Disclaimer: Sorry for my bad english but I am a foreigner from the Netherlands.
Unfortunatly I've been strugling with my alcoholconsumption for about two years right now after drinking too much for 8 years.
After drinking without stopping for 5 years (18 till 23) I'd come to a point that I needed help. My financial, social and every situation imagineable was horrible. So I went to a rehab center. It wasn't a internal project, just some consults every month.
I've been in a rehab project for about half a year now and tried refusal this summer. Although it kept me clean for about 3 months, it still felt like a battle every day. After stopped using the refusal I gradually started my drinking again. Until the point I am right now.
In the 3 months of non-alcohol use I managed to get a good job and get things right. I was really proud of myself. Now that I am drinking again it is going the wrong way. Since i've been here before I know i'm sliding off again.
Slowly started to drink daily again, when I'm out with my friends I start binging again and miss my work. And when I'm off work... I invite some friends in my place and it's off.
In fact the worst thing is that when friends come to my place, I''ll have alcohol in my house the next day. So when I wake up the next day I feel so horrible I take a beer. Just saying in my head: "Just one, it will ease the hangover" After that one beer I start getting it again. This continues untill there is no alcohol anymore in my house.
At that point I'm able to tell myself: not tonight, you have to work tomorrow so that's the good thing. The bad thing is that I notice that it's going the wrong way.
The last months I got in much more fights (not physical) than in the whole summer. My drinking started to go up and I am missing workdays. Since I''m a freelancer that doesn''t matter: ill go the next day. But when I look to my behavior on a honest way I see i'm sliding off.
So that''s why I ordered baclofen in a very drunk mood. I''m tired of fighting everyday against the craving until the day arrives I allow myself to drink. Only finding myself in another fight or just a horrible morning. The only option is to stop totally, or try baclofen.
Since I've threw enough junk in my body the past couple of years, it wont matter much to try this one. So until it arrives I'm trying to obtain as much information as possible, this includes posting on this forum.
So after telling my story, here comes the question:
Since i'm not the drinking wiskeys or drinking all day/week long. I consider myself as an alcoholdependent person, not an alcoholic.
What should that do with the dose? Should I start lighter than normal or just work it up the ramp till it hits?
Maybe somebody who recognizes itself in this can give some good advice.
Thanks in advance,
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