New here and starting Topa and with a question

[houtx770]

I'm definitely going to have to find another full-time job. Whether it be related to teaching (but hopefully not in the classroom) or business-related, I feel really confident I will be ok. I went in person to turn in my retirement notification Friday ( the district offered bonuses for early notification - mine will be $5K so I was pretty motivated. It's not much, but enough to keep me from teaching summer school!)...my daughter & I went and celebrated with a fun happy hour afterwards! The rest of the weekend was great - went to my friend's country house & hung out for a night, shopping the groovy shops in town, drinking wine & smoking a toke or two! Hanging out at home, enjoying my 5-day long weekend...and looking forward to more! I have 36+ days of sick leave accumulated I need to take or I'll lose it. It used to be we'd be paid for unused sick leave...not anymore. So I foresee many long weekends & perhaps most of the month of May off!! Excited for what's to come!

[meggie]

Wow, good for you. I am working one more year. I will be 60 and my daughter can have one more year of insurance. Our recent raises make it beneficial to do the year. I will have 200 sick days and it will be 32.5 years. Wow, where did the time go. The only difference is I can tell I am tired and getting up in morning is hard. I love my mornings of sitting around, watching the news or reading. I can't believe they don't pay you for your sick days. I will get 80 dollars for each sick day and it will pay for my health insurance.
Our state offers incentives, but didn't this year and they may never offer it again. The last incentive would have given me 17,000 dollars. I would love to have that.
One thing I can say, I think I am a better teacher now then I was years ago. I am taking classes, adding technology, and having fun with the kiddos. The big thing is what will they do to me, fire me.
I see my daughter fearful to bring in different material because she wants to remain part of the boring culture.
Best of luck, I assume you will be finished in early June.
t

[houtx770]

Yes, Meggie, end of May I'll be done. Thats so great you get paid for unused sick leave. We get screwed...so I worked it out today and will be taking every Fri & Mon off for the rest of the year then 3 weeks in May!! Sheesh! Hope I get a good tax refund and can take some trips! I'm excited - not only for the time off, but also the next adventure! Hope alls well w/ everyone

[meggie]

Your district is crazy, they will still have to pay for a sub for all those days. With 200 days I would have to take all next year off. That might be nice. Everyone says you will know when the time is right, I hope so. As I write this now, I am wishing for a delay and I won't get one. I am just tired. Let's keep in touch. I want to live your new journey with you.

[houtx770]

Yes, Houston ISD is pretty screwy in what they offer as far as unused sick leave days. Basically, when one retires, those days are lost, so over the years I've seen teachers taking huge chunks of time off & very weird ways they work to get them used up. Here I am in the same position! I've worked out 2-3 days every week from now until May, mostly Fri/Mon; plus we have Spring Break & Easter...taking days off before & after; then 2 1/2 weeks the first weeks of May!! I plan on traveling and honing my skills for the next adventure job I'll be pursuing. I really think I am still employable...we shall see!

Hope alls well w/ everyone!
XXXOOO

[gonetomaui]

Hi. I'm on between 25mg-50mg of topomax, 150 mg of lithium, I also started back on 100mg of Wellbutrin today. (I'm med sensitive, so I take low doses)

I have ZERO craving for alcohol and I was a binger and thought about drinking most the time, and used it for stress and to calm down.

I went off these meds once and went to the bar and slammed drinks within a week like I was on auto-pilot...typical night. That was the last night of drinking.

I have struggled my whole life..even did AA once for 8 year.

The meds seem to be the missing link for me. I'm diagnosed bi-polar now. I feel stabilized, less impulsive, less reactive, calmer, more content, focused.

I'm so grateful the craving is gone. I'm saving money by not wanting to go to a nice dinner everynight and have 2-3 drinks. It really is a relief. I'm actually thinking about goals, and planning hobbies and my future.

I wish I knew about these meds years ago. I'm glad I found this site "my way out" today !

Thanks !!

[meggie]

I am trying meds and they don't appear to be working for me. I will plug on. I am happy for you. Wish I didn't want to drink.
Houtx, Texas is crazy, they would have to pay a sub the same for those sick days. I think they pay 80 dollars for the days and pay a certified sub 95 dollars. I can sub for 125 dollars a day when I retire.
I hope my Master's degree would make me employable for something. Keep informed with what is going on.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I am trying meds and they don't appear to be working for me. I will plug on.

Meggie, I don't know what kind of meds you are taking but I'll share my experience with my own medications.



I am taking baclofen to deal with the alcohol. But a little more than a year ago, I was suffering from depression. I started taking a low dose of an antidepressant in Dec. 2014. It wasn't until May or June of 2015 that my doctor and I found the right combination of medications to really deal with the depression. I didn't feel like I could deal with the drinking (even though I've been on baclofen for years) until I'd dealt with the depression.



It sounds a little like that is what happened with gonetomaui...S/he got the right combination of mental health meds and between that and the topa can deal with the cravings. I guess, anyway.



Good luck and hang in there.

[sunshinedaisies]

Meggie - the Nal IS working - it took me 11 months as you know. PLEASE do not assume it isn't working. Have you gone up to 50mg yet? if not then once you do, it might be that you are basically starting again from scratch - I do not know, but the book was about taking 50mg for this and I know that you were not taking 50 for a while. I KNOW it is hard - been there, done that - but you have to have faith and patience. I never gave up - always knew that it would eventually work. Hang in there - please?

hugs, Sun x

[meggie]

Thanks Sun, I am just a little depressed. I thought things looked good in November but December I am back to the same drinking. I have been up to the 50 since November . I will have to see. Thanks for the encouragement, I need it now.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I've been reading up on Nal for the new forum we're creating (do you guys know about that?) and from everything I've seen and read, it can take a while but it really can work wonders.

Hang in there, Meggie.

[houtx770]

Hope alls well with everyone! I'm interested in the new NAL thread...keep us posted. I'm doing fine. Same as ever. Drinking every night but not getting shit-faced passed out drunk. A few blank periods but not a huge problem. I wish everyone positive vibes from Houston, TX <3

[meggie]

Still on the Nal and I am also drinking about 4 to 5 drinks of vodka a night. I don't see much difference with the Nal, I hope all is well with you. I took yesterday off to use a sick day. I don't plan on giving back any days for free. It was a nice day, I did have to get blood work. Everyone around has next week off, but we only have Monday and Tuesday. Then we don't have our Easter break until the end of April. It is going to be a long haul. I hope I make it through the next year.

[sunshinedaisies]

Houtx - do you mean that you are interested in trying the Nal again?

Meggie - sorry things are going just the same - but to be honest, although my intake went down slightly once I started Nal, it stayed more or less the same for the whole time I was on Nal - then suddenly the desire was gone. Pre nal, I was getting up to 6 Guinness a night - while I was on Nal, it was stable at around 4, and rarely did I go above that - it was easier to have AF days too with the nal, after a while. But up until I stopped, I was having pretty much 4 each day. I keep saying, you HAVE to have faith that this will work - there is no alternative - a few folk took way longer than the norm - so hang in there!

Hugs, Sun x

[meggie]

I did get a private post from someone that said it took them 15 months and they woke up and didn't care to have a drink. I am praying that will be me.