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    Progress thread for ne

    Hi, Missy. I'm here. It's funny the dichotomy we all care in our minds, isn't it?

    Kind and generous is not one I'm actively participating in in my 3D life. I like to think that my participation here and via online communications counts toward something. But who knows? Well, I do actually. It does count and I'm actively doing my closest version of my best, which is often lacking. But I'm new to this whole sobriety thing and cutting myself some slack.

    'cause I also have other thoughts on the matter. Including, (but not limited to :H) the fact that it's very hard to suss this all out without much guidance, while we're dealing with our own paths. Especially online. Actually, I think there are plenty of guides, I just don't listen very well all the time.

    Anyhoo. Glad you came on to touch base. I'd love to hear more. I'm definitely not in a place where I want to discuss the merits of one or the other or why someone I care for is an ass. None of us are, and all of us are. That's enough to keep me safe here, and able to continue posting.
    xo

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      Progress thread for ne

      I'm about as likely to try getting drunk from AL filled chocolate as I am to... Well, whatever. You guys act like...um, alcoholics! What's up with that? :H
      and chocolate liqueur? I must have been drinking the wrong stuff, because the combination would've led me to a lot more resistance to indifference. I can't get enough chocolate. Now or ever.

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        Progress thread for ne

        Nah...........its just life, Ne, The just honesty of life. I still worry about your correspondence with the guru of bac. Whats his name? And worry about his inflence on your posts. That is a major worry for me. I think bac is going to be an absolute next treatment for us all..................but with honesty Ne.

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          Progress thread for ne

          strange but true: my sweet tooth is totally gone. i thought it would rush in w a vengence now that al is gone, but it hasn't. i have no taste for anything sweet but honey in my tea. none at all for chocolate. totally weird!

          missy, reading the posts here is like a barefoot walk on the beach. and then i come to yours and it's like a naked roll in broken glass. you once implied that your family rather likes you. why don't you go share your vitriol with them? we don't appreciate or enjoy it around here. it's truly very unpleasant.

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            Progress thread for ne

            missyabby1;1144901 wrote: Nah...........its just life, Ne, The just honesty of life. I still worry about your correspondence with the guru of bac. Whats his name? And worry about his inflence on your posts. That is a major worry for me. I think bac is going to be an absolute next treatment for us all..................but with honesty Ne.
            :H
            Despite the vivid metaphors, (well put, my word-loving-friend, if maybe erroneous for me.) I think I get it. Maybe. lol

            Nevertheless, I'm not playing when I don't understand the framework or the purpose. If you wanna be friends, I'm game. If you wanna be enemies, I'm busy. If you wanna argue, well, that might be fun, but I won't do it here, only in pm or email.

            Keep getting well, fellow MWOers! Busy at it over here, meself!
            xo

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              Progress thread for ne

              RudyB;1144908 wrote: strange but true: my sweet tooth is totally gone. i thought it would rush in w a vengence now that al is gone, but it hasn't. i have no taste for anything sweet but honey in my tea. none at all for chocolate. totally weird!
              Weird indeed. The absolutely same thing happened to me a couple of months back. I had such a sweet tooth, but now I have absolutely no interest in anything like that...not even cake YIKES!!!

              The unexamined life is not worth living

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                Progress thread for ne

                NE, your limitless patience and tact is impressive. Honestly. It's making me re-think how I'm responding to people.
                Knowledge of what is possible is the beginning of happiness.
                George Santayana

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                  Progress thread for ne

                  Murphyx;1144991 wrote: Weird indeed. The absolutely same thing happened to me a couple of months back. I had such a sweet tooth, but now I have absolutely no interest in anything like that...not even cake YIKES!!!
                  RudyB;1144908 wrote:
                  strange but true: my sweet tooth is totally gone. i thought it would rush in w a vengence now that al is gone, but it hasn't. i have no taste for anything sweet but honey in my tea. none at all for chocolate. totally weird!
                  WTF??? Perhaps I've picked up your sweet tooths (dunno, don't care) through some sort of weird Charlie-Brown kind of osmosis. Everything I eat is loaded with sugar, even when it's unintentional. The obsession with the many varieties of MnMs is waning a bit. But I buy them in HUGE containers now. No dainty little 7-11 version, with only 2.5 servings per bag. Oh no.
                  Gotta have the big box store xtra large party pack. It's embarrassing. Or would be if anyone cared.

                  HA! Pete! hahahaha! Thanks though. I like the way you respond to people. Stick around long enough, or read the right threads and you will see the dark side! muahahaha!

                  bacinabit! (stole that from the Army thread in general. I like them there! )

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                    Progress thread for ne

                    It's too damn quiet in here today. Where is everybody???

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                      Progress thread for ne

                      oh good, so you feel it too. i was wondering why nobody has responded to my horrendous plights as described on my thread. where's the sympathy, folks?! (oh, you're not there. you don't know about my travails yet. i'm sure you'll flood me with love and sorry for you's when you read about my suffering.)

                      bac to you, ne.

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                        Progress thread for ne

                        Reggie;1145357 wrote: Hello
                        I thought Id post this thought on Ne thread ( hope you dont mind) as its a safe place for me..Since I reached indifference I have studied the reasons why my addicted brain has finally calmed down ...however my dilemma...HABIT .doesn't fit the Dopamine re adjustment mold ..its the ole nature nurture thing..bloody habits ..Any one got some thoughts on this ?...Habitual behavior is fucking driving me crazy lately..even though i dont crave...go figure?
                        Yes, I have some thoughts on habits and a theory. But I'm not allowed to expound on theories any more 'cos they're mostly bullshit. Suffice it to say, habitual behaviour is doing my melon in. :upset:

                        The unexamined life is not worth living

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                          Progress thread for ne

                          Reggie;1145357 wrote: Since I reached indifference I have studied the reasons why my addicted brain has finally calmed down ...however my dilemma...HABIT .doesn't fit the Dopamine re adjustment mold ..its the ole nature nurture thing..bloody habits ..Any one got some thoughts on this ?...Habitual behavior is fucking driving me crazy lately..even though i dont crave...go figure?
                          Where on earth did you find that avatar, Reg? cause that's fantastic!
                          I don't really know what you mean, and I'd like to understand, 'cause, well, my life sort of depends on the outcome of all this. (not to be too dramatic!) :H

                          I was flipping through a glossy mag last night and got really ticked off at the Patron advert with recipes for yummy summer drinks for elegant people in posh surroundings. A "why can't I be that fabulous and chic and sip yummy summer drinks??? On a balcony overlooking the Manhattan skyline with all the other too-cool-to-be-you-people?" All that from a piccie of a yellow cocktail. :boohoo:

                          Murphyx;1145366 wrote:
                          But I'm not allowed to expound on theories any more 'cos they're mostly bullshit. Suffice it to say, habitual behaviour is doing my melon in. :upset:
                          Oh, sheddep will you? That's not what she said. Bring it on. Inquiring minds would like to know. Ed's averse to the whole idea but that doesn't last very long... Neither of us is working. I'm almost more concerned about boredom giving rise to bad habits than I am about money. aaargh.

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                            Progress thread for ne

                            Reggie;1145430 wrote: Ne you mentioned ..bad habits in your posts ...
                            huh. Maybe the one I deleted? Or just in general? Either way, I'll have to think on it, and get bac to it. The point is not lost on me, though. I think it's a really important discussion. (I let myself out of bed at 3:30am, went bac to sleep for about an hour around 8:30, and I'm STILL groggy. ugh.)

                            Murphy has some thoughts I haven't listened to in a while, :H, and he's given it a good deal more thought than I have. I'll be bac after some more coffee.

                            (an aside: One of the things that is absolutely missing from this whole bac/MWO experience in terms of recovery is aftercare, right? What to care about AFTER you no longer care about booze! :H And what to do if you start caring again??? and :upset

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                              Progress thread for ne

                              I know exactly what you mean Reg. Habits are a bitch. Only for me, it is somewhat more than a habit. A couple of glasses of watery wine in the evening, and I'm sorted. Seldom more, but definitely not less. Initially, it worries me greatly. Why was I doing this, if I was free? I went pretty deep into it without coming up with answers, and then one day it dawned on me that I didn't actually need it answered.

                              So that's where I currently stand. Happy with my lot. For the first time in a long, long time. I'm sorry it's not the most helpful of answers.

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                                Progress thread for ne

                                Ne/Neva Eva;1145423 wrote:

                                Oh, sheddep will you? That's not what she said.
                                Lol, she may not have done, but it doesn't matter 'cos I disprove my own theories on a regular basis, so I've decided they're worthless. Ahhh what can ya do eh?

                                The unexamined life is not worth living

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