Bac Me

[hopefulspirit]

I've been lurking about but haven't posted. I felt it was about time I contributed my progress.

I've been on Bac in various does and cycles since April of last year. There's been lots of ups and downs and the entire story would take pages here.

I'm not AF but I'm more sober than not. I found that my emotional addiction has been greatly improved with Bac and I can't imagine life without it. I also realized over the course of many months that there's an underlying physical addiction to sugar. In the beginning of the journey, I gave in to any sweet cravings but realized that sugar was feeding my addiction. The more I had the more I wanted. I know there's been a lot of discussion about this and there's a lot of material out there on the subject but I'm hoping that my realization might help someone else esp. in the early stages of detox.
Before going AF, I had a low carb lifestyle.. Among other reasons, it kept my weight in check. But I was feeding my "sweet tooth" with wine. Now that i've had that heavy cloud of too much alcohol consumption, I'm getting away from all sugars. One simple book that put a lot of this into perspective for me is titled "Potatoes Not Prozac" (google it for the website) which goes into "sugar sensitive people" and underlying physiological base for addiction. At this point, I'm committed to a low carb diet with as few drinking days as possible. I'm very envious of the people on Bac who are able to walk away after a couple of drinks... that is not me, yet. I have not been in a place where I can exceed much more than 200 mgs safely. The few times that I tried, I ended up lowering my dose due to the SE's.
Of course there is the psychological component as well. I think some form of support is necessary but for most of us that don't choose the AA form, this board is a lifesaver.
Currently, I am on 120 mgs per day and I can easily avoid alcohol except in social situation. I try not to beat myself up when I do indulge but the combination of bac and drinking is not a good combination for me. I tend to miss or skip a dose if I know I will indulge which is counter-productive but my means of managing some form of moderation.

So that is my story... For better or for worse... Bac does work, it really helps and many of the SE's that I had at this dose subsided.

--HS

[bleep69]

Bac Me

Another success. Baclofen 1 Alcohol 0. Good to hear hopeful, thanks for posting.

How long did it take you before you saw results, and at what dose was that? Are you still titrating up in search of the switch?

Thanks,

Bleep.

[seeking_serenity]

Bac Me

hopefulspirit;1047315 wrote: I've been lurking about but haven't posted. I felt it was about time I contributed my progress.

I've been on Bac in various does and cycles since April of last year. There's been lots of ups and downs and the entire story would take pages here.

I'm not AF but I'm more sober than not. I found that my emotional addiction has been greatly improved with Bac and I can't imagine life without it. I also realized over the course of many months that there's an underlying physical addiction to sugar. In the beginning of the journey, I gave in to any sweet cravings but realized that sugar was feeding my addiction. The more I had the more I wanted. I know there's been a lot of discussion about this and there's a lot of material out there on the subject but I'm hoping that my realization might help someone else esp. in the early stages of detox.
Before going AF, I had a low carb lifestyle.. Among other reasons, it kept my weight in check. But I was feeding my "sweet tooth" with wine. Now that i've had that heavy cloud of too much alcohol consumption, I'm getting away from all sugars. One simple book that put a lot of this into perspective for me is titled "Potatoes Not Prozac" (google it for the website) which goes into "sugar sensitive people" and underlying physiological base for addiction. At this point, I'm committed to a low carb diet with as few drinking days as possible. I'm very envious of the people on Bac who are able to walk away after a couple of drinks... that is not me, yet. I have not been in a place where I can exceed much more than 200 mgs safely. The few times that I tried, I ended up lowering my dose due to the SE's.
Of course there is the psychological component as well. I think some form of support is necessary but for most of us that don't choose the AA form, this board is a lifesaver.
Currently, I am on 120 mgs per day and I can easily avoid alcohol except in social situation. I try not to beat myself up when I do indulge but the combination of bac and drinking is not a good combination for me. I tend to miss or skip a dose if I know I will indulge which is counter-productive but my means of managing some form of moderation.

So that is my story... For better or for worse... Bac does work, it really helps and many of the SE's that I had at this dose subsided.

--HS

First of all, :welcome:

And re: the sugar thing, I am also aware (and convinced!) of the sugar/alcohol connection. I started a low-carb thing recently, but I've found that sometimes I CRAVE sugar like nothing else! It's a constant struggle, and one that I often lose lately. Still, sugar > alcohol at this point, so if you NEED to have sugar, I figure it's better for you than drinking.

I LOVE the 120mgs/day level, and I will probably go back down to that once I hit my switch. I really love the way I feel at that level. For me, getting up the the 150mg/day level was difficult, and it's taken a while. But now that I'm comfortably there, I feel fine...great, actually. It gets harder to go up to higher doses, but even neva eva (who's at 260/day right now, if I remember correctly) is doing well at that high dose. It just takes time and patience. Just keep taking the damn pills! If you see people writing "jttdp" at the end of their posts, it's become a mantra for those of us here.

Anyway, hope you stick around and keep taking the pills. Going up in dosage can be scary and frustrating, but it can also be superbly rewarding. Hope all is well with you! :h And MAJOR congrats on your sobriety!

[hopefulspirit]

Bac Me

I'm actually titrating down or at least regrouping my schedule. Since I never drank in the daytime anyway, I see no need to dose early in the day so I just reduced my 9:00 a.m. to 20 mgs instead of 40 mgs. I'm just doing a wait and see right now. I'm not tempted to drink... recently, at a restaurant, I noticed someone drinking a glass of wine and found myself not at all desiring it. But that's not my real problem... my real problem occurs at night a great meal or a cocktail party or a basketball game or a....(fill in blank). That's when I usually break down and give myself a license to drink. Unlike some of you, bac hasn't made me moderate during those times, and in fact, I get quite sick. I think it's pretty unsafe and scary to drink heavily on bac.
That is why I have found myself cutting back on my dosage when I know I'll break down... counterproductive to say the least.
I could ramp up again but can't afford to lose my mind anytime soon. It seems anything over 180 sends me into a forgetful, paranoid, almost manic state. Maybe I've titrated too quickly in the past.

-HS

[Sebsta]

Bac Me

I have started taking bac last week and drunk pretty heavily on it and felt quite fine. Reason for the session was that my friend was still staying with me and she likes to party and I couldn't resist it. Now as she is gone I am having bac's effects first time being properly sober and I have to say, I feel great just on 10mg tablet! I already feel resilience to the thought that I want to drink. How amazing. It's my conviction to stay AF from this Monday ( after 6 weeks of constant binging) and I think without back I would end up as usual - drunk 2 days later.

I am being very careful with bac and higher doses are for me a spacey adventure to which I do not want to raise. I simply believe that some will power and some evening upping the dose will get me through the cravings. Which predominantly exist in the evening. Today I fel great all day after taking 10mg at around 13.00. It's 18.15 and I still feel relaxed and when I tested my mind about having alcohol, ( which normally would react with increased anxiety and looking for a time slot after work to buy and consume) I felt quite relaxed and mellow.

Often when I idealize about going out and having fun I instantly get anxiety attack and have a 'cannot wait' feeling. I didn't have it now, how amazing. I know it's too early to say anything and I know I haven't switched at all, but how extraordinary this is to experience the thought free mind that relaxes and is concentrated on something else.

Now I have a bottle of 100 10mg pills with me and will be looking to take it only as PRN ( when needed) and increase the dose on my days off work.

Now I partially think that my desire to drink was related to reduction of anxiety that comes and goes, and once that's cured i will not have a need to consume to calm myself down as I can do it with Bac. I tried diazopam ( Valium) to see how it worked and it had similar effect on me. But what a difference in price.

If I stay AF on such a low dose and my nightmare with Alcohol will finish I think I will go bananas from the happiness that will encircle my body. I cannot believe that this tablet can actually help, I hope that yesterday was the first day of my life. I am counting AF days and hope for the best.

Hope my story will help some people if they make a connection anxiety=need to drink. No anxiety+will power=AF life.

[hopefulspirit]

Bac Me

OK - Here I am...

I just dosed up 220 mgs. It may be too much but I've been on this journey for a year rather sporadically and I'm just going to push it to the limit. I feel like my body is so accustom to bac that it should be fine.

It's do or die and I'm going to post it here as I move into the next dimension.

I really need to embrace this community because no one else gets it. Even if you have a therapist on board, supporting you through all this, they are really learning from us.

After writing and then deleting/editing.. the bac has set in. I had flushing and tinnitus but I'm fine, will be fine... will get through all of this.

I hope that sounds convincing???

-HS

[alexan]

Bac Me

Thanks for posting Hopeful, hope you are well...
Can't wait to hear more.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Bac Me


Hi, HS. It's convincing enough, if you're convinced!

220mg is not a small number... How did that go?

Glad your bac, looking forward to hearing your plan...

:l
Ne

[bleep]

Bac Me

Hi Hopeful,

It's been a while since your dose - how did it go? I have found my best results from baclofen come from consistent dosing, rather than spikes and troughs. Otter puts it very well, in that you want to mimic the supply you would receive if your brain produced it normally.

And, as Ne puts it, what's you plan?

Good luck.

[hopefulspirit]

Bac Me

bleep;1095290 wrote: Hi Hopeful,
I have found my best results from baclofen come from consistent dosing, rather than spikes and troughs. Otter puts it very well, in that you want to mimic the supply you would receive if your brain produced it normally.

And, as Ne puts it, what's you plan?

Good luck.

I'm really not as reckless as I may sound. Keep in mind, I've stayed steady and stable at the higher doses for quite some time.
So, all in all, last night went OK but not comfortably OK...
I got an intense pulsing feeling and ringing in the ears. Today I was spacey and only managed to tolerate 200 mgs.
Other than last night, I've never managed more than 200 and found myself stuck in the 120-160 then 180 range for a long time.
I'm trying to move beyond that without any further damage to my reputation, my family's well-being and my health.
Last week I ended up in er over a broken coffee cup slashed my hand (no AL involved) but I attribute this lack of coordination to the large amounts of bac in my system. I've fallen, added dings to my car etc. And there's no way to explain this peculiar behavior to the outside world... and to be honest, it's not easy after this amount of time, with your closest friends and family.

I just really need this to work or remove it from my life. Its caused it's own kind of havoc that will only be worth it if I reach indifference.

And, I didn't realize how hard this could be.

Ne: A good part of my inspiration came from reading your thread on upward titration and also from my own risky urge to drink. I'm learning the hard way how important it is to take care of your issues so that when the time comes, you're really there in a crises. I'm in a (family health) crises right now and I could not be dealing with it if I were drinking. Because of this, my plan is a work-in-progress and a day-by-day exercise.
So tomorrow I will make an appointment to see my therapist (the one whose watching my progress as if I were a lab rat), exercise, keep popping pills & posting. I'm also going to focus on "consistent dosing". I want to maintain 200 for a week and then push it back to 220.

Thanks for reading,
-HShttps://www.mywayout.org/community/images/smilies/thanks.gif

[Cinders]

Bac Me

bleep;1095290 wrote: Hi Hopeful,

It's been a while since your dose - how did it go? I have found my best results from baclofen come from consistent dosing, rather than spikes and troughs. Otter puts it very well, in that you want to mimic the supply you would receive if your brain produced it normally.

And, as Ne puts it, what's you plan?

Good luck.

Bleep,

What do you mean by consistent dosing? Throughout the day or in general?

I am struggling with how frequently to take my Bac doses as I go up.

HS,

Hang in there. We've seen too many succeed at this!!

:goodjob:

Love,
Cindi

[bleep]

Bac Me

I think both Cindi.

The even spacing through the day helped in my case to alleviate SE's, and you do want to mimic your brain secreting the chemical as much as possible. OF course, if every time you take it you want to vomit, that's simply not feasible, so a middle ground is needed.

In general, it's important that you are consistent with your dose. Suddenly spiking to 400mg's then dropping to 100mg's doesn't really help, it just wastes baclofen, and gives you a strange few hours. Of course, if you spike, then remain at your spike, you are being consistent, just titrating very quickly. I think consistency is important here because at any level, it needs time to do whatever it is that it does.

Bear in mind that all this is obviously guesswork on my part!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Bac Me

Nice plan, Hopeful. Eyes on the goal and all...

Ne

[redhead77]

Bac Me

Hi HS,

How's it going? I think it's been a week now. We've been acquainted, as you know. I am thrilled you started your own thread. I too struggle with sugar cravings. Had them before the drinking. I think that's why I became addicted to booze and not other substances. Just wanted to give you a shout out, and tell you I'm thinking of you.

[hopefulspirit]

Bac Me

This is the 3rd time I'm writing this. I lose my posts whenever I go to advanced. So pardon the lack of smileys...
I posted that I was titrating up to 220 10 days ago. There's always lots of moving parts in my life and keeping track of doses is always a challenge for me but the days that followed that dose have been unreal.

At one point in the 200 range, I lost my medication. I was losing everything... I had brain fog and major processing issues. Memory loss is a serious underlying concern already but this was something different.
On one morning I woke with extreme pain in almost all extremities. I almost called an ambulance but it subsided.
The disorientation continued to the point that I lost my medication for a night and missed 50 mgs of my dosage. Thereafter, I developed paranoia. I *believed* my house was staked, I believed there were paparazzi waiting for the shot... I believed that the only way to get out of the situation was to commit suicide. I took an inventory of our pills (nothing that will killya kind) and proceeded to close blinds and hide. When my husband realized that I was in the same state as the night before, he talked me into going to the hospital. I rationalized this as a more dignified way of meeting my inevitable fate.

I can only imagine how this sounds without the full story and details (those actually make it more disturbing) but I have never really experienced full blown paranoia which is what that was.

I even thought our nanny was working against me... the list goes on and on...

I ended up in ER. My doc and Psychiatrist were notified and there I went... cops sat outside the er door waiting for me to go into lock down.

One of my fears was that I'd give Bac a bad reputation... but I had more convoluted fears than that.
They lowered the Bac to 40mgs and added Seroquel and Adavan to bring me back down to reality. But even as it wore itself off, I had a hard time shaking the realness of what it was and find myself thankful to be alive.

It's also the first time I thought of having a drink in my house in a very long time *but* if you were avoiding the paparazzi and cops for a couple of day, that just might be normal.

I have a very new appreciation for this drug. I tend to stomach much and lose the respect of the potency involved.

They dropped me to 40mgs while i was there. I added 20 since I've been home. They also gave me seraquel to sleep.

I actually don't know where to go from here. I am concerned about my memory and might not ever be able to take more than 160. I can't ever go back to that altered state of mind.

There might also be some other neurological condition going on.

I searched paranoia on the boards but didn't find anything... is it a known side effect or am I potentially Schizophrenic?
I do not want to give Bac a bad reputation. I can feel it but have never found total indifference.
Thanks for listening...
HP