Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary
Well that was the most shit-filled and fucked up day of my recent life. Actually, it was my head that was shit-filled and fucked up, not the day, that was actually quite normal in hindsight, but to me it was the day from hell. Deep deeeeeeeeeep depression, not pleasant and thankfully extremely rare; it’s been years since that’s happened. When it does it’s best to stay in doors, away from other people and try to keep the beast caged. If I’m not careful I can end up doing bad things that end up biting me in the ass (did you see what I did there? I said “ass”, just so the Americans don’t get all confused and indignant about the “goddam limey fuckers talking foreign shit on our goddam forum, after we pulled their goddam chestnuts out the fire in WWII and this is the sort of gratitude we get? We should bomb the goddamm mothafukkahhhhhs!"). The odd thing is, on this occasion I didn’t even consider numbing the pain with booze. Strange.
Well not that strange as I haven’t had a drink for 9 days. Haven’t had even the slightest urge for one either. I ‘switched’ nearly 4 months ago and in that time I haven’t needed to drink. I haven’t wanted to drink, but I’ve been continuing to have one (sometimes less than one, sometimes just a sip of one) most days when I cook the evening meal. HABITS AGGGGH!!! Habits are a bitch to break (apologies to any bitches reading this) and this habit has been annoying the shit out of me.
I looked back through this thread to see what my early, post switch, thoughts were on the subject and I found, along with some very strange comments about sheep abuse and the apparent comic nature of suet-based puddings, that as I suspected, it’s been bugging me from the start and I’ve been looking for a way to break it.
Just like smoking; I use Wellbutrin, which as Zyban is used as a smoking cessation aid, and occasionally I use snus, which together take away both the need and the urge to smoke, but I continue to smoke through habit. I know I’m doing it out of habit but it doesn’t make any difference, I just keep on puffing away.
So, I went away on the 21st and from that day, because my routine was broken, so was my habit. I wasn’t in my kitchen, cooking and doing the thing I’ve always done i.e. cracking open some booze. I’ve been back 5 days and haven’t reverted back to my earlier state. Habit broken.
I know a lot of people are fighting their own habit. They have switched, or they feel a greatly reduced urge to drink, but their particular habit is getting in the way. When the habit drink is triggered, it might result in just the one, or it might be a habit that requires a full on rat-arsed drunk. Either way it’s just habit. And habits can be broken. Mine was fairly simple to address; I just had to get away from the trigger for a while and voila! For others it won’t be so simple, but whatever your own situation you need to find a way. You could just white-knuckle your way through the triggers but I don’t believe that will leave you with the permanent closure you need.
You need to think about when and why you reach for that drink and look for a way to absent yourself from those situations. Easier said than done, I know, but baclofen will only remove the need and the craving for drink, there’s still another step you need to take.
BACLOFEN WORKS. BACLOFEN IS THE DOG'S BOLLOCKS!
Now, back to the usual irrelevant bollocks and generalised Murph-hate so beloved of you bunch of wankers. :l:h
Well that was the most shit-filled and fucked up day of my recent life. Actually, it was my head that was shit-filled and fucked up, not the day, that was actually quite normal in hindsight, but to me it was the day from hell. Deep deeeeeeeeeep depression, not pleasant and thankfully extremely rare; it’s been years since that’s happened. When it does it’s best to stay in doors, away from other people and try to keep the beast caged. If I’m not careful I can end up doing bad things that end up biting me in the ass (did you see what I did there? I said “ass”, just so the Americans don’t get all confused and indignant about the “goddam limey fuckers talking foreign shit on our goddam forum, after we pulled their goddam chestnuts out the fire in WWII and this is the sort of gratitude we get? We should bomb the goddamm mothafukkahhhhhs!"). The odd thing is, on this occasion I didn’t even consider numbing the pain with booze. Strange.
Well not that strange as I haven’t had a drink for 9 days. Haven’t had even the slightest urge for one either. I ‘switched’ nearly 4 months ago and in that time I haven’t needed to drink. I haven’t wanted to drink, but I’ve been continuing to have one (sometimes less than one, sometimes just a sip of one) most days when I cook the evening meal. HABITS AGGGGH!!! Habits are a bitch to break (apologies to any bitches reading this) and this habit has been annoying the shit out of me.
I looked back through this thread to see what my early, post switch, thoughts were on the subject and I found, along with some very strange comments about sheep abuse and the apparent comic nature of suet-based puddings, that as I suspected, it’s been bugging me from the start and I’ve been looking for a way to break it.
Just like smoking; I use Wellbutrin, which as Zyban is used as a smoking cessation aid, and occasionally I use snus, which together take away both the need and the urge to smoke, but I continue to smoke through habit. I know I’m doing it out of habit but it doesn’t make any difference, I just keep on puffing away.
So, I went away on the 21st and from that day, because my routine was broken, so was my habit. I wasn’t in my kitchen, cooking and doing the thing I’ve always done i.e. cracking open some booze. I’ve been back 5 days and haven’t reverted back to my earlier state. Habit broken.
I know a lot of people are fighting their own habit. They have switched, or they feel a greatly reduced urge to drink, but their particular habit is getting in the way. When the habit drink is triggered, it might result in just the one, or it might be a habit that requires a full on rat-arsed drunk. Either way it’s just habit. And habits can be broken. Mine was fairly simple to address; I just had to get away from the trigger for a while and voila! For others it won’t be so simple, but whatever your own situation you need to find a way. You could just white-knuckle your way through the triggers but I don’t believe that will leave you with the permanent closure you need.
You need to think about when and why you reach for that drink and look for a way to absent yourself from those situations. Easier said than done, I know, but baclofen will only remove the need and the craving for drink, there’s still another step you need to take.
BACLOFEN WORKS. BACLOFEN IS THE DOG'S BOLLOCKS!
Now, back to the usual irrelevant bollocks and generalised Murph-hate so beloved of you bunch of wankers. :l:h
nfire: fat rapidly. I need to take in more or I'll keep on losing weight. As long as I remain active I can eat cookies, brownies and ice cream on a daily basis for months on end and gain only 10-15lbs (1/2 of it water weight).
Comment