did, as I'm sensitive to meds.

Waving hi to everyone else. Am really pooped after a day of working and running around. Feel like I need a nap before heading off to my parents.

Bf is getting very exciting about my coming over. Apparently I have all sorts of presents waiting for me. Its unfair as he knows I'm terrible curious and I told him not to ever tell me about something if I can't know what it is. But ah well, I guess a few days and I'll know what it is, I think the one thing may be an e-reader, something I've been wanting for ages as otherwise I end up packing one suitcase of clothes and one full of books...and then having to pay extra for baggage... The other one I have no clue.

I'm really glad things have turned around and we're both so excited now. I'm starting to lean more towards excited than stressed now, if it wasn't for my damn parents, I'd be crawling out of my skin from excitement. :H

:h

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I havent read back yet but Dizzy Im so excited for youinkele:, it all sounds so wonderful, getting to be with your bf at long last, lots of pressies, being treated really good. I am really really really happy for you urgirl: :happyheart: :l