Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphyx;1080051 wrote: I?ve And before anyone gets all uppity, I?m not being Anti-American, I?m not dissing your country, I?m not wiping my arse on the stars and stripes, I haven?t slapped Oprah Winfrey or grabbed Sarah Palin?s bum????sorry I just wanted a moment to think about that last one. ... While the Swedish Snus is lovely and gentle and athletic and has big tits.

:H
and


I would pay decent money, even good money, to see Sarah Palin goosed.

That was actually kinda fun... So when you're ready to get off this merry-go-round, let's have another go... This time I want to play for the other team.

[LadyLush]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

And,

No longer is this thread awry....Yippee! You got it back to the mess it was :goodjob:


Love ya,
Lady

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Yesterday I tasted dog shit and it was good. But more on that later.

This morning I had to drive through the rural north of my county to meet a couple of clients and it was beautiful. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, there were very few cars on the road and it was a balmy 12?C (time to break out the mankini and upset the neighbours). This area is pretty flat (that?s what I miss most about West Wales, there are no hills to speak of here), but you get big skies and that can be beautiful in its own way. I slipped ?Ladies of the Canyon? into the CD player and I was a child again. I was back with Joni, my first love. I was driving along and smiling, ?Ahh, the bac-smile? I thought to myself, but then I realised it?s not the bac-smile, it?s just me. That?s how I used to be before my life went to bollocks, before addiction took hold and I tried to flush my life down the crapper. But even before that, before adolescence when depression started to raise its ugly head, I used to be happy. I used to smile.

I?m back to where I was before. And I think this is why I?ve had such an easy ride of it. Why I?m not questioning the ?switch? and why I do not have to worry about drinking the occasional beer. I?m not afraid of addiction because I?ve beaten it. It?s gone. It?s not a matter of watching my every step to make sure I don?t tread on the beast and wake it once more, because the beast has left. And as long as I keep taking the pills, as long as I titrate slowly down to my maintenance dose and stay there, it can not return.

So there I am driving along at peace with the world and it dawns on me why some people here talk about being careful not to become re-addicted and whether or not the switch is real. Maybe they haven?t actually switched. **At this point just assume everything I?m saying is accompanied by an ?IMO? so no one gets their knickers in a twist** We know that baclofen often reduces the craving for alcohol regardless of a switch. For some people the reduced craving is enough for them to use willpower or whatever ?tools? they may have learnt to allow them to become abstinent. They then assume they?ve switched because they took baclofen and now they don?t drink. That?s what the switch means right? NO!!!!! It doesn?t mean that! The switch is when you no longer have the craving, the preoccupation with alcohol or the obsessive thoughts. If you?re worrying about whether or not an occasional drink will flip you back to addiction then YOU HAVE NOT SWITCHED. If you aren?t comfortable with and can not rely on the new addiction free you, then YOU HAVE NOT SWITCHED.

I repeat HAVING THE OCCASIONAL DRINK AFTER THE SWITCH DOES NOT LEAD TO AN ALCOHOLIC DOWNFALL. However, since I found out that one of the people who previously objected to that statement actually stopped taking baclofen, then I should have said HAVING THE OCCASIONAL DRINK AFTER THE SWITCH DOES NOT LEAD TO AN ALCOHOLIC DOWNFALL SO LONG AS YOU FIND YOUR MAINTENANCE DOSE AND KEEP TO IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Sigh.

High dose baclofen as a cure for addiction does not work for everyone. Dr L talks about a 99% success rate. That seems suspiciously high, but then again I don?t blame him; the chances of a patient sticking with the treatment are much higher if the patient believes they are almost certain to be cured. Elsewhere I?ve seen much lower success rates. On the French forum they talk about 85%. But that?s a very high cure rate. I think I?ve also seen a figure of 60%, but for the life of me I can?t remember where. Whatever the number cured, a large number of the rest will have been helped by baclofen to either reduce their consumption or even to become abstinent. So it?s been a success for them also.

Anyway back to the dog shit. When I say it ?tasted good? I am of course exaggerating, it was foul, it was disgusting, I felt sick and wanted to rip my tongue out by its root and burn it, but it wasn?t the worst thing I?ve ever tasted. The worst thing I ever tasted was Kale crisps (chips). They are Satan?s arse flakes. Those who promote their use are surely Lucifer?s minions, laughing at the pathetic mortals who they convince to pollute their bodies with such pure evil. But then again, some people like them so what do I know?

By the way, I didn't deliberately taste dog shit. I think I ought to point that out. Yeah sure I'm into German, midget, scat porn (who isn't right?) but I'm not interested in actually doing that sort of thing. I was in the park and I picked up one of my hounds' turds in a poop bag and tied it up. Then my other dog dropped a log and I took out another bag. I licked my finger in order to help open the bag and it turns out I must have been careless on the previous occasion because I suddenly had shit in my mouth.

I tried to spit it out. I was bent over, retching and spitting on the ground, I was making loud noises of disgust and swearing out loud when I noticed an old man had stopped about 10 feet from me. He was looking at me, slowly shaking his head and tutting quietly. I stood up straight and said to him "how would you like dog shit in your mouth?". He looked at the turd bag in my hand and with a look of terror, he quickly shuffled off. I then realised he had mistaken my explanation for a threat. And the funny thing is, 3 months ago, he would probably have been right.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphyx;1081699 wrote: I’m back to where I was before. And I think this is why I’ve had such an easy ride of it. Why I’m not questioning the ‘switch’ and why I do not have to worry about drinking the occasional beer. I’m not afraid of addiction because I’ve beaten it. It’s gone. It’s not a matter of watching my every step to make sure I don’t tread on the beast and wake it once more, because the beast has left. And as long as I keep taking the pills, as long as I titrate slowly down to my maintenance dose and stay there, it can not return.You're right. I've switched. 'nuf said, except it's Ne so I've got more to say. It's a profound experience. Yours is the only description I've read that nailed it for me, though Edo and bleep have come close.

Why do I doubt? because I'm afraid it will go away. But I am me. Finally. Beer/wine/midget porn, doesn't matter. STILL me. Finally.
Thank you.
Everything I've posted about this on here, on my thread and elsewhere was fucking wrong. Flat out.

Murphyx;1081699 wrote: The worst thing I ever tasted was Kale crisps (chips). They are Satan’s arse flakes. Those who promote their use are surely Lucifer’s minions, laughing at the pathetic mortals who they convince to pollute their bodies with such pure evil. But then again, some people like them so what do I know?

By the way, I didn't deliberately taste dog shit. I think I ought to point that out. Yeah sure I'm into German, midget, scat porn (who isn't right?) but I'm not interested in actually doing that sort of thing. I was in the park and I picked up one of my hounds' turds in a poop bag and tied it up. Then my other dog dropped a log and I took out another bag. I licked my finger in order to help open the bag and it turns out I must have been careless on the previous occasion because I suddenly had shit in my mouth.

I tried to spit it out. I was bent over, retching and spitting on the ground, I was making loud noises of disgust and swearing out loud when I noticed an old man had stopped about 10 feet from me. He was looking at me, slowly shaking his head and tutting quietly. I stood up straight and said to him "how would you like dog shit in your mouth?". He looked at the turd bag in my hand and with a look of terror, he quickly shuffled off. I then realised he had mistaken my explanation for a threat. And the funny thing is, 3 months ago, he would probably have been right.

Tears are still streaming down my face.
Thank you again. I've been waiting for you...
Ne
apparently one of lucifer's minions, though I think I am a jedi princess now. just sayin

[Chi]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphyx;1081699 wrote:

I was driving along and smiling, ?Ahh, the bac-smile? I thought to myself, but then I realised it?s not the bac-smile, it?s just me. That?s how I used to be before my life went to bollocks, before addiction took hold and I tried to flush my life down the crapper. But even before that, before adolescence when depression started to raise its ugly head, I used to be happy. I used to smile.

I am very happy for you!

I too think that high dose bac treats anxiety/depression in a profound way.

Smiling is a good thing :rays:

[bleep]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Great post Murph. I agree fully, despite my recent actions! I can imagine dog shit tasting foul indeed, and the bit in the middle about the switch is spot, spot on.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Ne/Neva Eva;1081708 wrote: You're right. I've switched. 'nuf said, except it's Ne so I've got more to say. It's a profound experience. Yours is the only description I've read that nailed it for me, though Edo and bleep have come close.

Why do I doubt? because I'm afraid it will go away. But I am me. Finally. Beer/wine/midget porn, doesn't matter. STILL me. Finally.
Thank you.
Everything I've posted about this on here, on my thread and elsewhere was fucking wrong. Flat out.

I would add to this that when I drank last it took me right back to the bad place, in my mind and in my brain. Everything was awry for days afterward. I respect that you don't have this reaction to drinking. I suspect that it may have to do with the fact that I wasn't just having a beer, I was drinking against my will because I had taken too little baclofen. That's a scary place to return to so quickly after finding freedom.
Was that not your experience when you got really, really drunk Murph?
Ne

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

When I titrated down too fast I felt compelled to drink. I didn't want to drink and, even though I got drunk, I didn't enjoy the experience. So yeah I was back to a scary place. But at the same time I knew that once I go back to my switch dose it would be over and the compulsion would be gone. And it was, so no harm done.

It wasn't having a drink that caused either of us to get fully blown rat arsed, it was the lack of bac.

I've got to say I am reluctant to try to titrate down again because I don't want that crap to happen again, but if I do it slowly it should be OK and if I over step the maintenance dose then I know I can get back to safety with an increase.

Bac rules!

[Guest]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

I didn't have the 'profound' switch experience as many describe here, BUT the desire to drink simply disappeared when I got to my current dose (180mgs) and I've stayed like this ever since - which is now 3 weeks. I was wondering if this is because I was rarely a daily drinker, more a binge drinker apart from when I initially started Baclofen and gave myself 'permission' to drink every day. All I know now is that alcohol doesn't bother me in the slightest, and I don't even debate having a drink because I'm simply disinterested in alcohol. I drank for effect not taste so this means I can't see any point for me in having a drink now I've reached the 'switch'. Could just do with some of the euphoria you all report now! I was usually a very happy, grateful person most of the time when sober in the past. For some reason this time I'm very gloomy about it all.

[bleep]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Well, at least the desire is gone! A resounding success from that point of view UK. Perhaps as you slowly decrease the happy glow will find you at a certain level.

I never understood that about baclofen - if, at a certain level, a SE is present, why does it disappear if you go up. It would make much more sense to me if you just accumulated SE's as you increased the dose. Thankfully this isn't the case though, but it's a shame with some of the nice SE's.

[Road to Recovery]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphyx;1081699 wrote:

I?m back to where I was before. And I think this is why I?ve had such an easy ride of it. Why I?m not questioning the ?switch? and why I do not have to worry about drinking the occasional beer. I?m not afraid of addiction because I?ve beaten it. It?s gone. It?s not a matter of watching my every step to make sure I don?t tread on the beast and wake it once more, because the beast has left. And as long as I keep taking the pills, as long as I titrate slowly down to my maintenance dose and stay there, it can not return.

Murph,
Congratulations! You have beaten addiction! So you dont smoke anymore, correct? Since you have beaten addiction and smoking is an addiction - I can only be led to believe that you are not a smoker anymore. Good on you! I though baclofen helped with drinking but as stated above - IT CURES ALL ADDICTION!

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Ukblonde;1081790 wrote: Could just do with some of the euphoria you all report now! I've never reported euphoria. Happiness yes, euphoria no. And I haven't gone searching for it either.
I was usually a very happy, grateful person most of the time when sober in the past. For some reason this time I'm very gloomy about it all.

Some people think baclofen is a cure-all for all psychological problems. I don't agree. It appears to be an anxiolytic, judging by the number of people who have reported that effect, but for the rest, I'm not so sure.

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Road to Recovery;1081794 wrote: Murph,
Congratulations! You have beaten addiction! So you dont smoke anymore, correct? Since you have beaten addiction and smoking is an addiction - I can only be led to believe that you are not a smoker anymore. Good on you! I though baclofen helped with drinking but as stated above - IT CURES ALL ADDICTION!

Oh I see what you did there. Well done. I can see you're a sharp one.

But I didn't say "it cures all addiction". I don't have all addictions so I can't say that. For instance I'm not addicted to whopping my willy out and thrashing it against my computer screen and screaming "yes, yes, that'll teach him. I'll show him how smart I am. YES, YES, YES!!!!".

I don't know why it doesn't cure the smoking addiction. To be honest I don't care. One thing at a time eh, my friend.

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

I expect Miss Abby will be along any moment now. It is her turn after all. :H

[bleep]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

I think it probably does help with smoking, but the habit part of the addiction is a huge factor.