New here and starting Topa and with a question

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

So San Fransico Girls are like Liverpool girls, you can go anywhere in your pj's then. :H

OMG Has this turned into the TOG thread, all we need to know is in duvets the higher the TOG rating the thicker and warmer the quilt will be. I dont know any of the science to it, never thought I would need to :H

HI MR Stuck, lovely of you to pop by, why does this thread scare you so much , and yes we should call and visit stuck on our road trip, HEHE this road trip is sounding real to me.

Will be back soon going to get a coffee not long woke up :H

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Im back, now regarding my great American adventure, I would have to plan it well, and obviously do some serious saving, so Im seriously thinking 2014, I know that seems that forever away but next year i am going on holiday with my sons so all my spare cash will go toward that. So as soon as Spain, and Christmas is over I will start a Great American Adventure Fund jar. If none of us win the lotto, I did the Euro on Friday, no luck AGAIN and no RV because we cant afford one or whatever, would I be able to go visiting people there, that would take too long wouldnt it, to visit everyone separately, I do have to get home for my family its not like I can just stay for months even if I wanted to. What is the best and cheapest way to get around America, is coach possible, that sounds cheaper that flights, or train, here train travel is stupid prices. How much is it to hire an RV? Oh well lots of time to think about it.

Re: the cd's, somewhere she does Trance Training, so to enter a trance like state, so I think that means to be awake but not alert, or something like that , so thats what Im trying to do anyway. If I actively try and listen I get all agitated and restless and it becomes impossible to actually do it, so I do have to kind of drift to somewhere, but not sleep In fact I will do one soon when I have finished this post.

It is really great to see you do such a good long post Play, we havent been hearing enough of you lately with bloody work stealing you away from us, I cant wait to spend time with you in Spain, I am soooo looking forward to it. Oh the place that was advertising the AllOne in stirling, with a union flag on its ad, when I went to order then turned to US dollars and wanted to mad p&p.

Just got to go for a min my son has been using my laptop and left his skype on and his friends keep calling him, I need to get him to log off. x

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I am gping to listen to a cd now

Hope you all have a good day

sending lots of love across the pond xx

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

This mornings meditation was wonderful, joy, happiness, excitement. Bliss.

I am not listening to them in the right order really, because when they where loaded onto the iPod they all came out os untiteled so I have to shuffle though, so mostly I leave it to fate. Today fate was good to me.

I just made my bed and have to tell you all, I dont bother with togs, I have a summer duvet, and a beautiful fleece blanket that I bought last year at a street amrket with picture of wolves in the moonlight on it. It is very warm and cost and I love it, so that goes over my summer duvet and makes me love both going to bed and making my bed :0

xx

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

REALLY want to post but have just been chatting to mum on Skype - always call her on a Sunday - have to go to work AGAIN and need to get my food ready so not a lot of time !!!! One more day then off on Tuesday! YEAH!

love and hugs to all XX Sun XX

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Morning!

Space! HA! HA! I am the same as Sun in knowing the temperatures – except I have 3 thermostats in my house plus one on my clock in bedroom.

Play – Look what I found! Cracking up ….
Urban Dictionary: clopen

And as for Landscape Guy – never was in the picture for future. WAAYYY too young. I would want to be with someone close to the same “stage of life” as I am, or perhaps a touch older than me. Old fashioned I guess. HA!

Laughing about Skype! I don’t know WHY I have never bought a cam! But, I was looking at my laptop the other day – and I THINK it has a cam built in. Need to test it on someone (after I get dressed) LOL

As for my awful insurance, I have Athem Blue Cross. So yes, I pay the first $5000 of ANYTHING and then another percentage of everything else until I hit my limit of “out of pocket” which if I remember correctly is about $10,000. UGH.

I picked up my mail last night and there is about 5-6 envelopes there from medical stuff. I just didn’t want to bum myself out last night and open them. HA! But – Must do that this morning and see where I stand on everything. I set up with the hospital to pay $250 a month, but I think I may ask them to drop that. Depends on what the others read. It’s just highway ROBBERY with these insurance companies!

And gas prices!!! GOOD GRIEF!! I needed gas coming home from the dog park with Charlie yesterday and they were topping $4.80 a gallon! They are predicting up to $6.00 within a few weeks if something doesn’t change. The poor Mom & Pop stations are dropping like flies. It’s really sad and I already have one employee that may leave just because his commute is too far and too expensive. And I drive almost 40 miles each way to the shop.

Some say there is a chance they may drop on Monday IF they are able to get the “summer rates” back. It’s so weird in California with the different gas we use here. For those that may not know, CA has the toughest regulations for air pollution from cars – hence the different mix in the fuel. Play - how is it in SF? I just drove home without filling up and will wait until Monday and see …..

I LOVE chickpeas and would love the recipe from either of you please? I’m also having a Team Sunday Brunch at my house on December 2nd – so looking for good recipes for that as well. Perhaps a strata or something. Must be vegetarian as much of my staff is vegan. One gal is bring a “French Toast casserole” – that should be interesting!

Oh and a TOG is: “The tog is a measure of thermal resistance of a unit area, also known as thermal insulance, commonly used in the textile industry, and often seen quoted on, for example, duvets and carpet underlay. The Shirley Institute in Manchester, England developed the tog as an easy-to-follow alternative to the SI unit of m2K/W. The name comes from the informal word "togs" for clothing which itself was probably derived from the word toga, a Roman garment.”

I had to look it up too before Sun explained it ….

And Play – like you, I would love to be back at the place of having 2 glasses of wine only, like I did on Topa. AND have some AF days because they DO feel so wonderful! But as with you, I must confess I really don’t want to totally quit – just be normal! It’s a bit the same with smoking for me. I have GFs that have a few cigarettes when out and having a few drinks, and then don’t smoke again for weeks or months. If I could do that, I wouldn’t worry so much about it or even try quitting. But I am for CERTAIN an all or nothing when it comes to smoking.

All in all I feel pretty good these days. A bit more energy and certainly feel like eating more! I think my scale is messed up though because I seem to bounce back and forth with 4-5 pounds up and down. And every DRs scale says something slightly different. I think I will tell most when I can see/feel it in my clothes.

Still drinking too much wine, but never to excess … just sipping away too much. *sigh* I am working on the starting times being later in the day as that is one BIG issue for me when I am home. Maybe when I start the Chantix and quit smoking I will get really fat and will be able to go back on Topa! HA! HA! Really don’t see that happening... but I can Dream!

Yesterday was pretty kicked back. I took Charlie to the dog park in the morning for a few hours and he wore himself out big time! It’s a really cute little park and I love the other people there and most of the dogs. Got into it a touch with one gal and her pit when he approached Charlie and tried to hump him. GRRRR. It is the one time I will hear Charlie slightly growl. I TOLD her and pulled her dog off Charlie. The second time he did it, I told her off a bit and to keep her dog under control. None of the others knew her or her dog and thankfully she left shortly after. I will not take any chances with Charlie after what happened and I will NEVER trust that breed – ever. So … the rest of the play time was quite lovely.

And to be honest, it’s really good for me as well. There is about a ? mile path around the place and through the pretty trees and such. We walked it perhaps 3-4 times yesterday with others and the dogs playing and chasing each other. No smoking allowed and a touch of exercise for me – so all good. =)

DeVas continues to be a little monster, albeit a cute one! HA! I LOVES to be held and is happy if you just walk around with him on your shoulder. He still has a slight cough, which is concerning me a bit, but hopefully ends soon. Sun, I looked up FIP in felines and everything I read says one of the major symptoms is loss of appetite. He is eating me out of house and home! HA! So no issue there! The Foster Director at the shelter was surprised to hear he was eating 2 small cans a day when I was picking up more food. Heck, yesterday he ate 3 and was screaming for more! I keep his dry food down 24/7 but he has little interest in it. At first I thought it was because he had a stuffed up nose and it didn’t smell too interesting – but now I think he is just plain spoiled! LOL

He has a new game and I must take pictures of it. I have this “wand” with something similar to a feather boa on it. He loves it! But now he will now go and get it himself and carry it over to Charlie’s tail and kind of wrap himself all up in it and the tail and play. It’s pretty funny and amazingly Charlie doesn’t seem to mind at all. =)

A slightly overcast morning but the sun will be out soon. (Space – it is 67 degrees in my office. LOL) Not sure what my day will bring but my desk is covered with Post It notes of what I SHOULD get done today. HA! I have yet to hear from my Ireland family … but I wonder if they flew into LA first and are spending time there. Or with my Brother-In-law (?) I has a few “missed calls” on my phone yesterday, but all blocked numbers so I am not sure if they tried to call or not.

STUCK! HA! We are too nice????? That’s funny! Stick around a bit … we have our moments. (chuckling).

OK – RV road trip. We need to plan this! Sun could fly to CA and we’ll give her my Jeep and put her up in hotels along the way. HA! Then we would have a car to tour with and she can spot out the good places for when we arrive at each stop! On a serious note, they ARE pretty inexpensive to rent – it’s just the darn gas costs! Hummm, this is a great time to buy one! LOL And yes! Must stop and see Stuck! Space – it IS a real trip! =)

“The Great American Adventure” ! Love it! And yes Space – we are mostly QUITE spread out and people often forget how large this country is. It would take 3-4 days to drive or bus from me to Sun for example. Play and I are about an 8 -9 hour drive apart. Nora is a few hours from me. Houtx is a LONG ways as well. I vote we meet in CA and road trip down the Great Highway!

Ok … on with my day. And Post It notes!

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I do want to get back to you WTE but to tired just now, I had another stressful Sunday with my family here for dinner. My god why cant we just sit and have a meal without having to have the tv on for my mum and my daughter winding my and her up. Today my mum decided two arguments between me and my daughter over stuff Id spoken to her about. Theres really no need for it all, talk about dysfunctianal family, next week I am setting the table in the kitchen and she will have to eat out here. like it or lump it I cant take it any more.

She then started making comment about what I told her about my drinking a lager, she said I thought you didnt drink, or is it you do drink, Oh I cant remember what it is these days, and I really did think she was going to tell them and was nearly crying at one point, sometimes I think we get on so well and I love her so much and then other times like today she goes and does this.

Ive got to go now anyway Im so emotionally worm out by today

EDIT : Im sorry I wrote that now, I realise my mum is very old and also very selfish, so I need to just leave it and try not to think about it anymore, so I dont knbow whether or not to deleate, but because I dont like deleating my truth I wont, but I dont want to relive it if you all know what I mean, in other words, I would rather you not mention her to me.

xx

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I dont know if youve all been introduced to the biggest arsehole of my family yet, my brother, thi evening he was up to his dirty tricks again, playing games and guess what, I got a bit upset when I heard what he had done, came out into the kitchen to down a can, saw the sinkful of dishes and decided to wash them first !!!!! and the next thing I knew it was 30mins later when I was opening the can totally calmer and not ready to just down it and with no intention of getting pissed. What a change eh? I used to have drank a bottle of vodka then phone him and give him loads down the phone for what he had done to me and he could then make me look like the baddie, well no more... so, I have drank that can, been to the shop for more and also cigarettes and am on my second, I dont know if I will have more than two tonight but I do know I| wont be getting pissed, well I hope I wont, to tell you the truth I do feel a bit wired with anger now that I could still stay up drinking instead of being able to just go to bed but we will see what happens, I know for sure there wont be any 6am stuff tho :H

I dont know what I would do without you all

xx

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi everyone. NUM NUM NUM. just eating some veggie bacon and cheese on toast - I will probably be asleep within 30 mins as my body is NOT used to this much fat - but oh gosh it is SO good !!! AND I think it is Guinness O'clock just to add to it - LOL. It is only 6.30 and this tastes just SO good - as i said - NUM NUM NUM.

Anyway - before I fall asleep - I wanted to post - Space - so good to read your posts - you are sounding SO much better. I read the one this morning and just went "aawww" and then read the one this evening and went 'aawww" again . You are so sweet and having chatted with you as well on skype, just know this to be true. I am sorry that your Sunday lunch didn't turn out terribly well - but did have to laugh to myself - isn't that what ALL Sunday lunches in UK are about? LOL Hang in there my friend - I know where you are coming from - :H:H been there done that!!!

WTE - that really cracked me up - fancy them knowing MY word !!!!! I had no idea that it was a REAL word - actually IN the Dictionary!!!!! WOW !!!! LOL for you looking it up!

Also thank you for explaining the Tog to everyone.

You will have to PM me your Skype name - or I will PM you mine and you can add me - and we shall see if you do indeed have the camera! I never worry about being hair brushed or make up on - not that my make up takes longer than 30 seconds anyway - LOL.

I am not sure what petrol is here right now - about $3.90 I think. Not sure though. Hubs drives 48 miles each way to work 5 days a week - Yuck.

I am more than happy to send you the chickpea recipe - it is really yummy and so easy to make. I also have a great strata recipe which is veggie although not vegan although one could adapt in easily enough I think...... I will e-mail you.

I would LOVE to see the pics of DeVas playing with his toy and Charlie's tail! Sounds hilarious! I do hope that you are right about the FIP WTE - the loss of appetite doesn't always follow. The canned stuff is something cats love whenever....... hate to sound like a wet blanket.

Okay - I want to write more, but knew this would happen. TOO much cheese and bacon (veggie) - too much fat - I am starting to fall asleep.

Will have to carry on tomorrow. Sorry people. I knew when I made two slices that I was overdoing it. I know my body and knew what I was doing. It is as if I am drugged. GOT to go to sleep!!!!

love and hugs

Sun XXXXX

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Loved Ones, just checking in for a few moments, to say how much of a family you have become for me, the first ones I think of in the morning and the last ones I think of before going to sleep.

So I'm home after the first part of my clopen, up super early for the open part, can't believe it is in the dictionary. Sun please send the recipe around would you.

Space, not sure what CD you liked so much but just keep listening to them in whatever order they come up, it really doesn't matter at all, they will work just the same, and don't under estimate them, the magic might not all be due to topa the mind is the most powerful of all. And yes of course, the America trip is of course real, no question about it, we are a family now.

Ok, much more but gotta get to sleep, love,
Play

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

OK this is my second attempt at this post just pressed a wrong key and lost the last one.

WTE, I agree the gardener guy was always too young its such a pity hes causing you so much trouble now tho, I hope he see's sense soon and sorts it out.

I dont think Ive ever tasted a chickpea, and that is what we call them here, Ive never heard of the other name that was used, I just never known what to do with them. So I would like a recipe please as well. In fact, could it be a starter for Xmas dinner.

I too dont want to be AF, I want to be normal and be able to have a drink if I want one but not go overboard and not be obsessed by drink when Im not drinking. AND not getting drunk. Smoking is different, I know I need to stop totally with that, and I want to do it this year really, well my first goal with smoking is to get one day without a cigarette, not in that AA way, I actaully mean get one day because i dont think I have had a day without smoking since I was 15 when I started working. And yesterdays marking down on the paper wrapped round the box with a elastic band went crap. I have ordered Paul McKenna's Quit Smoking book and cd and am going to just spend a day with that to read, listen to the cd and get in nice things to eat and try to do the day that way. That to me would be a massive achievement. These types of books secondhand on Amazon are great, lots of them are around ?2.00. Bargain eh. Because Im me tho I want all of them there are about 10 in the series, I can change your life, I can make you Rich, Instant Confidence, you get the drift, so I really have to work hard to stop myself getting bargains when its a book and a cd saying it will change my life for the better for ?1.98 with free p&p

I have done my meditation for today, I did the moderation one, has anyone else done theres, are you doing them WTE? the WEndi ones.

I cant believe two peices of bacon (veggie) and cheese on toast knock you out Sun you are so funny, no wonder you are so slim.

I love the word Clopen and did think you thought it up Sun, isnt it wierd that it is a real dictionary word. :H

Got to go now, xoxo

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Good Morning everyone. Well - I crashed after the cheese on toast - it feels as if I am drugged sometimes when I eat - tomato soup does it to me too for some reason - maybe 'cos it is high in sugar? Anyway I slept for about two hours then woke up, and got ready for bed. Went to sleep at 9.00, hubs got up and fed the dogs this morning (!!) and I didn't wake up until 9.15 - so I had total of 14 hours sleep last night !!!! I must have needed it. I knew I was tired - ha ha ha. I close tonight and then am off tomorrow thank goodness.

Space - I have that book and CD by Paul McKenna - the smoking one, but have never listened to it - you will have to let me know what it is like! I had planned on listening to the wendi CD last night but obviously didn't.

The chickpea recipe I think I will post in the recipe section here on the website. It is so simple and really tasty. I have another recipe for them that is called No-Tuna salad which I already posted in the recipe section here.

Yes Space - I thought I thought up the word Clopen too - funny isn't it that it was in the urban dictionary!!

Play - I agree with this group here being a part of our family - I too feel that way and check in first thing in the morning and also last thing at night and love when there is a new post to read......

WTE - I cannot in my wildest dreams ever see you being too fat! Even when you quit smoking! When I have quit before I usually gain about 3-4lbs but that is generally it.

The dog park where you take Charlie sounds nice - I am glad that lady left with her nasty dog.... I think I would have left after you had TOLD me too - LOL - I think you can be scary!! I am so happy that you are feeling a bit better these days - we had a customer come in (a regular) and he had some issues with his kidneys and said that he hasn't been feeling well for ages and now after they have done something - too long to go into, he said that he still doesn't have any energy or feel that well, so obviously anything to do with the kidneys takes a while to bounce back from.

HI STUCK - nice to see you here - come and join in with us - we won't be nice if you don't want us to be - LOL

WTE - I like the idea of me driving along in the jeep on the road trip!! And staying in hotels! Scouting out the areas - that sounds like a plan.....

I think I might go and make a cup of milky coffee and sit outside with the dogs - it is very chilly out - only 41, but the sky is blue and the sun is shining. Then I must shower and hairwash for work. One more day.........

love and hugs to all - where are you WU????

love, Sun XXXXX

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Did have to laugh - in my post this morning I put "I love checking last thing at night and there is a new post to read". Just got in from work. The last post....... WAS MINE FROM THIS MORNING. Oh well - I suppose there can't ALWAYS be a new one - LOL.

I am so pleased I am off tomorrow. I really am feeling so burned out right now. I have no idea why - I really do love my job usually. I wish I could go back to my 60mg Celexa. I really do think that is the problem. I would hate to try another AD though. I tried a couple before finding celexa and it isn't bad - it just isn't hacking it for me on the lower dose.

I have nice shifts this week which is good - as I worked Sunday and then closed tonight I have no more closes - so that is good. I need to sort my clothes sometime this week and also plan on going into St Louis tomorrow to a wonderful bread shop and getting half a dozen loaves of this awesome bread and freezing it. Around here there is nothing really good.

I am waffling. I am going to get a Guinness and read for a little while and unwind then get to bed.

WU - where are you?

Hugs, Sun XXX

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Regarding Being Normal Drinkers!

Hi Gang, I say that with a big Affectionate Smile, I still have quite alot of catching up to do but I want to throw out my thoughts on that I hear so many of us hear saying the same thing, "we want to be normal drinkers", so my thinking goes something like this, and this is also more about us being kind of reluctant to really get in there and do something.

So, Normal drinkers can take it or leave it, normal drinkers don't think of drinking during the day and how great it will be to have that drink after work or as soon as it is 12 noon somewhere in the world:H, normal drinkers just have a drink when they are in a situation that they want to have a drink, and otherwise it is not an issue, they don't have to make an effort to have AF days or keep a chart or anything else, they just don't think about it. So now how are we thinking about being normal drinkers?

Well, we are being very resistive to trying to bring about any kind of change, we do recognize this, we have said that we don't know why we are so resistive to trying, we seem to be unable to motivate ourselves, we say that we don't want to totally quit but we can see that is not a valid reason that we hold back, this is all just the nature of addiction I suppose.

Now,I think the biggest obstacle to being a normal drinker is "cravings", so we need to use whatever we can to extinguish the cravings and not fight against it. So, we pretty much are using Topa, Alan Carr, Supplements, and now maybe starting to use Hypnotherapy, so if we will use them and these programs start to extinguish our cravings why would we fight against them and say, "but I don't want to stop completely" well, because that is the nature of alcohol addiction.

But now look, if we will let ourselves go with the flow, don't fight against it, if we are lucky enough to have the cravings go away, that doesn't mean we can never have another glass of wine or a Guinness, it means just the opposite, it means that we might be able to be normal drinkers, this might just sound good enough to our alcohol addicted brains to enable us to "Go For It":goodjob: Perhaps we can make some headway.

Now, this is not meant for just any one person of us, just us all.

And I want to say Space that you really inspired me so much with your last couple of posts, as well as many posts before that. I can see that you are really making such an effort, just like you have made for such a long time. You have actually started listening to the CDs just like you have tried every other thing that has been put before you.

I remember when I first started reading your thread quite some time ago, it is the only one that I ever read besides ours here, and now I sometimes say hi to Stuck, because you were friends with him, but, I remember how much I admired you because you just never seemed to give up in trying to find something or some way to find your way out of your Alcohol Hell, and what I guess I am trying to say is that you are one of the most determined and focused and caring people that I have ever met and I am so happy to have you for my friend:h

So now, let's all make a group effort to put out a little mor energy to become normal drinkers, that's what we all want, we have the tools to make it happen, I can make CDs for anyone who wants them, maybe we can have a book discussion night, I have another interesting book that I am going to forward to the ones that I have emails for, I think you will find it interesting, it's not about alcohol.

Ok, love you,
Play

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Play - you need to empty your PM box...... I am off to bed now...

love and hugs XXX