My Bac Adventure

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

I got them from www.prescriptiondrugliquidators.com. What a deal! 10,000 mg for $12 with free shipping from Uzbekistan. Just started taking them today. I'll let you know how it goes.

[Bruunhilde]

My Bac Adventure

LOL, great marketing with the happy faces!

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

Ok, this is a little weird. I am now up to 150 mg and really have not experienced the decrease in cravings I did the last go around when I reached 150 mg.

The only difference is I reached this level in less than half the time. Maybe my receptors need a little more time to get saturated? Yo GABA GABA!

Or maybe these cool little Bac pills with the happy faces don't have the same efficacy?

Oh well, onward and upward...

[Ne/Neva Eva]

My Bac Adventure

Just be happy you don't have the ones with the little frowny faces.
Those suck.
As you well know.

Grommet;1213353 wrote: Yo GABA GABA!

Love it.

It'll happen.

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

Thanks Ne, I too know it will happen. No worries, stay the course, eyes on the prize.

I have been beating myself up a bit lately that I was so stupidly cocky that I went off Bac when things were going so well. Jan to Mar of last year were some of them best times of my life.

After 25 years in the belly of the best there is never a shortage of things I can beat myself up about. Having success on Bac then having to start over should not be another reason.

Still drinking way too much. But my attitude is good, and my confidence is high.

[taw]

My Bac Adventure

Nice to see you bac, Grommet...stop beating yourself up...it will lead you right back to the drink as it did for me last week!

Keep us posted on your progress! Keep up the good attitude too!

[RudyB]

My Bac Adventure

heya grommet! your attitude is great. maybe someone else has tried that brand of pills? they say it can make all the difference. (but didn't someone also say that the second time around it can take longer to switch? i dunno for sure.)

good luck, mister! stick around if you would...

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

FINALLY! Was AF last night for the first time in 5 months. Didn't really mean to be, just happened.

I guess the synapses are starting to saturate.

Yo GABA GABA!

[Bruunhilde]

My Bac Adventure

Congrats! Just in time for the holiday season. I'm happy for ya G. :goodjob:

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

Time to put another entry into the diary.

Just went up to 200 mg a couple of days ago. SEs are much less than the first go 'round. I sometimes think its because I now know what to expect, and I'm not obsessing over every little twitch.

Starting to feel some indifference, but still not anywhere near where I was at 200 mg last time. I told Mrs Grommet that she needs to break her ankle one more time so I can have the added motivation of the weight of the world on my shoulders again - my very own 12 step program :H.

I'm still getting myself depressed over where I was last time - how close to the switch and how good my life was. Its totally stupid isn't it? But that's just how the mind can drift when its saturated with poison I suppose. I guess I thought I'd be back to that great spot by now, and I'm not.

No worries - rest assured I will never lose the faith. Just KTTDP! Power through, head down, eyes on the prize. The great news is (see, I'm starting to learn to guide my mind to the positive) I'm totally comfortable now with going as high as I need to. Last time I was freaked out by the thought of going above 250. No reason why, just was. But not anymore.

This is the only place I feel like I can let things out. I have to keep the strong front in my regular life with two youngins', a great wife, a mortgage, 6 employees, a stupid dog, and a shelter cat I swore I would never like...

Thanks

[Bruunhilde]

My Bac Adventure

Hi Grommet!

So do you finally like the cat just a teensy bit?

I know what you mean about MWO being the only place you can spill your guts like this. Earlier this year I was getting so comfortable talking about the drink problem that I forgot to filter outside of MWO and shocked a friend by casually talking about drinking too much too often. Oy.

Keep up the pace, G, keep posting too, I miss your sane voice here. Don't despair, there's an app for that. That is, if it continues to be bad. Gabapentin. But in the meantime, you're right, once your brain is not saturated with poison, you won't have to fake the positive attitude and strong front. It's just underwater right now. I can relate!

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

Thank you Bruun.

I got a chuckle about being a "sane" voice :H, I aspire to being an "insane" voice but still don't have it in me yet..

The thing about your friend. Yup, know what you mean. I did something similar two nights ago.

And by the way, wasn't your first user name the name of your dog but you had to change it to remain anonymous? That was about a year ago, I guess I'm showing my age...

edit: that little rodent has won me over - shit! I hate everything about cats, but this little guy is different. He's more dog than cat. Or maybe its just me and I'm changing (?)

[Grommet]

My Bac Adventure

OK - didn't want to post this too soon, but I am AF tonight (Friday!). The main reason is I have to get up tomorrow am at 5:00 to get my little guy to a hockey game that's 2 hours away.

Brunn, you will appreciate this. My wife and I were born and raised in San Diego. The only place you could skate within a 100 mule radius at the time was at the Fashion Valley mall.

Even though we now live on the east coast, I was/am completely confused and dismayed when the liittle guy said he wanted to play hockey. Long story short, it is the only sport he plays and plays it year round. So now he's on a travel team and I still don't know how to skate (I can surf, but not like that does me any good in this frozen hell...)

[RudyB]

My Bac Adventure

grommet, you could start by sliding around in socks pulled over your boots -you know, to get the feeling of the ice under your feet. try to do it right after the zamboni has gone around, and it'll feel like gliding on silk! i'm sure your son would love to see you in such a state as he prepares for his game. (btw, be sure to get him a good mouthguard, otherwise the dental bills will suck!) soon enough, you two will be trading slap shots and you'll think nevermore about the bubbly fizz or warm buzz of booze. (hmm, would that it were that simple.)

i relate to letting go of needing to be on a low dose. i was in a hurry to go down, but then i realized that baclofen beats cravings any day; i'd rather stay high on it than sink low on the alternative.

sure wish i could end with a nice joke.

[Bruunhilde]

My Bac Adventure

heheheheh Grommet, I've always maintained that cats are very like dogs, and cat haters just REFUSE to try cats out and feel cats are weaker. I think its either because they don't like that cats aren't as eager to please, or that they're more a feminine than masculine type, thus lower on the value levels, because women are less valued than men being perceived as weaker. Whateva...