Well I did it...

[hangingoninFL]

I got tired of this titrating up and down and since I really had nothing else to do this weekend I decided to jump in with both feet. Starting yesterday (Saturday) morning around 8 I took 30mg per hour for about 12 hours (so 360 total for the day), but I did not hit the switch since I still drank (a little) last night. Today I have taken 35 mg per hour which is where I am at right now (Sunday around 6:30PM). But, I think I may have hit the switch!! Normally I watch the clock for 5 o'clock to roll around which is when I give myself permission to drink. I was watching TV and didn't even realize that it was way past 5. I still have not had any deisire to pick up yet this evening Hopefully I'm not a bit premature in posting this since the night is not over yet.

As some background info, prior to this weekend I had titrated up to 260. I had actually reached 250 a few weeks earlier but I had to back it down because it was affecting my performance at work. At high doses I find myself kind of tounge-tied, similar to the slurring of words that occurs when I am intoxicated (I was afraid my bosses and co-workers would think I was drinking at work!)

As you might expect, SEs are pretty severe. The only new one is hearing weird imaginary noises, very disconcerting at first but I have gotten accustomed to them by now. I am also having some difficulty typing this because of my visual "blips" and muscle twitching in my hands, but these were SEs I had previously experienced (so please forgive any typos in this post).

I obviously don't recommend this for the faint of heart, but I just felt it was what I needed to do. I will need to start titrating down by tomorrow evening since I have to go to work on Tuesday, so we shall see if that causes me to relapse. I will keep you posted.

[moglor]

Well I did it...

What is your body weight? Ameisen predicted the switch at around 2.4mg/kg. Be careful when titrating down rapidly. It's easy to go too far and relapse yourself. Also, whenever you increase the dose, I've found it necessary to stay at the higher dose for a couple days before the effects are obvious (especially SEs.)

[Lo0p]

Well I did it...

hangingoninFL;988729 wrote: I still have not had any deisire to pick up yet this evening Hopefully I'm not a bit premature in posting this since the night is not over yet.

That's great!! Don't be discouraged if you get a craving to drink tonight. And by that I mean, don't get discouraged AT ALL. It took me 3 days at the same high dose to hit my switch. And I had all those SE's and the general disinterest in drinking late into the night until I finally drank the first two nights.

[ignominous]

Well I did it...

Sounds like great news Hangin.

Be careful about titrating down to fast as Mog pointed out

It seems that the Bac can take about 5 days to build up to full strength in your system. So if you don't drink tonight maybe you really have hit your 'switch'. If its right that the Bac takes 5 days to reach full strength in your brain then tomorrow you'll be well past your 'switch' level and the next day you'll be very well past your switch ..........and the next day you'll be extra very well past your switch. And so on until 5-7 days have elapsed after leveling of your dose. Hope this makes some sense.

Therefore if you don't drink tonight and you think you've hit the proverbial 'switch' I personally would suggest reducing your last dose tonight by 10 or 20mg and then leave the dose there for a couple of weeks. Frankly I think the SEs are going to get worse for the next few days anyway as the Bac builds up in your system/CNS/brain. Don't fuck around with it too much now that you've come so far, let your body become accustomed to not drinking before titrating/tapering down off the Bac.

In all honesty if you go absent from work for the next 2 weeks and then show up bright eyed and in control I think they might forgive you. If not, as a functioning alcoholic you've been able to hold the job down imagine what you'll be like when you don't drink. Awesome! You'll probably get a better job. The italics are just a thought that I've thrown in there, in light of the present world economic situation fell free to completely ignore and discard it!

I think I've made the point I was trying to. I can't remember off hand how long you've wanted to be alcohol free but judging by your methods its something you truly desire. So put up with the SEs if you can for a few days. They may get worse initially but I'm confident that within one short week they will begin to subside.

Anyway, CONGRATS and keep us informed what you are doing. I love willing guinea pigs.

[ignominous]

Well I did it...

Even if your drinking when you read this, let us/me know!

[Dabhar]

Well I did it...

Well said ignominous...I concur.

Good luck to you, Hangin! We are here for you!!!

Please let us know how you are doing.

Take care
Dab

[PhoenixRising]

Well I did it...

AWESOME!!!!! You da man!!

[help4me]

Well I did it...

How are you feeling today (Monday) Hangin'?

I'm right there with you. I started on BAC about 2 weeks ago and I decided to start titrating up yesterday (Sunday). I had been at about 150 before, but went up to 190 yesterday and today I'm shooting for 230 by nightfall. Didn't drink yesterday and so far not wanting to drink today. SE's so far today (just took another 70mgs an hour ago) include a bit of a woozy lightheaded feeling and definate twitching. No nausea, although I have felt nauseau early on when I started....

I am female, 5'3" and about 145 pounds. Look forward to hearing from you!

[hangingoninFL]

Well I did it...

Sorry guys, I was offline until recently. They are widening my road and the construction crew keeps cutting my cable/internet line! It was killing me cause I knew I would have some feedback to my post.

I did back it down to 25 per hour today, and Ig, you're right, I may need to call off another day or two (but two weeks would raise way too many questions!). Side effects were pretty much the same as yesterday, which is what several of you had indicated would occur even though I had decreased my dosage. But the big news is, as of today, still no alcohol, but the thought has crossed my mind a time or two this evening

Also, I am 6 feet, 225 pounds, I will leave you non-US people to translate that into kg (if I remember my high school science its 2.2 pounds per kg?)

I will update you on my journey..

[moglor]

Well I did it...

Great news! I still have occasional thoughts about alcohol, more a habit of thought than an actual craving, and it goes out of my mind just as fast.

225lbs is 102kg. At 360mg, you're at 3.5mg/kg (yow!). I'm guessing you backed down to around 275mg, which would put you at 2.7mg/kg, which is right where Ameisen predicted results. I'm having good success at 225mg after an initial push up to 300, similar to what you did.

Keep at it!

[ignominous]

Well I did it...

I've also been cut of the net recently, just got back and great to be greeted with such positive news.

[hangingoninFL]

Well I did it...

Update

I did succumb last night, or maybe it was more of a test, or force of habit, I don't know, but I made myself one dirty martini last night (lately my poison of choice). I had to force myself to finish it (of course I had to finish it because I hate to waste anything) and did not want another.

So, if that's as good as it gets for me, then I'm good with that! But I am titrating down slowly so I hope I maintain my switch. After reading a couple posts from people that have had to titrate down quickly I actually went online and did some research on abrupt baclofen withdrawal, that is some scary shit! It sounds like it is even worse than abrupt alcohol withdrawal.

P.S. My insomnia is now pretty much non-stop. Even though I am lucky to get 3 hours of sleep a night I don't get sleepy during the day at all like I did when I was taking 4 doses per day. It must have something to do with the hourly dosing and keeping the level constant in your body. In spite of my lack of tiredness I can't believe ongoing lack of sleep would be healthy long-term. Hopefuly as I titrate down the insomnia will let up or else I will need to seek out something stronger than Benadryl and Valerian (which seem to no logner have any effect on me).

Later!

[moglor]

Well I did it...

I hope it works out for you, Hangin, we're all pulling for you.

I tried to "test" myself once too, and it led to a 6 week long spiral of depression and drinking. Sunny preaches this a lot, and I've come to join the bandwagon as well. If you've identified that alcohol is a problem, why put yourself back in harm's way? This seems like a common theme, though, so maybe it's a necessary step.

For me, the strange sleep patterns subsided after I'd been on a constant dose of bac for about 3 weeks. Incidentally, this is when I became most complacent, when the love affair with bac and newfound sobriety was over, and I decided to "test the envelope" to see how my cravings felt on a lower dose. If I ever choose to do such a thing again, it will only be after I've had at least a year to allow my brain to rewire itself. 18+ years of alcoholism is a long, long road to recover from.

-Moglor

[Sunnyvalenting]

Well I did it...

There is never any need to test the results. The strongest reason for relapse is reexposure to the addictive substance. No need to see if that can happen again. We all already know we have the vulnerability under certain circumstanses to be addicted to alcohol.
Sunny

[Topsy-Turvy-Tracy]

Well I did it...

Sunny, I wonder if that's not part of the whole addictive makeup - when you hear that you absolutely, positively must not do something, then of course you must try to do that thing. "Don't swallow chewing gum; don't play with fire; don't swim in the irrigation ditch," etc. Maybe that is more proof of my tentative theory that people with substance abuse problems never quite grew up.

One psychiatrist I saw said that kids spin around in circles because they like experiencing altered mental states - and some kids like it much more than other kids. I remember when I was a kid we used to do this thing where one kid would hold his/her breath and the other would grab them around the chest, to the point of lifting the kid of the ground, until the kid passed out. I loved that game! I loved coming out of the unconscious state, the buzzing, the confusion, all that. The psychiatrist asked me what I was going to do get that altered consciousness. I never came up with a satisfactory answer.

So, what do people do to get that?