New here and starting Topa and with a question

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I will be interested in how the AB works for people. I also wonder how sick does someone get.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

VERY quick reply - Meggie - if you drink after taking antabuse - you get VERY sick - I mean seriously ill - possibly hospital. The Antabuse stops your body metabolizing the Al so it poisons you. You can possibly die if you drink after taking Ab. It causes flushing, racing heartbeat and a drop in blood pressure. It can also cause nausea, headache and shortness of breath. I watched a friend of mine drink after taking an Antabuse - I didn't know she had taken it - and it was scary to watch. I thought she was having a heart attack. There is NO way that I would ever ever drink after taking an antabuse for at least four days - depending on how much i took. I am planning on taking a half of a 250mg tab on Monday lunchtime and then probably having a drink saturday late afternoon. But I will go very slowly....... and be careful!!

Teezah - you make me smile. I know other folk have complained elsewhere about this thread not being about Topa - but I love this thread. I have made some wonderful friends here, and am happy being here - also it is great when someone comes along needing advice on Topa !! It is lovely that you are joining our happy family !!

I wonder if I should get some of that Modalert stuff...... Do you think it helped you in the things like forgetting words and so on? Although maybe stopping for 5 out of 7 days will stop the remaining brain cells that I have being killed off so I might not need the Modalert! LOL I do still take Topa but just 100mg a day. Not sure why - I am not sure it actually does anything for me.......It might be that I am at that age where the weight starts spreading and I like the weight I am at? I think if I came off the topa, I might start to put weight on and am happy where I am.

My job is extremely physical now, so I think my weight might go up anyway - I will most definitely be gaining some muscle that is for sure !! My day flies by at work now. ALL hefting and lugging and moving - LOVELY !!!!

Oh - and Teezah - I cannot imagine being in the UK and trying to control ones drinking. I am English and living in USA. I was weaned on Guinness practically. I admire anyone in UK who manages to stop - it must be way harder than here - there are no pubs as such - not where I live anyway - and we never go out and socialize like in England. Everyone that I knew when I still lived there, drank - all my rellies drank - I mean - it was just what everyone did !! So good for you - well done !!!!

Oh - Ally's dad is visiting so she might be otherwsie occupied for a while. I am sure she will be here when she can.

Well - need to go and feed the hounds then think about what I am going to eat too...
love and hugs to all,

love, sun XXX

[Hippyman]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

:wd::wd::wd: Sunny I am glad you are trying Antabuse. It's my safety net and my friend! :goodjob:

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

HI HIPPY !!!! lovely to see you here - yes - I am going to try AB. Not sure if you have seen what I am doing - but I am starting on Monday. Taking it Monday and then possibly having a drink on the saturday - if I want to......... I feel good about this. Linda and I are doing it together - thanks heavens for support !!!!!! I am not sure that either of us would do it alone. She is a wonderful friend. We are hoping to try to control our drinking this way - I cannot imagine ever not drinking again - I don't want to never drink again - if that makes sense? I will see how it goes, but feel good about the whole thing.

love and hugs, Sun XXx

[Hippyman]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

sunshinedaisies;1459399 wrote: HI HIPPY !!!! lovely to see you here - yes - I am going to try AB. Not sure if you have seen what I am doing - but I am starting on Monday. Taking it Monday and then possibly having a drink on the saturday - if I want to......... I feel good about this. Linda and I are doing it together - thanks heavens for support !!!!!! I am not sure that either of us would do it alone. She is a wonderful friend. We are hoping to try to control our drinking this way - I cannot imagine ever not drinking again - I don't want to never drink again - if that makes sense? I will see how it goes, but feel good about the whole thing.

love and hugs, Sun XXx

The Antabuse makes sure you have completely clean and sober time when you want it. If you decide you want to drink you have to really think about it and prepare way ahead of time. I think it's a good thing not to be able to impulse drink. Now if they had a pill that would stop me from buying that impulse candy bar while standing at the check out line...:H

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hippyman - I am so lucky that I don't have that pull to the candy bar at the check out !!!! I stand there and look at them and think "nah......."

I did have a real craving for Starbucks Cranberry Bliss Bar - OMG !!!!! It was AWESOME !!! They were stopping it as it was seasonal so I bought our local Starbucks out - 3 boxes with 6 in each box !!!!! They went in the freezer but didn't last long and now I have found a recipe on line for it...........

There USED to be a tablet called Sugar Enders (I think) that made anything sweet taste really blah - but it didn't take off. Such a shame. It really did work. When you took it, anything sweet that you took after that just tasted yuck. I suppose folk just don't want it.

Hugs, sun XXX

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Sun: you have no pubs near you!? Good God, what do you do during the eveningtime? Every apartment I've ever moved into I picked because of the pubs nearby! Well, except the one on the ocean, but that one was on the ocean. And beach drinkin' is good drinkin', as long as you don't drown.

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Stuck you CRACK ME UP and well, yes, Sun lives, well, no where near anything much, haha, not really.

[houtx]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Dammit!! Thought I was signed in, all that...post gone!! UGH

Basically, good to hear from everyone, worried but interested in the AB experience from Sunny & PLay. Keep us posted. Love this site for all matter of postings. Lets not spin off - it would lose many of us.

Trying to go to see WTE on my spring break in early March...fares are ridiculously high. PLus am booking a trip to go see a boitoi in Puerto Rico in July. UGH - how to juggle/balance/book these 2 trips is a trip in-itself. Will figure it out!!

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi, I thought I was too tired to come to the thread, but of course I had to see what was going on and so now I need to post a little. First off for Teezah, and this is also one of of the topics on my list, if you will go to page 147, that is where I first started posting, a little over a year ago, I actually posted alot about my history, side effects on starting Topa and what a miracle it was for me and also about how it felt to be experiencing life rather than covering it up all the time, Space I have more to you on that subject also.

And if you read far enough you can see why I stopped the topa the first time and now I'm back in the same old spot, but hopefully that is going to change.

Also Teezah, I rather agree with you on the philosophy of the AA, that you are an alcoholic and will always be one and are powerless, and I think probably the best of it is the community, just as you said. I've never been to a meeting but I know in my gut that it would be way to rigid and confining for me.

When I started reading back last night, I could hardly believe all the people back then, there are lots of us now too of course, but there were people who were around for awhile and then gone and after they stopped posting for long enough, I see that I kind of forgot about them, out of sight, out of mind, I suppose. But they were really great people and now I'm wondering where they all have gone.

Here are some of those special people: Midnight, Australia, Bruunhilde (she has her own thread now), MWOLady, LadyLush, houtx (we still have her), shushu, Mommy, MtnMama, blondie, Wildflowers (she is on other threads), 2Run, jimmyjam, LostButFound.

Well, that is just a list of people up to page 164, it is so amazing to read back thru those posts, at that time it was kind of me and sun carrying the thread along. Sun had been there from the very start of the thread but the thread has come so far since then. I wonder what has become of those dear friends that posted during that time, a few posts or many posts, non of them are with us today except for Houtx, and there are others also I just don't have time to read everything right now, i'm also remembering, RainyDay, Wu, oh my, I feel like there are some missing friends.

So now Teezah, don't have any worries that us old tymers won't stay around, this thread kind of seems like a very important part of our lives, we aren't going anywhere.

So, oh my gosh, so much more to post and no more time tonight, but I got one thing off the list.

Something else that has struck me is that when I read back a bit I realize how much I actually missed of what someone said, even tho I read it, it didn't register, why is that? was I thinking too much about myself? drinking too much? just not paying attention to what I was reading?

So, what brought that up especially was something back a bit that Space talked about, about things coming up spontaneously that were hard to deal with, and that she wondered if it was because she was off the alcohol and now wants to have to deal with them rather than cover them up but doesn't know if she is strong enough.

I am having the exact same experience since i'm off the Zoloft and probably more when I have some AL free days. I had it also back when I first started the Topa but then covered it up again when I started drinking again.

So, I guess I will leave it here and do another topic about this tomorrow or sunday.

I'm so glad to have you all here as my friends, thank you:h

peace, play

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi friends, it is great to wake up and see all the posts today there are a few things I want to say after reading them so will start with one and then have to break to go and get a coffee

Teezah it is wonderfull that you are here and we are all still together no matter whether we are still taking topa or not I know I am glad to be of any help I can to you and so happy that you are doing so well. You will have to let me know more about the modalert it sounds very interesting, I have heard of it before and did send away to get some at some time ago but dont know what happened to it. I think this is the most supportive thread and dont know what I would do without my friends on here.

Sun I dont know people where complaining about us, I dont understand why they would.

Ok now I cant remember what else I was goind to say, I need that coffee

[spacebebe01]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Ok Im back

Stuck when you say you lived on the ocean did you live on a boat or something, I have visions of you being shanghaied and given only rum for your work.

Play what a wonderful post, you have so much feeling and insight. I think you where going to Spain when I joined the thread and had run out of topa, I always thought thats why you stopped taking it the first time, I kind of think that the epilim I am taking now has some of the topa dopa type effect as I definately seem to be even more forgetful and get confused but I dont work so I am ok to put up with it. It is a massive thing tho to even cook a meal now tho as I dont seem to be able to think straight to get things in and out of the over and do the timing. More importantly tho is the thing with stuff coming up that we have never dealt with. Why have you come off the Zooloft? that is a big thing, how are you feeling, I dont think I will ever be able to come off ad's, even forgetting one messes me up. I am trying to think what we can do about this thing with the crap coming up, maybe we could start to skype or email or pm more, I feel like Ive been such a crap friend to both you and Sun and have been way too wrapped up in myself over the past few months. Please let me know if there is anything I can do, that goes for anyone else here as well.

Dizzy how are you doing, I do miss you so much, it was you who I used to talk to most when I first came to this thread, I think because of time zones we would chat during the day. Its ok tho for you not to feel up to posting much, just know that I am thinking of you.

Sun I am so happy that you like your new job, it sounds great. Why on earth tho are you worried about your weight??? in any case you will get more muscle and firm up with the job but your hardly likely to go bulking up like a weight lifter are you you are perfect so please dont worry about it

I have noticed that I have started eating sweet stuff lately, I didnt used to eat much but I even have a pack of biscuits on my bedside table and have been eating chocolate and ice creams of an evening, I really cant do with putting on any more weight but dont feel able to do anything about it right now. I cant take the feeling of failure again when I try and yet dont loose weight, this is just not the right time to put myself under pressure about it I dont think but then know the longer I leave it the more I risk putting on.

Yesterday I got up, showered and went to meet my daughter for shopping and coffee at my local retail park (mal) at 10.30. After all the time I have been spending in bed and not bothering to get washed and dressed I had been worried about getting there so I was made up I managed it and we had a nice morning. However after getting home I fell asleep in the afternoon so still missed half of the day. Anyway I was thinking of drink yesterday and trying to recreate the feelings it used to give me but that seems like a lifetime away, as does the person I was around 7 or 8 years ago. That person has gone now but the thing that worries me is that I was such a mess then but had energy and a zest for life that has also gone. I dont actually know why I am typing this here, maybe I am hoping that by putting it out there things will start to become clearer to me.

Im just off to the shop for cigarettes now

xx

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Oh my god, Space, I almost spit my coffee out through my nose. That's a really funny picture, me being shanghaied and dragged off to sea. (In my vision of it, of course, it's a really nice boat run by bikini-clad Malibu housewives, but hey, as long as they give me rum... ) But no, the last place I lived before moving to where I am now was one block from the beach, so I could walk down to the water whenever I wanted and hang out on the beach, or just watch people biking and jogging along the coast, or whatever.

And there were still pubs there too and I walked to them every night and my Lord I don't know how anyone can keep themselves busy or remotely entertained without them! Er, um, sorry Sun, not sure what came over me there.

[teezah]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Play ? hoping to go back and read your topa story as soon as, but life, in the form of children, keeps getting in the way! I?m on my own 50% of the time as my other half works away so it can be pretty intense. I too came off AD?s last year, around August / September time so I?m really keen to hear your take on the experience because from what you have hinted at so far it sounds like a similar story to mine?suffice to say I have felt like my life has been a white knuckle ride at some points over the last 6 months!

Sun / Space ? since increasing to 75mg on the topa, it?s been a struggle to get moving. I?ve just felt really tired and really ? yes, dopey. So RJ?s solution is to try a nootropic to counteract this. I took 50mg modalert yesterday morning and the same this morning and it really did make me feel a lot more alert. I have ?been there? for the kids all day, been on the ball, and managed to make up all disabled d?s feeds and meds no problems (I had been having to check & double check everything). The only concern I may have is the quality of sleep I had last night, but that may not have been due to the drug. I?ll report back tomorrow over whether or not I sleep well tonight. I certainly do not feel wired or buzzed or anything like that which was what I was concerned about. It?s a good feeling ? just being in control, on the ball?on top form!

& Sun ? Whisky was used as teething medicine in Scotland, oh yes, and to get your baby off to sleep (I never did that to mine!!) :eeks:

Hippyman ? good to see you coming by to give play & sun encouragement!

Stuck ? hilarious!! Desperate Malibu Housewives ? except I typed that midwives by mistake first!

Hi Houtx - hope you get your travel plans sorted!

[teezah]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

spacebebe01;1459694 wrote:
Anyway I was thinking of drink yesterday and trying to recreate the feelings it used to give me but that seems like a lifetime away, as does the person I was around 7 or 8 years ago. That person has gone now but the thing that worries me is that I was such a mess then but had energy and a zest for life that has also gone. I dont actually know why I am typing this here, maybe I am hoping that by putting it out there things will start to become clearer to me.

Space, my heart goes out to you :h

something is trying to get out and become clearer to you - keep typing...

I'm not very good with insights - especially since I don't know you well, but others are, and may have some very good suggestions for you.

:l