Bruun's Titting UP

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

I've been told for depression to take 4-6 grams of fish oil a day, high quality stuff - Kirkland 1200mg gives 684mg of Omega 3, (EPA 410 and DHA 274). This is the more expensive Kirkland fish oil, and although it has formaldehyde it was high quality according to my doc. He would prefer me to buy his own brand at three times the cost but ... :H

Also in the books popular here - Joan Larson, Julia Ross and Roberta Jewell - celtic and other fish eaters by genetics are more prone to depression and alcoholism/addiction due to deficiency in the American diet due to processed foods and even unprocessed foods - corn/grain fed chicken/beef/fish do not have the benefits of grass/pastured protein sources. Look at your eggs next time you buy and get the pastured hen eggs for better DHA. Same with all other stuff.

Check this out. Omega-3 Fatty Acids and Bipolar Disorder
Dream comes next.

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

I dreamed I was a young beautiful and very sheltered Asian woman, I was at the parking valet in the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion or the Music Center in downtown LA and it was around 1970. I was having dinner with my true love and his parents, and I was about to be engaged. So I was presented with a folded white fabric as an engagement presentation, at dinner, and I knew it was my love?s mother?s engagement dress, a very honored tradition, to hand it down. It was a white formal gown with a boned bodice on top, and a pleated white mini (!) on the bottom, like a sculpted cheerleaders skirt. I changed into it and came back to dinner as part of the family.

I was not only the bride to be, but I was an onlooker, there was a camera in the hat I wore, and as an onlooker I could see through it like a helmet cam only internally directed, so I could see very clearly the hairdo and the bodice of the woman/me, and it was all very high tech movie like. Damn I had nice hair!

At dinner, as was also the tradition, my fianc??s father gave us money for a house. I remember it being a sacrifice financially for them, and I was told ?the older generation moves to make room for the new generation? and that we must accept the gift.

But then I had my period at dinner, it bled onto the dress, and I was horrified because this was unpardonable. I remember panicking, going to the ladies room and secretly washed out the dress, unable to clear it enough, and the engagement was terminated. The dress was disowned as was the marriage because both were damaged goods now, and it broke my heart and my fiance?s, but we kept to tradition because there was no choice, and we parted ways. We were not allowed to show any reaction to this, as was the case when we were never able to show our emotions when the news was good during our relationship.

I woke up with my jaw and hands clenched and my entire body rigid. I thought about this, I made so many connections with the life lessons I had learned then (in my dreamlife) and was learning in my real life now, and went back to sleep and continued the dream.

I kept the stained dress even though I married another man eventually. It was washed to a pinkish color now. My daughter was getting engaged to the son of my ex-fianc? and his wife, she was my ex-best friend, they?d been married 30 years. At dinner, as was the tradition, my ex and his wife gave my daughter and their son money for a house. Since they had sold their house to do this, it was a terrible sacrifice. I had only the stained dress to hand down to my daughter for the marriage, and she gently refused it saying, this is a new time and we don?t need to follow all the old traditions. So I said the same thing to my ex-fianc? and his wife, you do not need to do this, it?s too much. And my ex took my wrist and gently said, this is the short sale money, it?s for them, our generation makes room for the next. They had a double-wide that they also owned and planned to move into that. I thought, I have nothing to give my daughter. Then I woke up, and I thought, that?s why I didn?t have a daughter in this life, because I have nothing to give a daughter but fears and insecurity. And I didn?t want to settle for any marriage and I knew I couldn?t have my true love, so I didn?t get married. Then I kicked my cat a little, by mistake and she got up and came over to me (I pat the bed next to me and she hears it and comes) and laid down with two paws on me. She?s been taught to not climb on top of me nor to knead me, so she was being very careful. She reminded me of the Asian girl I was in the dream, she?s a very proper cat although she?s high maintenance which I wasn?t. She only put her paws where she?s allowed and she really wanted to knead ? I could feel her claws wanting to do their thing, tiny impulses to knead and she was controlling herself, good girl! She was purring and eventually fell asleep, and tucked her cold little paws under me. I didn?t get back to sleep, my mind went crazy making connections in my dream to my reality, all sorts of reflections from one in the other, all sorts of lessons being learned and parallels.

Wish I could have written them down!

[spacebebe01]

Bruun's Titting UP

WOW, thats some dream and seems very disturbing, Im not going to try and put meaning to it. How are you today Bruun, are you still off the hard stuff? your kitty cat sounds lovely, I would love to have a cat but have 2 dogs that hate cats so cant. Take care

[Doggygirl]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hi Bruun and friends! Wow Bruun - that is quite a dream! No interpretive powers here, except that it sure seems your kitty LURVES you!

Big study day - quick break for lunch.

LoOp - I just recently started trying to study up on Leptin (and yes Bruun- there is a thread in Holistic that has been unvisited by me in a LOOOONG time). My guess is that there is MUCH more to come on this hormone that is not even known today. Like every other dang thing related to "healthy diet" it seems there are a variety of opinions out there. Leptin Resistance (receptor site problems) seems to be the buzz phrase of the day. Jack Kruse has an opinion about it. Another doctor (the author of Fast-5) agrees with him on one major point (NO SNACKING BETWEEN MEALS) but disagrees about the critical nature of eating a gazillion grams of protein first thing in the morning. Have you read any of that stuff LoOp? What's your take on Leptin resistance and how to improve that condition?

I have heard/read the same things about Omega 6 - we already get way too much in our diets. That is one big reason my doctor is really an advocate of grass fed beef only. (which I do unless I'm eating out, which is rare)

Well....I've got a quiz tomorrow morning so I better get crackin'. Hope everyone is having a BEAUTIFUL day. See you later at the campfire!

DG

[LadyLush]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hey all!

I had to actually work today so couldn't be here!
DG, My last big asthma attack was that one on the mound at 13. Matt, my son was born in 1988 and I had one more that New Years Eve (I was 28). He was born in December.
WOWZA, kicked my @$$ but never again. I think I grew out of it and then the hormones raging after his birth was the last hurrah!

I will catch up reading in a moment. My daughter NEEDS supper!

Love everyone!:l

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Since we were sharing silly stories on the threads, thought I'd share this one which is pretty embarrassing if you get embarrassed much. I told a friend about this and she was mortified for me, but I just laughed hysterically.

So I'm looking for a physical therapist/personal trainer type of person, and called up a couple of local people, meanwhile getting TONS of telemarketing from drug companies - 20 calls a day - so when this Russian lady calls me back and asks for me, I assume by her exotic accent that she's one of those damn telemarketers. And I say, "I'm so sorry, she passed away this last weekend" and the trainer says "What? But she called me today!?" and I sorta stuttered "oh I'm not dead, I'm just telling the telemarketers I'm dead" ...

Anyways, we had a chat and she said she'd call, but she never did. Think I spooked her good.

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

funny story, bruun! but that dream...! wow! i think you've got a good start on your interpretation. i'd add that thing about the period being an obvious nod to stuff you've done in your life (like drink) that has ruined important chances. maybe some female shame in there, too? (how were your father/brothers toward you?) then a generation later the breaking of tradition: loosening of old grips, ones that cost dearly. but still making a sacrifice in the name of family (selling the house to move into a double-wide!), hmm... good stuff! i have found dreams that served a real purpose in my life, at the time. can't think of a single example at the moment, but it's fun to mull them over when they happen, see what we can glean. when you remember some of your theories, do tell!

sounds like you have a heck of a cat!

i go bed now. early early. zzz zzz.

xo rudy

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

...oh yeah, and i know what you mean about the law of attraction. that part of it is tricky! i'll call you back when i have the answer. or maybe my mother will chime in, i'm sure she's thought about this. mom?

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Thanks Roo, thought you might give it a go, you have good instincts. Female shame - girls vacuumed under the boy's feet in my family, did all the cleaning and kitchening and alot of childcare while boys didn't do anything except some childcare. And so there was this powerplay set up in my youth. I vividly remember in fourth grade my teacher telling the class that women historically and in many parts of the world have been seen as inferior to men and my jaw dropped to the floor. It upset me, I remember, and has stuck to me like some vivid snapshots do.

Thanks, that was an awfully good interpretation.

DG, hope your studying is going well. LL, hugs and Space, you can have this cat, she will slap the hell out of any dog and get them to behave.

I hope!

[Isolde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Like the Law of Attraction, another thing recently popped back up for me after a year of first coming across it - EFT.
I came across it again while reading one of Dr. Mercola's newsletters yesterday. I gave it a try when I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't fall back asleep. It didn't work. I've been awake since 3:15. Anyone have any experience with EFT? It seems to make me feel better in the moment when I'm doing it, but the effects don't last. I have a feeling I'm not putting enough behind it.

[Doggygirl]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hi everyone! Wow we have so many common interests around here. Is - I have never learned anything about EFT, but have been intrigued by it - also from seeing it on Dr. Mercola's site. I can't offer any insights as I have never pursued it. But it sure sounds like something worth looking into. Waking up and not being able to get back to sleep SUUUUUCKKKKKS!!! That is all.

rudyb - you are very insightful i think!

bruun - how is your week going so far? mine is nutty. oops - i forgot to start capitalizing again!!!

Long day at school and I really need to get some reading done this evening. So I'm going to just make this one a fly by, but wanted to pop in and say hi to everyone. I hope you are all having a terrific day.

DG

[RudyB]

Bruun's Titting UP

bruun, glad you liked my input, you're welks. i gotta say again, that was quite a dream! isn't it awesome when you remember so much detail?! god, jung and joseph campbell had it goin' on, and so do we!

howdy to you too, doggy! my day was fine, my evening was doldrums, my now is about to be the freedom of the bed, the it's-okay-to-languish-a-bit kinda bedtime, since it's nice and early, and i've got miles to go before i have to wake. i'm burning through annie lamott, so i'll have to poke about for the next runner-up...

i really am not down with these early nights. it's all coming back to me just how long and dark our winters are. i'm bracing myself.

sweet dreams, all. (i kinda miss those bac-crazy picture-stories, myself. but i might get some tonight, as i just noticed i left 90 of my now 130 mg dose until 20 minutes ago. am i in for a wild ride? i'll be sure to report back with details if i get one...)

xoxo rudy

[Isolde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Hi DG! Thanks for stopping by.
Hope you're reading something that you find interesting!

Mercola's EFT is quite a bit different from the original version that I learned, which is Gary Craig's EFT (the founder). Mercola's is easier, you look nuts doing both though! :H

I'm also on the lookout for a new book. Although I found out recently that I am 2 books behind for one of my favorite authors, Jacqueline Carey. I am trying so hard to wait until I get my (replacement) Kindle for Christmas before I start buying any more books. I remember thinking that I wouldn't like the Kindle, but being able to download books (usually for cheaper than the paperback version), start reading them immediately, and not having them take up any additional space is just fantastic.

I was reading this morning (something I already knew), that when you wake up and can't fall back asleep, you're supposed to get up and go into another room and do something quiet until you feel tired again. I just don't see that being a good idea, I'd never get back to sleep. But reading for a bit sounds like a good compromise. And then there's smoking a bit of weed, which is what I did on occasion when I was too bac'd up to sleep much. I don't know why I forgot all about that until this morning (when it was way too late to do anything about it). I'll employ that tonight if need be. But the klonopin might be enough to keep me sleeping soundly. I try to reserve it for dire circumstances. It gives me a great night's sleep, and has me feeling mellow and relaxed the next day, but if taken too often, it completely zaps me of any spark and has me craving alcohol and bad food.
Oddly enough, I really haven't been all that tired during the day. I'm actually beginning to wonder if maybe my body only needs 5-6 hours now? That just doesn't seem right to me though. But it's not anxiety about the alarm about to go off that keeps me up, because I had the same issue this past weekend - sleep well for about 5 or 6 hours, and then wake up. Although now when I wake up in the middle of the night, I do worry that I won't be able to fall back asleep, and so I don't - self-fulfilling prophecy. I think if I can just get a few nights that I sleep straight through (by whatever means), then I'll have broken the pattern.

Bruun, that is absolutely hilarious about you telling the trainer you were dead!! :H I'm sure you were mortified, but thanks for sharing here, it gave me a much needed laugh!!

I hear ya on the early dark, Roo. It ends up feeling so much later than it is. I think that's part of the reason I've been getting to bed so early lately as well. It feels like the day is over by the time I leave work in the evening. I do like that it gets brighter earlier though.

My kombucha has a serious mother going on now!! Woot! I'm so excited. I even got a glass gallon jar. My ex had this big jar of sweet peppers, and I asked him if he would consider moving them into some tupperware so that I could have the jar, and he did. He knows all about my crazy experiments. He got to see the daily kefir farming first hand.

Speaking of dairy, I picked up some more raw milk and butter at the farmer's market today. And they had raw cottage cheese. I was SO tempted. But it was $7.50 a pint!! That would only be 2 small servings at best, and I just couldn't see spending that much. They also had goat milk kefir, but I've learned from recent experience that I'm not a fan of goat milk. It has the same twang that goat cheese has (though I love goat cheese).

My, how I've rambled on. Well, time to dry my hair, eat some dinner, relax and turn in early!

[Doggygirl]

Bruun's Titting UP

Wow Bruun I forgot to say how funny that was about you telling the PT you were dead!! :H I'm going to remember that one!

rudyb - you are so right about the time change and super early darkness being such a palpable sign of winter coming. i couldn't believe it was nearly dark here at 4:30pm today. (it was cloudy though - hopefully it won't be as dark at 4:30 if the sun comes out this week???) hope you are lounding and resting and enjoying your read.

Is I definitely need to learn more about EFT! Sounds wild! Do you think I should explore the Mercola version or the original? I would fall out of my bed if I slept 8 hours straight. OMG. I usually am lucky to sleep 2 hours straight. I'm just happy if I fall back to sleep right away. You younguns have no idea what you are in for with menopause.

Brenda, are you lurking? I thought of you this evening. I was looking at the latest Aerosoles shoe catalog. Of course everything in there is boots boots boots this time of year. There was a thigh down picture of, well, boots with legs in them. The legs had some sort of tights with a texture or slight print that made the legs appear to be hairy. I immediately thought of you and wondered if your legs would look similar in those boots.

How are you LadyLush? Still hanging in there? I hope so! What's new?

Bruun!!!! You have the best campfires evah.

Have any of you ever read the e-book / heard of / tried intermittent fasting according to the Fast-5 protocol? I've been dabbling with that lately and I have to say, it seems to be reducing my struggles with sugarcarbies and food obsession in general. I'm going to try to stick with it for a while and see how it goes with a lot more time.

Well, I'm heading for a nice hot shower and bed time. LOL I have to watch a bit of TV for homework. In Human Development, the teacher assigned us to watch 3 TV shows from different decades and write short papers with observations about stereotypes and how they have changed. I Tivo'd up some Dick Van Dyke, The Jeffersons, and Roseanne last night. That aught to give me some hillarious material if I can stay awake long enough! Funny - this assignment is going to take far longer to do than most others put together, despite the fun sound of it!!!

Nighty Night all. Sleep tight. And if you ARE sleeping, I'm mighty jealous. :h

DG

[Bruunhilde]

Bruun's Titting UP

Good morning to all, chilly one here! Brrrrr, 57F in the house! Well, last week it was 55F one morning so I guess this isn't that bad.

DG, Is, I did the tapping thing a couple of years back, and do think it helps. It certainly feels tender at those points, on me.

Where IS Brenda? There's been at least one topic I thought she'd jump in on. LLush? Everyone? Hallloooo out there!

I'll take the quiet moment to give an update on myself. I've gone in the past two weeks from drinking half a litre (almost) of hard alcohol a night to last night only two beers. Last night I started the Jason Vale book, and I am hoping it really helps me last this time.

I've been depressed for a long time, and anxious as winter and the holidays approach. My mind is racing with regrets and remembrances and all that crap - I'm full time trying to stop it, and replace it. Spent all morning doing that.

Stomach still funky, but with less AL is getting a bit better. It was starting to go into full melt-down mode before I started tapering. i wasn't sleeping but awake most of the night with a bucket by my side and the lights going on and off as I went back and forth to the bathroom. I guess each time I need to hit the floor before I get back on track. Today I'm still depressed but I keep telling myself it will get better, this feeling is temporary and false. If I stayed with AL, next year would be even worse. If I get off it, by Xmas I could feel 100% better and look better too. Its amazing the toll drinking takes on my weight and my face. The older you get, the more of a toll it takes.

I tapered back also on baclofen and gabapentin, as my BP was getting out of sorts, and generally I've been feeling bad and more of either was making it worse.

My dad is visiting "because he feels guilty" for visiting my brother and not me last week. Makes me feel bad. Dad drinks his wine nightly too, so I have to either get him to a restaurant or buy wine, and he prefers Two Buck Chuck. Wish me strength.

Warming up in here now, sun is high. Have a good day everyone!