Progress thread for ne

[bottlestopper]

Progress thread for ne

Ne - that is awful, that you have to go through all of that. It is unheard of here in Europe. Fantastic how upbeat and prepared you are. I will be thinking of you my friend, I hope you are OK, not had chance to catch up this week, we have both been busy. Hope you are bac soon.

[Doggygirl]

Progress thread for ne

Ne, I hope you and all people who might be in the path stay safe! Sounds like you are prepared. Reading your story about drunken disasters gave me the creepies. It made me think of the many "hurricane parties" I staggered my way through in Florida. That goodness none of them ever actually hit land as full hurricanes when I was there because I would have been in no shape to cope with it.

You and Mr. Doggy would get alone great as the King and Queen of Disaster Preparedness. He has C-Rations in the basement and can start fires without matches or lighters, and other "critical" stuff. :H

Be safe...

DG

[gratitude]

Progress thread for ne

ne,
thinking of you and wishing you the best. unbelievable how things have changed for you in such a short time. now you get to be the one helping others into the boat.
hey, if you don't mind me asking... what dose are you at these days. how about Ed?
Bon chance! and post some pics. stay safe. grat.:l

[RudyB]

Progress thread for ne

golly, i will probably not even be able to check in to see when you've checked back in 'cause i'm up for the next leg of hurricaine irene's jaunt up the east coast. wish i were as upbeat as you. but, like you, durr, i'm hoping that it'll be quick and things back to normal in a day. and thank goodness we're not drunk, huh? (i felt so thrilled to buy a quart of milk tonight at what i used to call the 'beer store'.) if we need rescuing we'll have clean underwear and clear eyes, won't we?

aww, ne. bet you're playing cards by candlelight right now. or sleeping.
besitos.
ruby

[redhead77]

Progress thread for ne

I hope you, Ed, and Goose remain safe. Please update us when you're able Ne. :l

[beatle]

Progress thread for ne

Ne/Neva Eva;1169175 wrote: Happily, I've moved on and am now just in the process of piling furniture as high up as possible. I'll take pix of the upholstered and wooden teeter-totters I'm creating if it looks as though you might get a giggle from it.

Yes please!

(I hope it's ok if I get more than a giggle from it... I was thinking more along the lines of guffawing...?... depends on the images, of course.)

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

We are safe and all well. Bacinawhile. Xo

[Doggygirl]

Progress thread for ne

I am so glad to see your post!

DG

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

gratitude;1169413 wrote: ne,
thinking of you and wishing you the best. unbelievable how things have changed for you in such a short time. now you get to be the one helping others into the boat.
hey, if you don't mind me asking... what dose are you at these days. how about Ed?
Bon chance! and post some pics. stay safe. grat.:l

Thanks all for the thoughts. No piccies atm. They were not very impressive after all, I decided. And nothing like the Nor'easter a couple of years ago when there were canoes in the streets and huge trees sitting on houses. Ugh. That was terrible.

I'm at 160mg. Was at 200mg for a long while, went up and down looking for a better place because I started to have SEs again. (somnolence, out of sorts, maybe depressed or something? Definitely blah.) 180mg was terrible, both going up and coming down and going up again. Weird, huh? So 160 it is for another couple of months, unless I start to feel wonky again.
I had a half a drink on Friday night. It was lovely and delish. It didn't feel threatening at all and I haven't had one since, nor do I want one. Nor was I craving. I was rather pissed off at Ed, but mostly I was in an outdoor patio at a restaurant at the beach with my trusty dog by my side and they make really good margaritas. So I had one. Sort of. Half was enough, which made me laugh when I realized it, because I certainly wasn't rationing. LOL. Such a joy, honestly, to not stress about it. (Not making light of the disease, okay? Just being joyful about things.)

Ed is still at 240mg. No SEs. Still or ever. wth that is about I don't know. He has a beer about once a week, which makes me a bit nervous, but he's fine with it. No harm, no fowl, (sic) I suppose. Drunk once since indifference. That was annoying. I was looking forward to spending the evening together and he looked...drunk. And had to concentrate. It was kinda disgusting. Thankfully he agreed and said it was rather a letdown.

His anxiety, or lack of it, is also astounding. (to me!)

Not to say that it's all sunshine and roses. I pledged to divorce him at least 6 times over the hurricane weekend. There is a reason that I love my dog more than my husband. She communicates better. FTR, he knows this and I dare say he feels the same way about his dog. She, of course, is the same dog.

Things are good.

[SlipperyPete]

Progress thread for ne

Good to hear you made it through the hurricane, NE. I found footage of you (I'm assuming) from the last hurricane.

Drunk Girl Talks Hurricane Irene Preparation On CBS Baltimore News Affiliate (VIDEO)

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

That's my old stomping ground, Pete. I'm from Baltimore.

Here's a video my neighbor took. The building across the street from where he's standing, the 3 story stone with the columns on the porches? That's mine. We're on the first floor, which you can't see because it's under water and trees.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJKlg9nhmnk&feature=related[/video]]Hurricane Irene Flooding Olde Towne Portsmouth Va - YouTube

(By the way, my neighbor told me about this video after I rammed his brand new truck trying to fit into a parking spot. Nice guy. He asked for $20 so he could get a guy to reattach his bumper. Glad I was sober! :H)

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Progress thread for ne

I think it's time to revive this old saw, despite all the reasons not to do so.

If there is one thing that is clear from our collective experiences, both here and in our efforts to find health and sobriety from other recovery it is this: Finding health and recovery is a mind game. I am not for a moment suggesting that the SEs are psychosomatic or that we manufacture our experiences. What I'm suggesting is that we can manufacture the outcomes. Right?

Attempting to lose weight, taking a cleanse, spending hours and hours at the gym, all of those things, in the thick of bac titration, are great ways to undermine the goal. Trying to excel in areas where we were previously unable is ridiculous. Those things, however, are all much more possible if one is not drinking against one's will.

If anxiety (and I believe that's a misnomer, since so many of us don't know we have it) is at the root of this for many of us, then managing that is the single most important predictor of success. It is also the thing that bac treats most effectively, and at relatively low doses. (Like 5mg!) I wish I had known to look for that easing. I wish I had known that managing that was the single most effective way to get to indifference in the fastest way possible.

I think that is the key to all of this! Those of us who don't or can't manage our anxiety, who don't know to look for it and how to deal with it, have to take much more bac, for much longer, than the ones who find that relief immediately.

And HDB, just simply because it's so disconcerting, contributes to anxiety. Going up, up, up without addressing that is the single easiest way to have to give up.

It's worth it. It works. Miraculously well. If you can just keep taking the damn pills.
just sayin

Hope it's a good day/afternoon/eve.

[beatle]

Progress thread for ne

I've been trying to stay away from this tarbaby of a forum (not that I want to, but that I have to, in order to survive. In a sense, it's self preservation) but I do read a lot, and contribute only when I think it's necessary -- if I really don't understand something that is important to me, or when I am convinced that I have something important to offer, and not offering it would be a disservice.

I think I know what you are saying, Ne, and perhaps you are targeting it at me, or at least a dialog we had recently brought up this very important point and instigated you to bring it up again. Perhaps not. It is irrelevant.

What is relevant to me is that I don't quite understand it (and perhaps others don't either?) because you don't give any concrete examples for handling the anxiety. You just say it must be managed-- and that is by not taking too much on at once (and not titrating too quickly).

In other words, it says managing anxiety is the key to bac working (or not working -- if you don't manage to manage anxiety). Am I barking up the wrong tree? (I love that image!)

Now, granted that I read through it quickly as I have a 10:00 appt and have to leave the house in 20 minutes (still haven't showered)... but should I have gleaned more from this post than that? Only that trying to do too much contributes to anxiety and going up too fast contributes to anxiety?

(Maybe I should have spent more time rereading Ne's and this post?).

So does this mean if people go up slower and ignore other aspects of their life while they do that, everything will work fine, because the anxiety will be manageable? What if the anxiety continues? Do you offer solutions of how to manage it? More importantly, what if a person is unable to drop everything to focus on the baclofen... won't that increase the anxiety?

In my instance, I became much less focussed on my work (I am self-employed), to focus on the baclofen, which made it difficult to focus anyway, and this increased my anxiety significantly. How would I pay the bills? (which I couldn't concentrate on paying anyway?) I was already in terrible debt! Could I keep custody of my children if I couldn't prove I could make a living? These are very real anxieties that were terribly exacerbated by taking baclofen, even when I titrated up very slowly. (And then I was urged to titrate up very quickly, as the slow route was in fact contributing to my anxiety)

And what about people who decrease their anxiety by exercising? Or perhaps their weight is vexing them so much that they feel more anxiety by stopping a diet than continuing it?

It seems to me we need to focus more on managing the anxiety in other ways than drinking and taking xanax (my methods of dealing with short-term, debilitating anxiety because it works... in the moment, which is what I desperately need... and it doesn't help to realize that it will increase anxiety in the long term, because I am desperate in the moment and HAVE to function right then).

Meditation increases my anxiety. Perhaps it will decrease it if I pursue it long enough, but then we are back to the other attempts getting in the way of bac working.

Although I undersatnd the overall purpose of this post (I think), I don't understand how it applies to everyday life. At least mine. Most of my anxiety is now related to all I have left undone while taking baclofen (for the past 2 years!). Leaving that alone increases my anxiety exponentially. What a conundrum!

I wonder if more concrete suggestions and explanations would help? Perhaps not so much for me, as we have hashed through this many times before individually), but maybe for others?

Or maybe I'm just missing the obvious point. If so, I apologize.

Now I will have to skip my shower, which is contributing tremendously to my anxiety.. but then again, if I had let this go, it would also vex me and make me anxious. (Time for a xanax and a drink::H)

[beatle]

Progress thread for ne

p.s. I cancelled my appointment (just a haircut) and rescheduled it for Thursday... and I will be sure to not look at MWO before I go)

[Murphyx]

Progress thread for ne

What the hell's a tarbaby? And what's a Pollyanna? Why do you people keep making words up?