Progress thread for ne

[YouKayBee]

I'm sorry you are here (meaning where you are right now), it sounds hellish.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

omg. I'm such a heel.

I was so full of self-loathing and recrimination that I didn't even check back here. Or maybe I did, drunk, and then couldn't post? I vaguely remember that.

Thank you all so much. You are amazing. And you know what? I will absolutely, positively write about my life here tomorrow. It was really great to read what I wrote 2 months ago. Things have definitely improved, but are still challenging. So, more tomorrow.

xxoo

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Alright, so it's a couple of days later, but whatever.

I'm still struggling with depression. Or anxiety. I'm pretty sure it's just the anxiety now, actually. I'm on a cocktail of medications: Pristiq, Wellbutrin, a very small dose of Abilify, and the very occasional xanax. And of course, baclofen.

If I had been anything close to consistent with my baclofen dose, I wouldn't still be drinking. It seems that no matter how many ways I take to remind myself, I still often come up short at the end of the day. I should be at 325mg, consistently, but it's more like 200+ on some days...Very annoying since if there's anything I preach it's that baclofen dosing needs to be consistent or it'll mess a body up.

The good news is that with the depression at bay, I'm actually bathing and leaving my house! Woohoo that I'm taking a daily shower!! The bad news is that I'm still not well enough to really participate in life in a real way.

I really appreciate the thoughts you shared, Grat. I know I don't really ask for advice, because I don't really need it. (I feel like I KNOW what I SHOULD be doing, I just can't or won't do it. <heavy, heavy sigh>) But it's really good to have reminders and reinforcements. I think, maybe, perhaps, I'm ready to bust my behind at the gym again. That was really fun, and the more I think about it, the more I think it's really the crux of this matter.

(Yes, I know, Cass. But you were always preaching to the choir about that exercise thing. It was the other stuff...Anyway. Hope you're well.)

Grat, I would love to try out those CDs you mentioned. I don't really use the email you have anymore, but I'll PM the account I check and hopefully you'll see it.

I actually have been meditating a bit, and like exercise, I love it. I'm bored with what I have, though, and would love (and need) to find something different. I don't want to buy a program, but if you can get those CDs, that would be great. If not, and anyone else has any recommendations, I would love to hear them.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I should clarify that by busting it at the gym, I mean actually going to the gym in the first place. Ha! Gotta start somewhere.

[terryk]

If I had been anything close to consistent with my baclofen dose, I wouldn't still be drinking. It seems that no matter how many ways I take to remind myself, I still often come up short at the end of the day. I should be at 325mg, consistently, but it's more like 200+ on some days...Very annoying since if there's anything I preach it's that baclofen dosing needs to be consistent or it'll mess a body up.

Here's how I never miss a dose:

http://www.amazon.com/Polished-Chorme-Aluminum-Compartment-Weight/dp/B00J8GATD0/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1440588315&sr=8-4&keywords=metal+pill+box+3+compartment

First dose goes into my mouth when I fill the case when I wake up, 2nd dose at lunch (1pm-ish), 3rd dose at dinner (7-ish), 4th dose at bedtime. After 5 years, I don't even need to set a reminder on my phone. Each compartment holds 6 (round) pills - 240mg at 10mg pills, 480 for 20mg, 600 for 25mg (not counting the first dose).

I actually have been meditating a bit, and like exercise, I love it. I'm bored with what I have, though, and would love (and need) to find something different. I don't want to buy a program, but if you can get those CDs, that would be great. If not, and anyone else has any recommendations, I would love to hear them.

Some old-school mantras on keeping it real, loyalty, killing procrastination, and living drug and alcohol free:

Start Today


Nice to see you back.

-tk

[Molly78]

I have a similar pill holder, terryk. Remembering to take it out of my bag at the right time during a very busy day, especially when I sometimes don't get a lunch break, is the problem. Reminders on phone just get switched off when I'm in the middle of something. What usually reminds me is the thought, about 4pm, that the end of the working day is coming up, wow! I could use a drink..........oh! Have I taken my bac???

A controlled release preparation that you can take just in the morning would be great. Now THAT'S something Big Pharma could work on. I don't understand why they aren't. It would get them round the fact that bac is a generic & make them megabucks, as well as promoting bac as an effective treatment for alcoholism. Instead they are messing about with arbaclofen, which as far as I know only lasts 4-6 hours like bac.

[bleep]

Hello Ne, long time! Sorry to hear that you are wading through shit. As usual I have no great advice, but I can recommend a great sci-fi series that I'm busy ploughing through - The Revelation Space Collection, by Alistair Reynolds. Should keep the wolves from the door for a few days.

I bet you are over thinking the whole thing anyway!

[StuckinLA]

Sweet mercy, Reggie, Bleep, TerryK. Oh and you too, Ne.

Miss you all so dearly.

[YouKayBee]

I have a similar pill holder, terryk. Remembering to take it out of my bag at the right time during a very busy day, especially when I sometimes don't get a lunch break, is the problem. Reminders on phone just get switched off when I'm in the middle of something. What usually reminds me is the thought, about 4pm, that the end of the working day is coming up, wow! I could use a drink..........oh! Have I taken my bac???

A controlled release preparation that you can take just in the morning would be great. Now THAT'S something Big Pharma could work on. I don't understand why they aren't. It would get them round the fact that bac is a generic & make them megabucks, as well as promoting bac as an effective treatment for alcoholism. Instead they are messing about with arbaclofen, which as far as I know only lasts 4-6 hours like bac.

You mean like they did reformulating Naltrexone, ended up with Nalmefene which has stronger side effects and costs 3 x the amount.

I thought it was a good idea, until it became reality.

[Molly78]

No, I mean reformulating baclofen like the ADHD drugs, methylphenidate & dexamphetamine, both of which now exist as a once daily dose - Concerta XL in the UK, Adderall XR (I think) in the US. Both those generic drugs wear off after 4-6 hours like baclofen. The extended release preparations contain the drug in a form which is released gradually over 8-12 hours, so you need only take it in the morning.

Nalmefene has no benefits over naltrexone, it was another blatant money making project by a drug firm, changing a formula slightly so that they can get a patent/license.

[neophyte]

I've read up on Nalmefene, from what I gather, I agree with Molly, it looks like it does something very similar to naltrexone. Just take the cheaper option.

[Spiritfree]

No, I mean reformulating baclofen like the ADHD drugs, methylphenidate & dexamphetamine, both of which now exist as a once daily dose - Concerta XL in the UK, Adderall XR (I think) in the US. Both those generic drugs wear off after 4-6 hours like baclofen. The extended release preparations contain the drug in a form which is released gradually over 8-12 hours, so you need only take it in the morning.

Nalmefene has no benefits over naltrexone, it was another blatant money making project by a drug firm, changing a formula slightly so that they can get a patent/license.

Hi Molly -Please see the following information regarding a study involving extended release Baclofen for alcoholism (AUD):

https://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT00802035?term=baclofen+er&rank=5

-sf-

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hiya fellas! So nice of you to pop in!

That wasn't exactly the type of meditative recording I normally listen to, Tk. Never the less, I added it to my playlist. If for no other reason than to think of you and The Goal when I'm in a listening mood. As we've discussed many times before, (many, many times) over the last several years, I have a pill holder. I just forget it. Or forget to take 'em. Two days last week, I was out of the house all day and didn't realize that I hadn't taken any baclofen until after 4pm! Then swallowing 300+ is difficult. Still, I did it. (I can't take it all in one, Fredson, it makes me very woozy and stoned. Unlike some of you peeps, I'm not fond of the feeling. )

Speaking of, bleep, thanks for chiming in. I bought the book, and started it, but now can't find my kindle. Thanks for the recommendation. Believe it or not I am barely thinking at all. ha. Seriously, though. Definitely not over-thinking these days. Maybe it's the meds? Maybe my mind's just tired...Whatever the reason, I'm not spinning my wheels in my normal fashion.

Reggie, "It's a phantom food, a fairy floss thought" is brilliant. Your whole post is brilliant. SO DAMN GLAD you didn't delete it, since I'm not getting updates via email. I wouldn't have seen it! Thank you.

Stuck, I agree. Nice to see familiar faces.

As to an extended release formula: I would pay big money for that! I wouldn't have been able or willing to do it when I started out with baclofen, but holy moly, it would make a huge difference in my life if there was an extended release baclofen.

By the way, my new pdoc is actually prescribing baclofen for both Ed and I! She didn't even hesitate. Mind you, I was seeing her regularly for about 6 weeks (I see her for therapy as well as for meds) before I brought up baclofen. I think it makes a difference when there is a relationship established. Whatever her reasons, it's a huge relief and a HUGE difference in cost. ($10 copay vs. $250+/month for online meds.)

The difference in the way I feel now compared with even a month ago is pretty amazing. I'm not sleeping (or drowsy and out of sorts) all day. Getting much more done. Ed and I, and my parents, are tearing down and rebuilding our porch/patio. It's a pain in the foot, but has made a big difference in our outdoor space. I spend most of my time out here, because cigarettes. It's motivated me to redo my study, which is why I can't find anything. Including my power cord for my laptop and I'm running out of juice...

So peace out. Thanks everyone, for checking in. Makes me feel loved.

[Molly78]

Thanks for the link, sf. The study was last verified in 2011 though, so presumably didn't produce any results which would make the drug profitable for the company running the trial. Maybe total dosage too low?

Fred - taking 150mg of immediate release (ie normal) bac would, I imagine produce some unpleasant SE about an hour later in most people, though the therapeutic effect might well last about 12 hours. What I had in mind was a slow release preparation which gives you a drip feed of bac throughout about 12 hours, maintaining stable blood levels throughout that time, thereby avoiding SE. Concerta XL works that way, so the technology is there, & sf's link shows that someone has thought of it. In 2011 it may not have been clear how high you need to go dosage wise, lots of the earlier trials with normal bac only went to 30mg a day which would be ineffective for most of us.

[Molly78]

Fred, I just re read your post - did you really have worse SE taking bac at intervals than all at once? That really surprises me. Bac is mainly passed out unchanged in the urine, so I wonder if maybe you have super-effective kidneys which excreted most of your big dose almost immediately! For best therapeutic effect you do really need stable blood levels.