Progress thread for ne

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I'm very confused by your posts, Spirit.

Did you relapse while you were taking baclofen?
Have you stopped taking baclofen?

It would be exceedingly helpful and insightful, especially for newcomers, if you posted your experiences. Doesn't that make sense to you? Isn't that the reason we are all here? To share our experience, strength and hope based on our own journeys?

[spiritwolf333]

I'm very confused by your posts, Spirit.

Did you relapse while you were taking baclofen?
Have you stopped taking baclofen?

It would be exceedingly helpful and insightful, especially for newcomers, if you posted your experiences. Doesn't that make sense to you? Isn't that the reason we are all here? To share our experience, strength and hope based on our own journeys?

Hi Ne -I apologize for your confusion. My experience, as I have posted many times, is relatively quite simple: Not one single individual medication works for me and some medications work better than others. With a smaller dose of baclofen and a larger dose of gabapentin, I still find myself not desiring to drink alcohol -physically or mentally.

Ne -I consider it very important that AUD persons have access to as much medical information and research as is possible. Perhaps others, at least on this forum, do not consider this topic important and prefer to stay with the promotion of only Baclofen, but I remember how vitally important it was for me in the beginning to find out as much information as I could regarding any and all medications for alcoholism.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hiya, Spirit. I guess I never really understood that one single medication didn't work for you to quit drinking. I thought you had posted that baclofen, alone, is what did that. I know you were taking other medications before you started taking baclofen, though.

Whatever the case, I'm glad that gabapentin, added to your regimen, has improved your situation. And I'm sorry that you were struggling.

Of course people, with any kind of illness, need as much information as they can get about how to treat their disease. It's one of the reasons I'm still here, posting regularly. I had tried SO many meds, and therapy, and AA, and rehab over about 20 years. Baclofen was a part of that effort, but it wasn't isolated. Like you, I decided to employ as much as I could in order to have a successful outcome. But (like you?) the only thing that actually treated my addiction to alcohol was baclofen. The rest of what I needed to do (and take) was peripheral to that medication. I couldn't have stopped drinking without baclofen, and I couldn't address everything else in my life, good or bad, until I was able to stop drinking against my will.

Cheers, Spirit. Stay well. And thanks for sharing a part of your story.

[bkyogagurl]

Ne-

Your posts especially on Lost's threads have really been resonating with me.. I am going to print one of them out and put it in my journal, the one with your <ping> in it. I think I have read it 10 times.
I have been reading here so much every day... I am going thru a spot where I don't feel I have very much valuable into to contribute.
I think it's ok..

But I wanted to say that I'm sorry for running away from my own thread when we exchanged words. I think it could have been a great thing for me to work thru an uncomfortable situation but I ran. That's what I do in my in person relationships as well.

I just wanted to basically say I really appreciate your posts.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I know that exchange was really hard for you and I regret my part in it. I was way too heavy handed! I apologized then, but I still feel badly. I'm glad you came back. This can be a really good place to work through stuff. It helped me in many ways. I hope it does for you, too.

And thanks. :hug:

[bkyogagurl]

Please don't feel bad... Your awesome and your posts are inspiring.

I would like to be able digest comments better and be authentic in my responses as well.

I am thinking of starting another thread for myself as it was really therapeutic for me to wire out my stuff and seemed to help me stay on track with AF days..

Are you still taking bac?

[Ne/Neva Eva]

A thread is a great idea, but it's really tough, too. Make no mistake, I still get self-conscious when I post. About every post. I just don't obsess about it the way I used to. I could definitely use a little more care about posting, the way I used to, but I've gotten complacent. Anyway, a thread is good, and hard, but good. I find that, particularly initially, sharing the experiences we go through is a great way to get real. And hopefully to find solutions. Down here in the meds threads it tends toward individual threads, but it doesn't have to be that way. (I guess? I sort of envy the camaraderie they have in some of the threads in General Discussion, it's just never worked here to have a daily thread. Maybe someday...)

Baclofen is likely a lifetime medication for me, because it's a lifeline medication for me. I'm taking 200 mg of it daily.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I read a study, or studies, that showed that there was a significant difference in the way HDB worked in the brain. (As opposed to <80 mg/day.) Something about dopamine...but not just dopamine.

Anyone remember that study and can direct me where to find it?

[spiritwolf333]

Hiya, Spirit. I guess I never really understood that one single medication didn't work for you to quit drinking. I thought you had posted that baclofen, alone, is what did that. I know you were taking other medications before you started taking baclofen, though.

Whatever the case, I'm glad that gabapentin, added to your regimen, has improved your situation. And I'm sorry that you were struggling. (Ne, I have never said that I was struggling -but thank you for your thought)

Of course people, with any kind of illness, need as much information as they can get about how to treat their disease. It's one of the reasons I'm still here, posting regularly. I had tried SO many meds, and therapy, and AA, and rehab over about 20 years. Baclofen was a part of that effort, but it wasn't isolated. Like you, I decided to employ as much as I could in order to have a successful outcome. But (like you?) the only thing that actually treated my addiction to alcohol was baclofen. The rest of what I needed to do (and take) was peripheral to that medication. I couldn't have stopped drinking without baclofen, and I couldn't address everything else in my life, good or bad, until I was able to stop drinking against my will.

Hi Ne -thanks for the response. In your post where you said that if you had a 'do over', you would have started with Gabapentin. So that all us my learn, can you please tell us why this might be the case?

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hi Ne -thanks for the response. In your post where you said that if you had a 'do over', you would have started with Gabapentin. So that all us my learn, can you please tell us why this might be the case?

Honestly, I don't know. There was a time when Murphy was really into it, and it was kind of a thing around here. Maybe it was then that I said it? I'll need some context in order to give you a definitive answer (or at least a guess!).

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Someone mentioned the *ping* thing on another thread, and let me tell you. This week has been full of them. Two primary ones, though. One is that my anxiety disorder (or whatever the hell we want to label it, that isn't accurate but close enough) is not very well managed when I'm under a lot of stress.

The other had to do with a consistent barrage of reminders that I only need to own what I create. I get to decide what I create. I keep fecking forgetting that.

On the other hand, I'm still carrying all of this guilt and turmoil around. It was a tough week...to watch my parents crash and burn in the face of this insurmountable task.

I don't believe in tough love. Mostly because it doesn't work. But also because it's an oxymoron. It seems to me that punishing someone because you love them is simply the opposite of what love really is. It's not my experience, either. The only thing my parents wouldn't do for me is jeopardize their own relationship with each other. How cool is that? I didn't get it back then, but now it makes perfect sense. They made me together and together they remain, independent from me. It's a good lesson about love and commitment, I think. Anyway, that's not where I want this to go.

I know I shouldn't feel guilty about the fact that this has been horrific and mostly because they didn't manage it correctly. I don't really feel guilty about that part of it. What I feel guilty about is that I KNEW what they were in for, and haven't gotten to a place where I can communicate well enough that they could hear me when I told them. I made so many damn mistakes! If I'd been doing the work I need to do to be...me...then I could have really helped them much more.

I feel that way a lot. On here, and in my 3D life. Don't get me wrong, I know I can't "save" people. That's bull shit and that's not what I'm talking about. And gods know, I'm not looking for affirmation. I just felt the lack of my own...ability to support. You know who is okay at that? My husband. I have a lot to learn from him.

That's all I've got. These aren't other-people-pings that are applicable to things going on elsewhere. I just wanted to get it all down. For me. And future me.

Paying it forward to myself. There's a ping worth remembering.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Anyone wanna give me a quick how to so I can find individual posts without reading entire threads?

Thanks.

[StuckInCA]

Anyone wanna give me a quick how to so I can find individual posts without reading entire threads?

Thanks.

Google. That's the easiest way to find them.

[terryk]

Anyone wanna give me a quick how to so I can find individual posts without reading entire threads?

Thanks.

Go to the main "Forum: Medication Research and Support" page, and use the "Advanced Search" under the "Search Forum" drop down menu, which is on the top right, next to the "Forum Tools" drop down menu and over the "Last Post By" Column. That "Advanced Search"has the option to display results as posts, not the "Advanced Search" link that's on the top right of that front page.

-tk

[Otter]

I wasn't drinking heavily and never got into any trouble drinking so I never classified myself as an alcoholic. I decided to stop drinking. I did so by sitting with a pint of beer at each sitting and just nursing it over a couple of hours. Then I reduced it to half a pint. It took a couple of years but eventually I got to a point where I didn't drink at all.

On the basis of the thinking which is emerging on this forum, that constitutes a "cure" for alcoholism. There are a lot of ways to stop drinking for people who are able. Some people stop easily, some take time, some need a bit of a help from a drug which tweeks part of their brain, some turn to cannabis.

Great!

But that doesn't say anything about what is behind alcoholism as an overpowering, life destroying illness for those who are unable to withstand it. It just shows that some people aren't actually addicted to it and don't have the illness in its full blown state.

I think it is particularly dishonest to come here and try to equate your own experience to that of someone who is bed-ridden and facing death from this illness when you are able to post here, use a computer, the internet, hold down a job or run a business, meet with clients, drive a car, go to Europe to meet with potential business clients, engage lawyers you meet on forums like this to help you with international patent applications, say that you are looking for a European agent for your business, that sort of thing.

That is not the experience of someone who is unable even to get out of bed for weeks on end and doesn't have a life worth living.

I am finding a lot of the comments and dialogue on this forum becoming very depressing reading because the forum has gone from one where people were coming here in states of total collapse, posting drunk and sharing the horrors of what they were going through. And the only drug that was helping with these posters was baclofen. Most of them left and a lot of them left because of this attitude of a lot of people here that because their condition wasn't as serious, they felt the side effects of a drug which works on a serious case meant that the drug was not a valid "cure".

Confusing side effects with "ineffectiveness" and portraying a life saving treatment for people staring death in the face as ineffective is pretty reprehensible when you are well enough to engage in the kind of activities I have described above. Trying to divert attention away from a truly miraculous medical discovery to less effective drugs and trying to persuade people to spend time engaging in "research" about these kinds of drugs and approaches when people are dying from this illness is even worse. Doing all this because you, personally, are inconvenienced by the side effects is down right pathological. It shows, to me, someone who is only concerned about themselves.

We had a lot of posters here a few years ago who were in the same category only, instead of pushing less effective drugs, they were pushing AA treatment because it worked for them. They weren't concerned with the science or the lives of people who really did need an effective treatment. As baclofen took off and more and more people realized it worked, these nay sayers disappeared into the woodwork.

The trouble with this forum is that a lot of people who have had serious problems and found relief from baclofen have just left here because of the attitude of the remaining core group of people who remain here posting all the time. Sure, there are a lot who use this as a forum for sharing their experiences, which is what it is for, but generally, it has gone back to being what it was before Ameisen came on the scene, a forum where people talk about the "many" new drugs out there that kind of work for some people who probably could and would have stopped drinking without drugs.

Some people here need to step back and think about who it is they are trying to help here on this forum. I came here to get help for someone else, who really needed medical help and people like Lo0p helped me get that help. Some people here have come here for help for themselves and if it doesn't suit them because of their high pressure jobs and lives to have side effects then, hey, why would they care about people who are dying from the disease.

And, Ne, I do respect you for your commitment to helping people but I see you slipping into agreeing with certain people on here that weak drugs for less serious conditions are "ok" because "anything that works is good". Take it from me, some people here are not telling all about themselves because they are so high powered in their own lives and have so much going for them that their only concern is to get a medication which allows them to take their businesses to new heights and become very wealthy so baclofen doesn't suit them. I am upset because I got sucked into helping one of these people and in the end he had me thinking I might have had a career again but then he just went silent and then told me I was wrong about everything I was doing here and elsewhere and I had it all wrong when it came to baclofen and so did Ameisen. I had an exchange of over 100 personal emails with this man, giving him advice on business matters over several months and in the end I felt completely worthless as a person, forget about how he made me feel about what I was trying to do for others with baclofen.