Bruun's Titting UP

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Bruun's Titting UP

You too, Bruun, you too.
Keep it going! Woop woop!

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hypnotherapy

Whoop whoop!

So I made an appt with a hypnotherapist for next week to treat my over eating/drinking and lack of sufficient discipline with alcohol and exercise, and to treat my anxiety. To prepare, I'm to write down what happens right before I feel anxiety.

This morning, I woke up with every noise in the early morning, distant dogs barking, traffic, a car zooming by, with a jolt. I've had this my entire adult life, this electrical zap of anxiety that I can feel through to my fingertips. My body jumps and it feels like I imagine one of those shock things they do on TV to jump start the heart. Its one reason I started drinking in the first place. And drinking made it worse over time, because I could withstand the jolt less well as I got physically weaker.

I'm 3 days AF and jolting in spite of 40mg baclofen and 600mg gabapentin. It had stopped for a while but it seems like I've gotten aclimated to the dose and it's started up. Maybe it's the edge of PMS because certainly that makes my nerves stand on end.

Ugh. Does everyone feel this? I don't like the answer of "up the dose" because I can only do so much baclofen before my blood pressure goes up.

[Doggygirl]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hi Bruun. As you already no I have nothing informed to say about doseage. I wanted to congratulate you on 3 AF days!!! That is huge. That was the longest 72 hours of my life it seemed.

I will be very interested to hear how the hypnosis session(s) works out .

DG

[bleep]

Bruun's Titting UP

I got the zaps, but only when I was titrating up Bruun. I haven't had them for ages. If you say you've gotten them you're whole life, I'd be wary of attributing them to baclofen, or have I misread something there?

Good luck with the therapist.

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Yes bleep, you're missing something or I wasn't clear which is very possible! I'm definitely not blaming bac for my zaps. I had different, milder zaps on bac when I titrated up. These are much more intense and shake me up pretty violently. It's crazy.

I am saying I've always had those zaps and I attribute them to anxiety. I titrated up to 40mg last night on baclofen and slept 9.5 hours. My dog had to wake me up this morning! No zaps today! I attribute the lack of zaps to baclofen. However, I don't want to live my whole life relying on baclofen to control my anxiety zaps, I'll never be able to afford it if I don't have a job when I'm really old. I imagine a very old crone zapping herself to death with old people's worries. Thus, the hypnotherapist to help me further control my thoughts and feelings.

[Doggygirl]

Bruun's Titting UP

Today is a new day Bruun. :l

DG

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Thanks DG, you are so special. :l:l:l

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

hey there bruun. so sorry to hear about the zaps. bloomin awful! so great that you are going to hypnotherapy. you may remember it was really effective for me, and i'm sure it would've stuck if i hadn't talked to my lawyer... you remind me, i need to call that guy again for a refresher session. i'm just not sure when i'll do that. not quite ready to kick this beast (cigs), but they're certainly not helping anything. i hope it goes very well for you. i am convinced that it's a star winner in the fight against our demons. can't wait to hear how it goes...

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Yep Rudy, one demon at a time. AL, ex, later smokes.

How many visits did you have? How much did they cost? This one is a special deal for $75.00 (normally $95) for 55 minutes.

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

mine was one two-hour visit for, errr, $250. but he guarantees it, and i think he'll do a free follow up. the cost equals about two months of smoking for me. pretty much worth it. and i DID lose interest in smokes for a whole day, even through computer failure. that chat with my lawyer left me wanting to cling to my only remaining life line, which, as we know, is really a death line.

funny, two hours of hypno is still cheaper than one hour with said lawyer! maybe i should quit the lawyer, go to hypno a bunch of times, and REALLY quit smoking. (but then i'd be out many thousands of dollars for lack of good representation. bad option.)

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Maybe you can provide hypno to your ex and his lawyer. Prescripted by you, of course, for benefit of your outcome in court.

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

somehow i am quite confident that i won't need to do that. i think the outcome will be VERY beneficial to me, and will happen out of court. fingers crossed, but no need for the magic of hypnosis.

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Good on you Rudy. If I were the judge, I'd award you the lion's share.

Update: I went to a hypnotherapist yesterday, and I asked whether weight loss (sugar avoidance) or anxiety would be fastest to treat, she said anxiety was faster/easier. Shocked the hell outta me.

So she proceeded to peel back the layers of how I got to this anxious place. I told her about the zaps that shake me to my fingertips. She had never heard such extreme physical manifestation of stress before. So then she asked me certain questions about my childhood, like why would I feel like I needed to be alert at all times at home, in bed, etc. Her line of questions dragged up all sorts of stuff which explained why I can never relax, and she told me I had a very traumatic childhood. Which is something I knew but felt I was overreacting. Apparently not everyone has the life experiences I had. I always felt like I couldn't feel burdened by my childhood, I'm over 40, get over it, and its not like I was raped as a child or starved or saw my family killed like people all over the world experience every day. But this anxiety is directly traceable to a dozen traumas including daily situations of lack of safety and for the first time in my life, someone validated that I'm anxious for good reason. BOY THAT FELT GOOD. Then she conducted a hypnosis session tailored to all those things and gave me a CD of the session to use again and again in the coming weeks.

She told me I'd possibly feel angry, sad, alot of deep-seated feelings over the next day or two. Which I did. I woke up this AM extremely angry at a woman from my HOA dogpark who lets her dog continuously confront my dog aggressively with nips and growls. I try to discipline him but she says to her dog, Ike don't bother that dog, he's a weanie. When it should be her disciplining her bully dog. And I am the protective mother that I never had. I'm going to bring a spray bottle next time and nail her dog each time with straight vinegar in the eyes. FUCK THEM.

I'm going back to the hypnotist at least three times, I am buying a package set of four visits. I am very hopeful. I feel shit coming to the surface.

[SlipperyPete]

Bruun's Titting UP

That's great news, B, and fuck that dog! I wanna see a vid of that other mutt when the vinegar hits its eyes.

Yes it's great to finally hear someone actually listen to your thoughts and validate your feelings. Rare, but great. And here I was, about to tell you that you're crazy for no good reason!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hey, Bruun. I'm so glad you're...so damn proactive. It's really admirable.

And when that crap gets all stirred up I think of it as a good thing, just so long as you don't swallow it back down again! (Not suggesting you should slug the dog owner or the dog. :H just sayin. I was out with the Goose last night and these poor people had this young 'un on a leash and he acted like he wanted to tear poor Goose up. The pup just needed to RUN. Not that I want him running anywhere near us, or would hesitate to bite him back if his antics were directed at my dog. So I totally get what you're saying... I digress...)

Keep it up sister... You're inspiring me!
:l