Progress thread for ne

[Murphyx]

Progress thread for ne

Ne/Neva Eva;1157965 wrote:
Much love and with a debt of gratitude that I cannot repay to all of you on MWO,

Right bac at ya!:l

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

Thanks for the well wishes and congratulations, friends.

Not drinking is not so much a decision about drinking as it is about lifestyle. I don't want to drink! It gets in the way.
But it's also a nod to who I was, or wasn't.

My new therapist is actually an old therapist. She used to work for the state in the outpatient program that I was enrolled in following my 30 day "treatment" program. She remembers me from the group therapy sessions she ran 5 years ago! (I luuuved her.)

The thing is, she remembers me from then. Which makes me remember me. That was one of the times that my life came to a crashing, burning halt. Lost my house and my husband and my future and all hope and begged and cajoled my way into a state-funded treatment center. I was fucked up enough that they even put me in extended stay for another 6 weeks! (That place was baaaaad though so I left.)

And you know what the resounding emotions were about that period of time when I caught her up on all of the things that had happened since then? Shame and humiliation. That's about it, too. I got a 30 day reprieve from the beast. Learned that a schedule for things like eating, sleeping and walking were important. Those are tools I use today, so I don't begrudge the whole experience. But most of all, I was actively shamed and humiliated because of a disease I couldn't control.

You know what I'm like now? HA! Strong, not cowed. Hopeful. And much more. So screw that, and screw the booze, and bring on the decision making!

But I've got a caveat. Baclofen allows us to decide for ourselves. And it takes time. When indifference happens it's not an issue to continue to drink, in some ways. We don't think or feel about alcohol the way we used to, at least for a while. And the habit has to go. Thank goodness it's not day 1 every time, you know? We can just evaluate and move on.

I'm very grateful for, and appreciate the thoughts, about my decision. It makes it a lot easier for me when I'm coveting an ice-cold margarita. Plus I made it through an entire hormone cycle effortlessly on significantly less bac than I was taking. I think I got this. (In no small part because of your words, DG and Tip and R2R...And so many others.)
xo

[bleep]

Progress thread for ne

Ne/Neva Eva;1158464 wrote: Learned that a schedule for things like eating, sleeping and walking were important.

I still don't have a schedule for these sort of things, and probably never will, but it's really weird how much a part of normal life they are. Going to bed at a normal time, waking up with a bit of enthusiasm for the day - these things are normal, and great, and it's strange how small a role they used to play in my life.

They were never a part of my life before, and it's profound how much they are a part of it now. The strange gifts that sobriety brings...

Thankfully walking still plays no part in my life, other than to get to my car.

[RudyB]

Progress thread for ne

btw, one of my closest girlfriends who could give birth any day but is due in mid september told me today that she drinks cider vinegar in her water constantly.

[RudyB]

Progress thread for ne

ne, i guess my last post was in reference to a post on my own home thread which i made in your honor. something about the latest thing i am drinking.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

RudyB;1158931 wrote: ne, i guess my last post was in reference to a post on my own home thread which i made in your honor. something about the latest thing i am drinking.

So what is it?

[ik1966]

Progress thread for ne

:bump:

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

Morning, ik! Been meaning to check on you! Bacinabit and I will!
All well here.
xxoo

[missyabby1]

Progress thread for ne

Bacinabit? Scarey stuff.!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

Reggie;1159221 wrote:

Take care :l
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yditHU77U6E[/video]]‪Little Dragon "Ritual Union"‬‏ - YouTube

Makes me wanna dance.
Bacatcha. :l

[SlipperyPete]

Progress thread for ne

Congrats.

Want me to post a youtube link of a gangster rap song to celebrate?

[SlipperyPete]

Progress thread for ne

I'm doing it anyways!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWfbGGZE07M[/video]]‪Ice Cube - It Was A Good Day (HD)‬‏ - YouTube

Today was/is a good day!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

SlipperyPete;1159654 wrote: I'm doing it anyways!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWfbGGZE07M[/video]]‪Ice Cube - It Was A Good Day (HD)‬‏ - YouTube

Today was/is a good day!

Hell to the yeah. :H

Slipperishness, I'm not exactly the (stereo)typical rap listener, but I LOVE it. What I can't stand is the whole ho thing. and the shooting thing. I CAN relate and LOVE the angry stick-it- to-the-man-thing. I would consider it a personal favor if you could direct me...
Think Public Enemy and Gil Scot-Heron. But from this century!

And yes, it's a good day. But how do you know? It all starts to run together when you don't sleep, Pete. Guard Your Sleep, brother. You'll thank me...

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

Ha, no competition there Reg. You had me at the first...disappearing post. I was surprised to find this one still here!

And THAT song, that particular song, even the video, is a visit from the Spirit of the Universe just for me. (forgive for the meta-stuff, it's where I am atm. :H)

It's my theme for the day, maybe the week. :l

[SlipperyPete]

Progress thread for ne

The game is on, chap!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eplbDbp6XJQ[/video]]‪Anchorman-Afternoon Delight‬‏ - YouTube