Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

[LadyLush]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murph,

Well yesterday you had 11 votes and a 5 star rating. Today you have 14 votes and have dropped to a 4 star rating.

Must have been the cock...or maybe the coot. :H


LL:l

[Bruunhilde]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Both damn birds contributed, I'm sure. Where do you see the vote count, Lush?

DG, razor sharp, girl!!!!!

[LadyLush]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Now 15 votes...up tp a 14.2

And it WAS NOT me.

Bruun at the top of the page you will see stars. If you put your curser over them it will show you the number of votes and the average.

Those damn birds - brilliant! :H

LL:l

[SlipperyPete]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphy,

You remember that time in 1982 when you were driving your orange Beatle, and I was coming up behind you in my Porsche, and you cut me off kinda? Yeah, well I remember, and I tracked you down, and made 2 accounts and rated your thread 1 star with both of them. NOW we're even! Haha!!

[Doggygirl]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

SlipperyPete;1147784 wrote: Murphy,

You remember that time in 1982 when you were driving your orange Beatle, and I was coming up behind you in my Porsche, and you cut me off kinda? Yeah, well I remember, and I tracked you down, and made 2 accounts and rated your thread 1 star with both of them. NOW we're even! Haha!!

:H:H:H

[Bruunhilde]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Thx Lush. Pete :H

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

You're all a bit strange. :H

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

I?ve started running. Don?t point and laugh at me, it?s just rude. As part of my new fitness regime, exercise and diet (no more spotted dick :upset: ) I?ve been using an exercise bike for the cardio part. But that?s boring as hell and so I decided to try running. I haven?t done it for a few years and the last time it wasn?t exactly a barrel of laughs, but I was pleasantly surprised this time around. So for the last few days I?ve been running with the dogs, on their morning exercise on the meads. Today, one of my half-witted, arse-brained dogs tripped me up. I went flying and landed on my left hip, which has been painful for the last week for some god-unknown reason. And it hurt like buggery.

I feel I ought to point out that?s just an expression. I?ve never actually experienced the pain of buggery, but I?m told it can smart a tad.

Then around midday my P.C. started to have a crisis of identity. I?ve always wanted him to be a working computer and up till now he?s complied. But now he?s decided he doesn?t like the whole do what Murph says thing and rather he ought to follow his true vocation, which is to be an ornament. A big fat, ugly, grey, floor ornament. I disagreed. We had words. I think we both regret the colourful language used, well I do anyway, but then I think I?m much more reasonable than he is; I do what is expected of me (mostly) and so should he.

I left him with an ultimatum: either be reasonable and do as I require of you or suffer the consequences. I went to the park with the dogs for our afternoon constitutional, they all full of beans and keen to go, me in agony with my knackered hip. I decided that when I got back, if he still wasn?t being reasonable, I was going to kick him to death. I made sure he knew this before I left and to emphasise the point I gave him a few sharp digs.

I hobbled round the park, silently cursing the breeder who sold me the evil Collie, and just as I thought the day couldn?t get any worse, fate decided otherwise and completely pissed on my chips by handing me a split poop bag with which to pick up my dog?s turd. Fortunately I realised what had happened and although there was no dog-shit tasting nastiness, I did have to suffer the indignity of wiping my shit-covered hand on the grass in front of appalled adults and hugely amused children.

When I returned home, I discovered my PC was determined still to be the ornament he?d always actually wanted to be. Now I am writing this on my back-up computer, which really can?t be considered anything but a very short term replacement. It?s a netbook. It has a ridiculously small keyboard, utterly unsuited to my large fingers and a tiny screen, which I have great difficulty reading since I lost my reading glasses. I hate it, but not as much as I hate my new floor ornament. I am planning his death; it will be extremely violent. No more chances. I tried to be reasonable, but reason means nothing to it; now it must die.

My crappy 24 hours actually began last night. I was drinking a large cup of tea and chatting to Mrs Murph. I can?t remember what I was saying, I can only assume it was extremely interesting and hugely amusing (as always), but suddenly I fell asleep. I fell asleep mid sentence. I awoke with a searing pain in my leg from the tea which I had spilled. I had been asleep for only a millisecond, but asleep I was. And it happened again later in the evening, twice. I didn?t just gradually nod off, I suddenly?just?slept, but only for a split second and both the other times I was actively engaged in something: on one occasion cooking and the other walking along the garden.

WTF????

Is this to do with my increased bac level, or just more Murph-weirdness?

[Bruunhilde]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Dang, Murph, sleeping while walking in the garden is a new feat. Maybe next time you'll luck out and sleep during turd duty and miss the part where the shit got on your hands. I hate when that happens. Go live in Paris, I hear you don't pick up your shit there, but rather leave it to moulder and smell up the streets around the major tourist attractions. Maybe you should reconsider getting behind the wheel at this dose.

Also, restrain yourself with the PC, it may be done with you but if you recycle the electronic thing it can have a new life with someone who needs it more. Maybe that's its gambit, it's done with For Profit work and wants to be altruistic vs work for you. And it was probably tired of all the porn. And maybe it's a girl, not a boy, and that's pissing it off. All that poking would have any woman slapping back.

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

How could anyone tire of porn? You do talk some awful tosh sometimes Bruun.

It must and will die.

[Doggygirl]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

I wish I could send Mr. Doggy over to the Murph House pronto to fix your floor ornament. (that's what he does for a living, thank goodness, or I would have kicked my own computer to death long long ago!)

Wow - falling asleep like that sounds really scary. Do you think that will improve with more time at this dose?

The last time I had that broken bag thing happen, I was PICKING UP SOMEBODY ELSE's DOG'S CRAP!!! That experience cured me of ever picking up other people's dog's crap, that's fur sure. (OK - and I'm secretly laughing with the kids...)

DG

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Doggygirl;1147867 wrote:
Wow - falling asleep like that sounds really scary. Do you think that will improve with more time at this dose?No idea. It's strange. Not entirely sure it'd bac related.

Doggygirl;1147867 wrote: The last time I had that broken bag thing happen, I was PICKING UP SOMEBODY ELSE's DOG'S CRAP!!! That experience cured me of ever picking up other people's dog's crap, that's fur sure. (OK - and I'm secretly laughing with the kids...)

DG

Other dog's crap is always so much more disgusting. :H

[fluff]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Murphyx;1147873 wrote:

Other dog's crap is always so much more disgusting. :H

I believe that rings true with people crap as well- your own crap/b.o. doesn't smell so bad to you as it does to others- this my daughter pointed out to me in one of her wonderous " did you know that....?" She thinks it's the human side of marking one's own territory...

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Doggygirl;1147746 wrote: That soft, feathery thing is a COCK???? That's it. I'm giving this thread 1 star.Hey, it's actually like Lo0p's love handles, it may look soft but really it's hard as steel. And boyfriends love to hold on to it. OK, I may have pushed the analogy too far there.
SlipperyPete;1147784 wrote: Murphy,

You remember that time in 1982 when you were driving your orange Beatle, and I was coming up behind you in my Porsche, and you cut me off kinda? Yeah, well I remember, and I tracked you down, and made 2 accounts and rated your thread 1 star with both of them. NOW we're even! Haha!!

You sonofabich! Today I'm gonna look out for your Porsche and side swipe it with my VW and it'll be your fault Pete, YOUR FAULT. I assume you still drive the same car you did when you were ummm minus 3 years old. Hang on a minute, I call bullshit!

[Murphyx]

Murph’s Baclofen (or should that be BacloFUN) diary

Fluff, if your daughter continues to crap around your garden fence you need to get her some help. It just doesn't seem a healthy thing to do.

Actually, scratch that, let her carry on, the video of it will probably eventually end up on one of those websites I frequent.