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    Bruun's Titting UP

    Hey DG,

    Glad to hear your cravings are under control - I know you have your triggers too, but I'm glad you're managing so well. 1000+ days, right? A role model!

    I'm going to shop for Spanx this weekend between chores and hopefully a friend visit, because I fit into a smaller pant but afraid it will show too much untoned butt.

    Going to Vegas this coming week. Looking forward to getting out of here for a while. Need a change of pace, most definitely.

    How about you? You are such a wonderful caretaker, how do you take care of yourself?

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      Bruun's Titting UP

      Wow, bleep69's biggest dream was to hit Vegas with a wad of cash for a month long party! I just saw your post, and my initial reaction was "Woohoo! Vegas!" but now I'm not so sure what I'd do there! Live poker bores me, I much prefer online, and normal gambling is not my scene, the house will win in the long run.

      Saying that, I'd still like to go. I'm sure you'll have a gas Bruun. Are you a gambler?

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        Bruun's Titting UP

        Hey bleep,

        I'm not a gambler, and it's a work thing, a bunch of meetings and exhibit booths. Dream on. No wads of cash here, I'm afraid.

        By the way, my first diet is over, lost ten pounds, am going to do Atkins for a week or two and then we'll see what's next. Need to do this a few more times. Was not able to go AF the whole time, had several cheat days with AL. Otherwise I might have lost another few pounds.

        I skipped bac two days in a row and it was at the PMS point of my month, I had panic attacks and AL. Started the bac again and the LO and had a good long talk about how to grow old and not destitute which I keep feeling is my destiny (the destitute part) despite working since I was 9 and through college and never spending big wads of cash on vacations and things. That thought cycle sends me to gloom and doom and the bottle every time. I was reading about Baby Boomers not being able to retire unless they're married and /or have been the lucky ones to make loads of cash or have pensions. Pensions have gone the way of the fart in polite society with much less fortunate consequences.

        Anyways, bac on 25mg baclofen 20mg LO and feeling calm.

        Hope everyone has a really nice weekend.

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          Bruun's Titting UP

          Bruun, your description of vegas and a conference and exhibition booths sure brings back memories. I used to be a corporate road warrier and am so glad to not be doing that any more!!! I think if I went to vegas today and had a bit of cash (dream on!) I would just show hop. Gambling has never been my thing but I could watch shows such as Cirque de Soleil and Sig....(sp) & Roy (the animal magicians - did the one who got mauled by the tiger recover and are they doing an act again?) etc. Do that all night and then sleep in and soak up some afternoon sun, and then repeat. How's that for my dream of Vegas! :H

          I'm glad to hear you are bac on bac and LO. That made me think about how I will use some tools, find that they work, and then stop using them. I am reading a book about food addiction right now but of course addiction is addiction and she talks about how the "lower brain" over rules the logical, decision making higher brain in matters such as this. Again...low seratonin comes up as a factor in addiction.

          Well, now I am rambling! When do you leave?

          DG
          Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
          Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


          One day at a time.

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            Bruun's Titting UP

            Hey DG, how did you change careers? I'd be interested to know. Eww, just heard my dog fart.

            Anyways, UPDATE for my situation. Interesting stuff, if a tad less fab than desired.

            I went off HCG and B12 injections as of today Sunday, and my blood pressure went way up. Had to begin my old dose of three hypertensive meds as my BP went from 115/59 last week (then I removed a pill) to 159/89 today. Added back the third pill and took an extra baclofen. My BP is now normal (120/80) but my face is red and hot. Weird.

            I had hoped the baclofen or fat loss (9-10lbs) were the reason for my BP going down, but nah, expectations/hopes dashed. Took 50mg baclofen today, and yesterday, to help with cravings and anxiety, but certainly did not move my BP in the direction hoped. I think the HCG or B12 are the only remaining factors I can isolate as the BP change agents.

            If it's the HCG, then maybe my hypertension is due to hormone issues which are also the reason - potentially -for the women in my family having hair loss, fertility issues and depression. Interesting stuff. Hope to restart the HCG in a week or two and then will know whether it's the HCG or not.

            I have B12 ampoules but no syringes right now, so can't test that theory yet.

            Vegas baby, hope my Southwest flight doesn't have an accidental sunroof open over my head tomorrow!

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              Bruun's Titting UP

              Geez - sometimes I feel like I'm just one giant chemistry experiment. Do you feel that way too? I'm so sorry about your BP going up again. I hope you are able to isolate what sends it up and brings it down - that would be nice to know I'm sure!!

              Dog farts. :H

              While I was still in deep denial about my alcholism, I ceased being able to function in an executive type role. Hence a career change back to a sales role with slightly less travel. Continued travel down into the alcoholism pit left me really unable to do that job any more. However I blamed my problems on my boss (who really WAS an ass, but that was really beside the point). When he started closing in on me for drinking on the job, rather than face the problem I QUIT. Still hard to believe defending my addiction was worth walking away from the money I was making at the time.

              Thank goodness, I have a wonderful husband who financially propped us up through that. I ended up just starting to work with our own small business and we are making ends meet, and happy this way. Not making the Big Bucks from the old days, but not traveling all the time and not suffering in denial of my addiction.

              That's the real story.

              Any other story that I chose to leave corporate life to work in our family business is a story missing the facts about how alcoholism affected me professionally.

              When my boss scheduled a meeting with me in Chicago (he is in Buffalo NY) to "go over my performance review" when it wasn't time for a performance review, I "knew." Then when he walked off the plane with a woman I didn't recognize, and introduced her as "The HR Lady" I wanted to throw up. My worst fears were coming true. They accused me of drinking on the job. I denied it. (hard to prove when one is remote!) The smart HR lady obviously was used to that sort of thing. She just calmly put me on a Performance Improvement Plan and let me know that even a suspicion of drinking on the job would be enough to get me in deeper trouble. Of couse she also reminded me of the Employee Assistance Program. Denial was still running deep so I of course informed her I DID NOT need THAT.

              Anyway...life has turned out pretty good despite that dark time. I also found that I can live just fine on a lot less than I used to think I needed. I would never want to go back to the corporate slavery place just like I would never willingly go back to AL. It all works out in the end.

              More than you bargained for there, eh?

              I too hope there is o sun roof on your plane tomorrow!

              DG
              Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
              Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


              One day at a time.

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                Bruun's Titting UP

                Lithium Orotate, Low Dose Baclofen, and Young Hot Brazilians

                Ah, DG, love your story, gives me hope. Thanks for keeping posting here.

                And here's my UPDATE!! :whee:I was in Vegas for a few days at a conference, 60,000 other attendees with me, including one very hot Brazilian extra-sexy guy that I don't remember the name of but whom had some very fabulous hot hot abs and other *nice parts*.

                I was fabulous on my diet, even lost another pound there, eating very Atkins/Paleo and having no carb martinis. Needless to say, I was not fabulous on the AL front. Or the good girl front. I was very badly behaved and loved every precious second of it. Hopefully the coworker who was with me doesn't share too much of the story. Luckily she doesn't know the best parts of the story - nor the best parts of the Brazilian.

                I'm now drinking again, and about to start my AL titration downward - which I do by switching from Sapphire martinis to diluted Sapphire martinis to wine to beer over the course of a few days. It works for me, so long as I take xanax at the witching hour, along with baclofen and lithium orotate. So you may see me drunk post for a couple of days and then get sober. That's my plan, anyways. The fact that I've spent many AF evenings by myself at home gives me the peace to know I can do that again. Even with my Vegas party, I am drinking half of what I used to, which is showing in my blood pressure and face/weight. I also find that on days when I'm AF, my blood pressure is much lower the next day. That plus 10+ pounds off the ass have helped me stop dragging myself around and start strutting. And THAT gives me even more confidence that I can beat the Beast. Two people I hadn't seen in 5 years told me I look like a different person. One told me I looked like I'd had my face done (facelift). The other commented on my weight loss, so I was flying high, baby!

                Oops, hit post instead of preview. And no, not drunk posting right now!

                :catroll:

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                  Bruun's Titting UP

                  Hopefully, the coworker remembers the logo "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas". Sounds like the hot Brazilian is just what you needed girl. And did you not know, Brazilians love a big booty? I think it's where the butt implant was created. :H

                  I have no doubt you will get the booze under control. I wonder what I would do if I were in your situation this week. Well, definately the Brazilian, but about the booze on bac. It makes me wonder if I will ever again "enjoy" a good party. Hmmm. Things to consider from the other side.

                  I'm glad to see you are back my dear. We've missed you! With a new spring in your step, no less. :goodjob:
                  This Princess Saved Herself

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                    Bruun's Titting UP

                    I wish you were right Redhead, but this one has a big damn mouth so I have no real hope that she'll zip it. It's like she has bac brain herself, one second she's swearing she'll keep secrets, the next sentence is my secret out to other coworkers.

                    I know exactly what you mean about worrying that you may never enjoy a crazy night like that again. It has occurred to all of us, I think, but we all know what it leads to. Thanks for the warm welcome back! That felt good toooooo! :l

                    I'm going to sign up for a dating website right now! Fired up, and feeling twitchy! I definitely needed that shot in the um arm!

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                      Bruun's Titting UP

                      Bruun,
                      You go my friend! Damn, wish I was with you! It has been nothing less than exciting around here; Murph and sheep and all :-) Otherwise pretty quiet. Glad you are back and hope Vegas was the best,,,Brazillian...hmmm, lots of hair on his chest and....lots of hair on his chest? AWESOME!

                      Lady:l
                      The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.

                      *Don't look where you fall, look why you slipped*

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                        Bruun's Titting UP

                        Nice, Bruun! You deserved yourself a hot Brazilian boy!

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                          Bruun's Titting UP

                          I totally did and so do you two hot chicas.

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                            Bruun's Titting UP

                            Bruun!!! :yougo::yougo: You have my deepest admiration for Snagging and Bagging that Hot Brazilian Boy. :h:h Welcome Home!!!!

                            I met Mr. Doggy through an internet dating site. I can highly recommend it. My brother met his girlfriend (of about 5 years now) through one of the big name dating sites that cost $$$ - if you said the name I would know it. e-Harmony is it.

                            Glad you are at least drinking less. Hope you get ready to really batten down the hatches and kick AL to the curb. Even more years will fall off of you!!!! I showed my fat picture which was only 1 week off of AL to a lady today. (yes, I carry it with me as a constant reminder of how it used to be!!!) She couldn't believe it was me. She didn't know what to say. So what came out was "well....I guess your legs have always been skinny??" :H (yeah) Anyway...

                            So good to have you back. Now. I suspect I speak for many of us here when I say - how 'bout more info on that Hot Brazilian Boy??? Pictures? Come on now. Be honest. You took at least ONE picture with your cell phone, now didn't you????? Don't be selfish and stingy! Share!!



                            DG
                            Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                            Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


                            One day at a time.

                            Comment


                              Bruun's Titting UP

                              You too funny DG,

                              In fact my mouthy co-worker took pics of me and the nasty German man ("you must come fuck me") and the lovely Brazilian boy ("would you like me to do a strip-tease?"). And guess which picture came out? NOT the cute Brazilian... And this German man, the teeth on the guy, everyone was like, where's the old horse that mouth belongs to? Or the old whore, more likely, rotten yellow horsey teeth. Hey, I spent money on my teeth, and I take care of them so I deserve good teeth back!

                              Also, I suspect Brazilian Boy had more fun stripping in front of the hotel window than anything else, fetisher that he was. Also, he kept avoiding the camera, so he was keeping Vegas in Vegas baby, all the way!

                              Good to hear that you can actually get something decent out of the websites, all I got from eHarmony was a match to a felon who said he was sorry ...

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                                Bruun's Titting UP

                                Good to have you back Bruun, glad to hear you had a good time. The German chap sounds priceless! Wonder if he finds success with that brutal line? Perhaps he tries to keep conversation to minimum to avoid displaying his gnashers much?

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