I am a trainwreck!

[redhead77]

I am a trainwreck!

You are not a lost cause Taw! The weekends when I'm off are the hardest for me too. I try to work the weekends lately, just to avoid it. This won't be a great answer for me long term, of course. Are there any other tools you could employ? Maybe nal on the weekends before you drink? I know you tried it, but I can't remember if it helped at all. Oh, it made you throw up, didn't it?

[taw]

I am a trainwreck!

Yes, Nal made me throw up...but at least I did not drink as much! Maybe I will have to try that again! I am just so disappointed! I had been doing so well and now this...I am sure a good nights sleep tonight will do wonders!

[RudyB]

I am a trainwreck!

it's very disappointing to fall off the happy horse of doing so well. but i think we've all done it more than once! this is a process, with ups and downs galore. focus on the ups. you will pull through.

[taw]

I am a trainwreck!

Thank you very much!!! Onward we go....

[RudyB]

I am a trainwreck!

onward and UPWARD!

[bleep]

I am a trainwreck!

Hey Taw,

Sorry to hear you are struggling. You're certainly not a lost cause though! Try not to think about it too much today - I always used to find my head was a very unforgiving place after a disaster. Not only do you feel bad, but your brain is spinning from all the chemicals in it being wobbled so much. You'll be in a better place tomorrow, in every sense of the word.

[Bruunhilde]

I am a trainwreck!

Taw, I agree with Red and Rudy here, you are NOT a lost cause. And with bleep, I'm fighting the same AfterBeastBrain - keep stopping myself from any and all bad thoughts. I worry about my dog, and start to freak because I'm fried, so I stop because I know I'm not reacting normally. Same with a dozen other things today. I am AF3 today, after almost a two week binge so you're doing better than me! I can only mod sometimes, and its unpredictable. Sometimes being with people is the answer, sometimes it isn't at all, I just sneak the booze.

Yesterday I was still hung from Friday night, but in the afternoon stopped feeling quite so delicate and wobbly and actually cleaned the kitchen and did a couple loads of laundry. I keep thinking about what I did accomplish instead of what I did wrong this weekend, and keep taking it moment by moment. Easier for me to avoid depression that way.

I hope you can do that too. You are doing so much better than you were, big picture, aren't you?

As DG says to me day after day, don't give up giving it up.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I am a trainwreck!

Yo! So nice to *see* you sister!

aaargh. the mod thing. I gotta admit, I get that...finally. I sometimes freak myself out with the thought that I don't Ever Want To Drink Again. Then it becomes a thing. Anything that becomes a thing is not a good thing in Ne-land. I get to fixate on it and gnaw on it and aaargh.
Anyway, glad you're posting. Glad you're thinking. Glad you're ...still not giving up on giving up. (That's brilliant.)
xo

[RudyB]

I am a trainwreck!

heya taw. your name is being mentioned on the trip to chicago thread. begs the question: how ya doin'? check in, wouldja? we're rooting for you here, no matter what!
xo rudy

[RingingCedars]

I am a trainwreck!

Hey Taw--long time again. I don't come into meds often---but I do like to check on you and Bruun to see how you're doing. Why don't you check in hun?? People really do care. xo

[Ne/Neva Eva]

I am a trainwreck!

Ditto the thought, T.
xo and :l

[taw]

I am a trainwreck!

I am still a trainwreck! I do ok for a few days, then right back at it! This was an espeically bad weekend!

[Bruunhilde]

I am a trainwreck!

So sorry Taw, I know the feeling. Monday morning looms darkly but Sunday night was cozy and fun, but not worth the extra glass of wine I shouldn't have had.

What are your current strategies for the weekend, do you have any? I know I need to change out my plans, make myself do more social things. Next weekend I am seeing my uncle for lunch and maybe I'll see another friend the other day so I'm not so depressed...

[taw]

I am a trainwreck!

I will have my son this coming weekend, but baseball just finished so we will really have nothing to do! At least with baseball games I had a reason to stay relatively sober during the days! Maybe I will try bumping up the bac on the weekends...I also just bought a hypnosis cd...

I don't know...but something's gotta give!!!

[Bruunhilde]

I am a trainwreck!

When do you start wanting to drink, morning? Afternoon? Is there a danger time?